Thread: The Most Offensive Jokes Ever!!!

  1. #1121
    Ant
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by sheepster View Post
    What pink and smells of holly?


    Ian Huntlys cock


    haha best Huntley joke I've heard! Nice one mate!

  2. #1122
    DrPantySniffer
    Guest
    great thread
    in fact
    best thread ever

  3. #1123
    Zeebo, a Nigerian orphan, has to ride 15 miles each day just to get to school on a bike with no pedals. To make it worse, he only has one leg.
    For a small donation of just £2:50, you can download the video. It's fucking hillarious!

  4. #1124
    Quote Originally Posted by redarmy11 View Post
    Are you making these up? They're certainly offensive but almost totally lacking a 'joke' element.
    Oooh! Who put sand in YOUR vagina?

  5. #1125

  6. #1126
    You wanna hear a joke eh?

    One night a little girl awoke and she decided to go into her mum and dads room, but no one was there, so she made her way to the garage, and heard something very peculiar coming from the steamed car...
    The next morning, the little girl awoke, went down stairs, and whilst eating her breakfast, asked her mother, ''what where you and dad doing last night mummy in the garage?''
    The mother paused... ''We where baking cakes my dear.''

    The next night, the girl awoke again, went into her mothers bedroom... and alas, no one was there. So she went to the bathroom, and noticed the light was on, and unusual sound where coming from the bathtub.
    The next morning, the girl asked her mother again, ''What where you and daddy doing in the bathroom last night...?''
    ''Oh... you know... baking cakes again my dear.''

    Then, on the third night, the girl crept down the stair case, and heard unusual activity in the living room.
    The next morning, the girl said, ''I know what you where doing last night mummy.''
    Th mother asked curiously... ''What?''
    ''You where baking cakes...''
    ''How do you know that?'' The mother asked in shock.
    The girl replied rubbing her tummy, ''I licked the icing off the sofa...''

  7. #1127
    McKinless
    Guest
    Flemster...make a top 50 offensive jokes, voted for by everyone!!!

  8. #1128
    McKinless
    Guest
    i LOVE these jokes...

    but cant help feeling that some1 will end up going crazy, babies in microwave, kettle etc...

  9. #1129
    Quote Originally Posted by McKinless View Post
    Flemster...make a top 50 offensive jokes, voted for by everyone!!!
    I'm all for it. Dunno how to go about setting that up tho. And I don't get much time on here so, if you wanna do it, feel free my friend...!

  10. #1130
    sheepster
    Guest
    It seems Mike Tyson may be more sensitive than we might have thought. He claims that he sometimes cries during sex....... Then again thats what mace is made for!

  11. #1131
    ginger-smurf
    Guest
    My mate has being feeling really depressed and suicidal recently

    so i decided to cheer him up, so i pushed him in front of a steam train.........












    HE WAS CHUFFED TO BITS

  12. #1132
    ginger-smurf
    Guest
    Did you hear about the look-a-like competition in China?

    Everybody won

  13. #1133
    Circumcised -- This Is Priceless!

    A teacher noticed that a little boy at the
    back of the class was
    squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not
    paying attention.
    She went back to find out what was going on.
    He was quite
    embarrassed and whispered that he had just
    recently been circumcised and
    he was quite itchy.
    The teacher told him to go down to the
    principal's office. He was to
    telephone his mother and ask her what he should do
    about it. He did it
    and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a
    commotion at the back
    of the room. She went back to investigate only to
    find him sitting at
    his desk with his weenie hanging out.
    "I thought I told you to call your mom!" she
    said.
    "I did," he said, "and she told me that if I
    could stick it out till
    noon, she'd come and pick me up from school."

    KIDS -- DON'T YOU JUST LOVE 'EM?

  14. #1134
    big brown was screwed up
    Posts
    1,867
    Quote Originally Posted by EmptyForceOfChi View Post
    the US and british governments. you cant get more of an offensive joke than that.

    peace.
    The African government.

  15. #1135
    Whats white and plastic and should be kept away from children....

    A plastic bag... oh no... Micheal Jackson... :-)

  16. #1136
    Salam Shalom Salom
    Posts
    11,529
    Hehe, what a thread!


    No offense, but let me think of some...



    Ok, one day I took a vacation to Mexico. Why did I find it deserted?


    A: Because everyone had jumped the border.

  17. #1137
    :-) Good one :-)

  18. #1138
    What do you call a gay mans balls?

    Mud flaps

  19. #1139
    Ant
    Guest
    A Scouser is sat in a bar having a few drinks. In walks a gay guy who eyes him up. After a few beers the gay guy finally plucks up the courage to speak with the Scouser.
    "Do you fancy a blow job?" he whispers. The Scouser picks up a bar stool and batters the guy to a pulp, kicking him out the door. The barman comes over and says
    "Christ! That was a bit brutal - what did he say to you?"
    "Dunno" replies the Scouser, "something about a job".

  20. #1140
    sheepster
    Guest
    What links the Thai Caving Party and The Mcann Family?
















    Theve all got fluid in their boots.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •