Why are people afraid of dying?

[CptBork]

I think you summed it up nicely. It's an evolutionary thing- if most members of a species were pretty much indifferent to death, how long do you think that species would last? Then there's the obvious pain aspect, which is especially a factor in today's world where fascists and religious whackjobs run the show and dying with dignity at a time of one's own choosing is basically outlawed (I've heard plentiful stories of suicidal people ending up tossed out to basically die in the cold, instead of the warm places where they could have done it in the first place but failed or got caught).

For me it's mostly about the pain factor (most of the easy ways to die are strictly controlled, and many other "easy" ways aren't nearly so easy as advertised by people who wouldn't be advertising them if they themselves had actually managed to successfully employ them). Also I wouldn't want a sociopathic doctor to lock me up somewhere for trying anything, and I personally still care enough about the well-being of my friends and family to stick around for their sakes, even though I think they've got some pretty nutty delusions about the importance of life in the big scheme.

 

[CptBork]

A related question for me is why so many suffering idiots choose to have children, when if they had an IQ over 100 they ought to know that those children are even more likely to suffer than the parents did. I consider it criminal to do that, tossing their kids out into nature's meatgrinder and hoping they win the lottery.

 

[KilljoyKlown]

I think you summed it up nicely. It's an evolutionary thing- if most members of a species were pretty much indifferent to death, how long do you think that species would last? Then there's the obvious pain aspect, which is especially a factor in today's world where fascists and religious whackjobs run the show and dying with dignity at a time of one's own choosing is basically outlawed (I've heard plentiful stories of suicidal people ending up tossed out to basically die in the cold, instead of the warm places where they could have done it in the first place but failed or got caught).

For me it's mostly about the pain factor (most of the easy ways to die are strictly controlled, and many other "easy" ways aren't nearly so easy as advertised by people who wouldn't be advertising them if they themselves had actually managed to successfully employ them). Also I wouldn't want a sociopathic doctor to lock me up somewhere for trying anything, and I personally still care enough about the well-being of my friends and family to stick around for their sakes, even though I think they've got some pretty nutty delusions about the importance of life in the big scheme.

If you really want to kill yourself, I don't think any outlawed drugs are going to be of much concern to you. Also, it shouldn't be much of a problem paying someone else to do it for you. If only it wasn't for all that socialized pressure on you not to do it. Now how many times have you heard that you really shouldn't care about what others think? Oh! I meant only those others that don't care about you.

 

[KilljoyKlown]

A related question for me is why so many suffering idiots choose to have children, when if they had an IQ over 100 they ought to know that those children are even more likely to suffer than the parents did. I consider it criminal to do that, tossing their kids out into nature's meatgrinder and hoping they win the lottery.

Yep! Being responsible for caring about keeping the species going is a dirty job, but someones got to do it and if that's not you, have a few kids that will.

 

[CptBork]

If you really want to kill yourself, I don't think any outlawed drugs are going to be of much concern to you.

Why not? You think it's as easy as going to the park and buying yourself a lethal dose of heroin? You'd have to have very trusted connections in order to make sure you were actually getting what's being advertised, which is very rarely the case when you buy it on the street. Most likely if you buy off an untrusted source, you'll get an inferior product with all kinds of junk added in to dilute it, and the result will be messing yourself up and not dying, a trip to the hospital from an unexpected side effect, and a punishment from the mental health system to top it off while trying to the cope with the fact you've now got HIV on top of all the things that made you suicidal in the first place. Plus you're more likely to get mugged by the dealer, and they won't want to sell you a lethal dose because they're not interested in being investigated as part of someone's suicide on top of all the other issues they're dealing with on a daily basis.

Also, it shouldn't be much of a problem paying someone else to do it for you.

Hahaha, are you kidding me? No one wants to spend the rest of their lives under criminal suspicion and forensic analysis for helping someone else end their life, again they have enough to worry about as is. And they don't need the extra guilt trip either, not like they don't have plenty of those hanging over their heads as is. If I went to a Hell's Angels bar and asked them to shoot me, they'd probably just jack my stuff, hold a knife to my balls while they take all my bank and credit card info, and then toss me out somewhere where I can't bother them anymore. Maybe in the US where practically any loony can get their hands on a handgun it would be different, but that ain't how it works in most of the civilized world.

If only it wasn't for all that socialized pressure on you not to do it. Now how many times have you heard that you really shouldn't care about what others think? Oh! I meant only those others that don't care about you.

Well their opinions do matter in fact, because they like to make people suffer all kinds of unspeakable mental and physical traumas in order to discourage it. We don't live in a libertarian hands off society, and even the people who don't give a shit about you will assert an ownership stake on your body. One of my closest friends had a friend who mangled their body in about 100 ways trying to die. The cops and ambulances kicked their door down, brought them into surgery, "saved their life" and turned them back out into the world like a handicapped Frankenstein monster. The guy made another attempt and now their family wants to toss them out into the cold, like this is somehow going to reduce their overall suffering and give them a real quality of life. Sorry mate, we live in a very fucked and very non-libertarian society. Your freedom to live and die on your own terms is only as effective as what 2 or 3 doctors and a court system which considers their testimony 100X more important than yours agrees it to be. The Church still controls our lives in more ways than you could ever imagine if you haven't seen what happens to people who try what you suggest.

 

[RichW9090]

I do not fear dying - it will be, I suspect, no different than going to sleep at night; you just never wake up. I don't particularly want to die a long, painful death, and I'd appreciate another couple of years to finish publishing all my research. But if I learned tomorrow that I had one week to live, I'm ready.

One a famous Buddhist monk lay dying in the monastery. One of his students, overcome with grief, baked him his favorite cake, knowing that the monk was close to death, and that it could well be his last meal. The monk, with a great deal of difficulty, turned on his side, took up his fork and began to eat very tiny bites of the cake - just a few. It was all he could manage. Seeing that his master wished to say a few last words, the student bent down and put his ear close to the Master's mouth, so as to not miss a single word.

The monk said, in a low, careful voice "My, this cake is delicious". Then he died.

That is how I hope to be able to go - savouring the cake of the moment, whatever it might be.

Rich

 

[Trooper]

We just had an incident here a few days ago. A woman attempted suicide by shooting herself in the chest with a colt python. A man found her covered in blood standing outside of her car in total disbelief. She got back into her car and said she was going to try to crash into another vehicle so he blocked the entrance with his vehicle. Most of her back was missing but she’s still alive. Some people have no fear of death. My biggest fear is leaving behind loved ones, but I think it all boils down to the fear of losing control. I was just watching this yesterday. It's sad.

Tony Nicklinson wants to die part 1

Part 2

 

[universaldistress]

Certainly you are not alone in having this particular issue and I remember one New Year's Eve discussion long into the night at a table evenly divided over 'pull the plug if I am on life support' and 'keep me pumping. Where there is life, there remains hope.'

Interesting that you do not claim to be afraid of 'death', rather you fear 'not being alive'.

Your choice of phrase intrigues me.

The experience of 'being alive' is unique unto each of us, and the concept of death may also mean different things to each of us.

I suppose the fear of not being alive stems from, I have more to do, I want to see my children grow up, and their children's children ad infinitum, I want to see where this is all going, I want to carry on. The act of dying however INTRIGUES me. I am a curious soul; probably a factor in mine inevitably meeting death sooner than I could have. Nevertheless, I am excited about what will happen after the act. I want to live as many years as possible, but when I die I want to go out conscious, no matter the affliction/cause. When I go I want to feel it for all its worth. If something follows then great, I want to feel the full transition. If nothing follows but a slowdown of experience and a hallucinatory shutdown of the mind I want to be experiencing. Whatever the way, I want to be there. So in that regard I'm looking forward to it. Not to say I won't go out kicking and screaming if someone else seeks to make the choice. If it comes to me well, I will take it . . . well.