Is it possible for one to turn into the other? Could they break out of their shells, or is it stuck in their genes? Could a relationship blossom between the 2? How would it work? Give me some thoughts please.
Yes this can and does happen when the right people get together. It just takes the time to meet the others that can bring you out into the open because it is only you that holds yourself back for fear of something within you. As an example some introverts think they aren't good at communicating with others but only if others won't listen to what they are saying. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
You can be an "introvert" and be very good at communicating with others. Some "extroverts" need to stop whoring.
It may help if you understand what is actually meant by "introvert". Introverts are not necessarily "shy". http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion#Varieties
Nope. I assume you mean introverts. They aren't in a shell. They value and get pleasure from solitary activities more than social ones. It's genetic. Yes. It happens all the time. The same as any other relationship; however, based on the question I suspect you have some notion of how it wouldn't work and it may make more sense for you to describe that.
Intro/Extrovert are labels of convenience. Reality is independent of the labels we apply. So yes to all three questions - if we use the terms keeping the above in mind. Strictly speaking, by putting a philosophical word-constraint on the question, I can answer no to all three questions, or yes or no depending on what authorities on the matter I appeal to, and what definitions I hold true. But I don't believe in most of psychology and the terms they use so I am quick to dismiss and not give credit to intro/extrovert speak. Shy people gain confidence & overly confident people can quickly quiet down. People are plastic for the most part. However you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and genes do determine a good deal of behavior. I was once very shy, and now I'm very open. The same can be true for anyone I believe. Whether two partners will work together is not a question that is answered this way. A relationship is far more complicated, however in my experience when I had very quiet girlfriends it made my life at parties far more complicated, as I would have to work hard to include her in the fun stuff. She would want to leave early, and would get upset if I got too drunk and concentrated more on friends. It's good to have a bit of equality in that regards. Over time she opened up more, like anyone can do, and if we still dated the problem would probably be gone by now.
These labels seem not to apply to everyone they attempt to describe. I can be very outgoing in small groups, and yet some people would call me an "introvert" (and as though it as a bad thing). Several years ago, I came across a different definition/explanation. I admit that I have slanted it a little to make being extroverted seem like a "bad thing". Some people need to be in a crowd to be happy; others act to stimulate them. Such people are also called "extroverts". I knew a guy who, when he went home after work to his apartment where he lived alone, he "had to" turn on the TV and radio to feel comfortable. These people are the truly lonely people. They don't need to be the center of attention; they just need to feel that they're not alone. Such a student needs to have the TV or radio on in order to study so they're not distracted with a where-is-everybody feeling. I wouldn't be surprised if these people are the ones who can't easily "work independently" as some employers require. On the other hand, there's the students who need quiet to study, otherwise, s/he is distracted and cannot concentrate as well. For them, they are overly sensitive to the presence of others, and feel that they must pay attention to everyone present. Strangely enough, they are labeled as "introverts" as though it was a bad thing. They perform well one-on-one and in small groups. However, big crowds can overwhelm their ability to pay attention to everyone, and they can grow tiresome and want a bit of respite. A big gathering can feel like Grand Central Station. They don't often feel lonely; they're content knowing there's a world full of people out there even if they can't sense it. So, I obviously disagree with the "introvert" label and thinking it's "wrong" or "bad", and that they must be fixed or healed.
In answer to your question(s): No. We are not "stuck in a shell". We are not broken and need fixing. Sure. Happens all the time. Be aware of the other's needs. Introverts find too much external stimulation as draining. My girlfriend (an extrovert) has music or the TV going at her house all the time. Silence gets on her nerves. OTOH, my house is usually quiet. She starts going "stir crazy" if she has too much "downtime". She needs to get out among people to recharge her batteries. I start feeling drained and "claustrophobic" around too many people and need to "withdraw" to recharge. And, remember the E/I axis is not an ON/OFF switch. It's a scale.
As has been explained, these labels do not describe all the reasons for this behavior. People can appear introverted or extroverted for a variety of reasons, some of them genetic, some not. Shy people and autistic people can appear to be the same, but their behavior can have very different causes.
Labels are the problem, in my opinion, and the attitudes which society attaches to those labels. Introverts and extroverts are neither one better than the other, although the traits of either may be better for certain applications. Those of us who work graveyard shift at my place of employment, as example, are all more introverted than extroverted, which works wonderfully well for the task at hand. Each of us is capable of working independently with little to no supervision once the night's objectives have been assigned. We do not socialize outside of work, though some nights on the job we may be a bit 'chatty' if circumstances and personal energy levels permit. Many consider me to be extroverted because I am capable of 'acting' extroverted, when it seems that the best defense may be a strong offense. :bugeye:
Well in a current situation, I've heard that some "introverts" become overwhelmed to the point where they are not happy with the ones they love because the other is to out there (is, talking to random people when out, always having something to say).... ANYWAYS! Would you all say that its a fight to get along? Would you be willing to wait and be there for the other person if they are wanting to change? Is the extroversion considered a huge issue?
I think most of you are introverts and that is why you don't like the " Labels" All so Sciforum is your release you keep bottled up otherwise. There is a big difference in the 2 personalities ( I just had a daja-voodoo right now like i typed this already so strange ) You can force your introverted self to be out going . I do . The extrovert don't force then selves . It is there nature and if they don't get the attention look out they have been known to go get a gun and blow you away . Usually they don't have to do that cause they can just dominate what ever is going on by bully methods of dismissal as they continue to go Bla Bla Bla . There is a big difference cause they always want to lead the group like they are the boss of every one . They are the person that speaks at a meeting with a 3 minute time limit per speaker and go 120 minutes with out taking a breath and then when tell them there time is long gone up they will say One more thing and keep talking . People all the time think I am an extrovert . Not ! It is trained behavior over may years . Toast Masters was the best training I got in this and if you want to explore your A personality then I highly recommend "Toast Masters " One of the first things you learn is to get rid of " ands and ahs in you speech. You can watch T.V. news and see how bad people are at this . Now I come by that naturally " Not to say Ah after every word like some do . My public speaking is smoother than my let it all hang out posts of S.F. The other thing is run on sentences . You loose the audience when you do that . The human mind likes shorter snappier Memes . Here is a good tip Look at people in the Audience as if you are talking right to that person . You pick out individuals evenly spaced threw out the audience and talk right to them . The rest of the audience thinks you are talking to all of them leaving no one out . The other thing to be a good good A personality is to learn how to Facilitate. It is harder than you think and I have taken many classes on Facilitating groups . The main thing in that is to step aside as you direct the group . It really gets tricky when you want to direct the group to your forgone conclusion you want them to get on board with . They got to think they as a group came up with it . It is like making them take ownership by there contribution . Not knowing the facilitator directed the move to conclusion . So what you are taught in the beginning classes is to be third party of the group and not to voice your opinion but to spur the crowds opinion . As you get to be better at it then you can learn to use the underhanded trickery of bringing peoples to conclusions that you desire. Making them all think they did it while getting your way . Once you got the mastery of that it is all smooth sailing and you are on the road to being a real A hole and you can kiss your B personification good buy my love . The A hole part is the part that slows most of us down
ALL couples have problems. My girlfriend and I are polar opposites on the MBTI scale. Me - INTP, her - ESFJ. But we manage. It just takes being aware of the other person's needs, as in any relationship. BTW - don't ever hope or expect someone will change. They are who they are. Accept them as such (after all, that's who you fell in love with) or move on. Just my own personal observation.
Introverts can get overwhelmed by too much social activity and need alone-time to decompress; however, what you are describing has nothing to do with introversion. Honestly, I am not sure what you are talking about... the concepts you are using don't apply to introversion or extroversion and that makes me think you are misdiagnosing some kind of issue.
I am not one to be told how an extrovert is... lol... I use to always be on here untill I got a small life back! haha! But I am (not self proclaimed) Queen of the extro! Only difference is, I'm an unstable extrovert... haha! I have nothing controled :-| THATS what drives him crazy... He's not a huge fan of many social gatherings.. He will make himself do it, but he wont last to long.. We have come up with compermizes and he will go do something with me, but we leave when he's ready to.. Even if i'm not even close to being done (unless I'm feeling crowded then I freak out lol) And Nietz, lol.. He's a trust issue one... but he is a great guy! Least he admits to being an asshole and says sorry! Hell, just tonight he got onto my FB and freaked out about me having a convo with someone, and he thought that there was something going on... Thankfully, he listend to what I had to say and stopped thinking that way.. We both have our issues and we are both working on them.. But it seems like theres just this block because of how I do put on an act or show for others.. He told me tonight that I'm a whole other person when we are around others adn it drives him crazy. I've never noticed, I just know that I'm louder around others, and quiet and relaxed around him.. Guess you could call the extroversion a persona..
My ex boyfriend was like that...he didn't want to go out, and he didn't want me to go out...and was paranoid I was out cheating...if he called me I'd tell him where I was and say, "Ya wanna come join me? buy you a beer..." but he wanted to be at home. I used to be a social night owl (heh-I'm posting this at 6 am local time after working until midnight, and no I have not slept yet...). He could not trust me. He thought I would cheat on him, he didn't approve of the way I did anything. I figured out cheating's just a lame-ass way out. If you want to dump someone, just dump them...I never fooled around on him, at one point I was thinking I wanted to marry him. The longer we went on the tighter he applied the nag-o-rama. By the time I dumped him and moved out I was miserable and losing clumps of hair.
The terms introvert and extrovert refer to the primary way a person orientates themselves to reality. An extrovert is more directly connected to external stimulus, whereas the introvert tends to use a filter after the stimulus. An introvert will get sensory overload quicker than an extrovert. This lower sensory overload threshold often causes the introvert to shut off the sensory systems to some degree (blank it out) and continue the data processing internally. The extrovert is less likely to get sensory overload and will use the stimulus as a mre direct unconscious trigger. One analogous way to explain this difference is to start with a input signal into a machine, that will do trigger the machine on command. If the microphone picking up the sound is way too sensitive, the input signal will appear to have noise leading to ambiguity. The noise will have to be processed first, by another program, to get the clean signal for the command.. On the other hand, if the microphone is set to properly handle that level of sound (green line and not red line) there is less need to run a secondary program to filter out noise. The extrovert is often able to react to reality in real time. Over time these reactions get finetuned to subtle changes in input. The introvert is more often in the habit of needing to filter out noise, so there is often more of a time delay. Based on this filtering, they can also fine tune and speed up the reaction delay. With respect to cultural reality, this extra filter step allows the introvert more time to think since noise can be subtle. This can be useful since humans are not always what they appear to be. Humans are not totally natural like nature. The extrovert will react in real time and may get caught easier by hidden noise. But in nature, the extrovert can react more naturally in real time, while the introvert tends to have more time delay inhibition.
