Just like everything else, dark matter came from nothingness in a (dark matter + anti-dark matter = 0) relationship. Since dark matter didn't collapse back into energy, it must have acheived the stable equilibrium, the way protons and electrons acheived a stable equilibrium, an equilibrium which resulted in chemistry. In the case of dark matter, there would also have to be some kind of chemistry undetectable to us.
My claims are not stupid or ridiculous. If anything, they are optimistic (which is something satanic atheists can't appreciate). By the way, this person was found with titanium panties.
Is this you? If so, you're lovely.