Goodbye thread

From sciforums_encyclopedia
This article will never give you up, let you down, or desert you.

On internet message boards such as SciForums, a goodbye thread is a sad sad occasion where one of the members - typically after long periods of deeply heart-felt emotional soul searching and introspection - decides to announce resignation from the community. This is done by creating a new topic centered around the fact that they are leaving for good.
These threads are sometimes accompanied by a diatribe how they have found themselves in some sort of position of conflict (in most cases, due to the community itself).

The aftermath

Afterwards, there is always a noticeable void in the virtual space the user once occupied. Nothing is ever the same again.
The community spends moments to contemplate the full repercussions of the stray users absence. These are horrible tearful moments where the community asks itself - what did we do wrong? How come we aren't good enough? How can we change? Why are we such terrible terrible people? Why!!!!!!
After a long period of grieving, a multitude of new threads are soon created in memorial of the user's retirement. Others who have not quite come to terms with the loss create threads pleading for the user to come back. Sadly, these pleadings fall on deaf ears.

As for the moderators who consider themselves at fault for the member's departure, it is customary for them to morally redeem themselves by committing seppuku.

Don't let the door...

Oftentimes, the retirement of the member can be a happy occasion - especially if the member was a complete pain in the ass. It is during these threads where the retiring user finds the community responding to them with a combination of relief and contempt. These goodbye threads turn into opportunities for the retiring user to trade one last barb with the community.

Member euthanasia policy

It's been suggested that SciForums immediately permaban anyone who posts a goodbye thread. This is due to annoying habit of members announcing their departure, only to continue loitering.......followed by another meaningless goodbye thread at some point in the future.........followed by another........ and another.......... and another......

It is unconfirmed whether this policy is currently in play.

The "Goodbye Post" contest

On August 13th 2008, inzomnia started a contest to see who could create the best goodbye post.[1]