.
With all due respect staying at home is something of the past . Women and men need to study, work and be free and independent .
I don't think it's selfish. There are a lot of ppl out there that should have never had children. Some ppl just aren't parent material and it's a good thing if they realize before they reproduce.
I don't really care what ppl think. I had a friend who worked for the Children's Aid Society and in the end it is the children who suffer.
If you are going to be a parent you better be prepared to make some sacrifices. I think ppl that are too obsessed with having a big career that takes up most of their lives, should think twice about having kids.
I am a firm believer that when you have babies the mother/father should stay home for a few years. They give you a year maternity leave now and some women don't even take that! I think it is disgusting to hand your new born over to a day care when you have the opportunity to stay home and get PAID! You don't get your full pay, but in some case your employer does top you up to 100% pay.
You have to pay for day care so why the hell would you go back to work and leave your baby with strangers? If you are that eager to get back to work don't have kids..IMO.
Some ppl just don't want to put their Careers on hold. Well I think you should just concentrate on your career if it is that important and bypass having kids.
Kids deserve parents to spend time with them, not thrown at a daycare all day. I know ppl that drop kids off at 7 am and pick them up at 6pm. By the time they get home they eat and are off to bed at 8-8:30 pm.
You can stay home with the kids during the baby/toddler years and still make money, be creative. That way you can personally raise them through crucial years of learning and nobody will take care and love them as much as you.
When I had my first I stayed home and took in a few other kids (daycare) I made a decent pay and I got to spend the time with my own child.
When they start kindergarten you can get back to work. I think the sacrifice for a 4 yrs is well worth it. I never had a lot of the problems my friends did with their kids who were in daycare. Let's face it, some daycare providers are just there for the paycheck and they could really give a shit about your kid, it's just a job to them.
I often wondered why some of these women went to work because by the time they paid me, they weren't left with all that much money. You have to factor in the daycare costs, transportation costs, work clothes, etc.
You know what some mom's told me? They can't stand being at home it would drive them nuts. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh Why the hell have kids then?
To have someone else raise them? :shrug:
Anyway I can go on and on ..........I already got into all this in another thread a while back.
Too bad you didn't realize in time.
The "undesirable" part is subjective. I, myself wouldn't consider a person who lost a leg in a car accident undesirable or unfit, as long as they have someone to help them when the chores, to drive them around, etc.
That's why it's scary.
From my personal experience in life I can say that children's behaviour is like a lottery whereas you can never predict the outcome . Same siblings in the same home with the same parents and sometimes they turn to be very different from one another . It has more to do with their own thinking and brain .
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I seem to get this charge levelled at me a lot.....
who would tell you its selfish to not want children? That's just stupidity on their part. :bugeye:
Are you on earth ?.Parents usually view their children as extensions of themselves...so in that sense it is selfish.
A truly un-selfish act would be to raise some one else's child.
Parents usually view their children as extensions of themselves...so in that sense it is selfish.
A truly un-selfish act would be to raise some one else's child.
....There are parents who allow for their children to be independent individuals in the world and accept them as such.
Because then my progeny have to pay for your debilitated, crippled old ass.
This is why we can't have nice things.
One can raise an adopted child and treat it as an extension of oneself. Really I don't think you can accuse all parents as treating children as only an extension of themselves. There are parents who allow for their children to be independent individuals in the world and accept them as such.