Ethics of anonymous sex stories

[Jeeves]

Is it just my imagination, or are the windmills multiplying?

 

[DaveC426913]

They each think they're the only one and that they recognize themselves. They can't take it to court individually, but they can all be hurt individually.

And their hurt would be misplaced. They may think it's about them, but that's their inference. It probably isn't (a 25% chance in this example). More likely, the story is a mish mash of all encounters (and therefore sufficiently fictionalized).


There must be some allowance for an author's right to freedom of expression, otherwise, by your logic, it would always be wrong if any author included any aspects from their real life where they interacted with anyone else.

I do not believe that the world is as black-and-white as you make out, in terms of freedoms versus rights.

 

[DaveC426913]

Is it just my imagination, or are the windmills multiplying?

Sorry, I don't get the metaphor.

Perhaps you men more members are tilting at this?

 

[(Q)]

They each think they're the only one and that they recognize themselves. They can't take it to court individually, but they can all be hurt individually. That just makes A and even slimier sleaze. His ex-lovers should form a posse.

They won't get anywhere, sex is ubiquitous, most likely anyone who reads the authors book will connect with it in pretty much the same way as the authors ex-lovers and suddenly you have the "Spartacus" effect.

 

[Bells]

Incorrect, except as regards biographical writing, in which case the persons mentioned in the book should be asked for their consent before publication. If a writer of fiction has the requisite skill and talent, he or she can invent characters and situations that serve the thrust of a story, without using any real persons as a template, or recounting any events in which the author has participated. If a writer needs to "borrow" other people's experience, I'd rather they kept a diary than publish stories.

Are you suggesting the writer does not own their own experiences?

The writer is not borrowing from others. The writer is writing about their own experiences in a work of fiction.

You also did not respond to:

If A has sex with another person and re-enacts or copies what he or she did with the first person, would A be betraying that first person's most intimate experience?

If A asks person C to touch them the same way and in the same place, etc as A experienced with person B, would that be a betrayal of person B's most intimate experience?

 

[billvon]

So what I've been mulling over is this: if person A publishes a completely anonymous account of their sexual experiences with person B

Pretty simple flow chart here:

[Considering publishing my sexual experiences]
..................................|
.................................V
.........................[Bad idea]

 

[Seattle]

Apologies in advance if this isn't the right place for this kind of conversation, but this subforum seems to have tolerated sexuality-centered threads before, so I thought it'd be alright. Although this might be a comparatively frivolous matter to discuss, I've had it stuck in my brain for a while and wanted to find an ethics-centered forum like this where I could get some fresh perspectives on it.

So what I've been mulling over is this: if person A publishes a completely anonymous account of their sexual experiences with person B, likewise anonymous, but doesn't ask for B's consent before doing so, can that be considered to constitute a violation of B's sexual privacy? And, if person C then masturbates to said story, can C then be considered to have participated in some kind of indirect sexual violation or exploitation of B, given how C has acquired these details of B's intimate life without B's consent? Or does the anonymity present effectively eliminate those concerns of wrongdoing against B on A and C's part, making the situation different than if, say, A had posted naked/sexual photographs of B instead and C had masturbated to them?

The only violation might be a personal ethic that A owes to B. In other words if B were to read it and know that it was describing B then B would be right to be upset with A.

There is no violation to anyone by anyone reading this description. This isn't a good idea however for A to do this whether B learns of it or not.

If A is a novelist and uses some past personal experience to draw on in a novel and things are changed enough then there is no issue.

Just posting sexual experiences online seems to me to be in rather poor taste however.

 

[Bells]

When I personally think of "anonymous sex story", what I think of is "A writes on a publishing platform of some kind (the Internet, a magazine, etc.) about a sexual experience they personally had with B without sharing visual depictions of B or information about either party that could feasibly lead to identification of B" (although very generic information like age, first name, occupation, hair color or somesuch might still be involved).

Person B would be able to identify themselves in the piece if it was fairly distinct and particular and would be deemed an invasion of their privacy.

Anyone who knew both of them or their involvement could suspect the identity of person B if say the story is published within a particular timeline for example.

The moment people start writing about their own experiences and labelling it as such (or fail to depict that this is a fictional story or piece), suspicion will arise about those they had a sexual history with. Those people may feel as though their privacy has been invaded.

There is also the possibility of a murkier aspect and depending on the subject matter, can make the entire thing a horror story.

 

[James R]

if person A publishes a completely anonymous account of their sexual experiences with person B, likewise anonymous, but doesn't ask for B's consent before doing so, can that be considered to constitute a violation of B's sexual privacy?

As far as I can see, it doesn't become a violation of person B's privacy unless or until the element of anonymity is lost. If nobody can connect or is connecting persons A and B to the account in question, then how could person B's privacy be said to have been infringed?

And, if person C then masturbates to said story, can C then be considered to have participated in some kind of indirect sexual violation or exploitation of B, given how C has acquired these details of B's intimate life without B's consent?

I suppose that C is exploiting A's account to achieve C's own sexual gratification. Supposing A's account is an accurate account of B's sexual behaviour, then C is indirectly using part of B's personal history for C's own gratification. However, I think it would be tenuous to try to draw the conclusion that C is therefore exploiting B.

Or does the anonymity present effectively eliminate those concerns of wrongdoing against B on A and C's part, making the situation different than if, say, A had posted naked/sexual photographs of B instead and C had masturbated to them?

Don't tell me you can't tell the difference between a scenario in which B is anonymous and one in which B is clearly identifiable (?)
---

From a moral perspective, if you're concerned about B in this scenario, maybe a good place to start would be to ask whether, and in what way(s), B is harmed by the actions of A and/or C.

Suppose B becomes aware of A's account and is upset that A would publish that account without B's consent. In that case, B suffers an emotional harm. Since it was in A's power to prevent that harm, then A has probably acted immorally towards B. But that was not the question you asked. You asked whether A has violated B's privacy. As long as B remains unidentified and unidentifiable, then I can't see how A could be said to have violated B's privacy. In reality, of course, there may be many ways in which the identity of B might eventually come to light, even if A has every intention of maintaining the anonymity. If, for whatever reason, B's identity becomes known, then further moral questions will arise as to the extent of A's moral culpability in publishing the account without the consent of B.

In C's case, according to your scenario, C is merely using the account for the purposes of his or her own sexual satisfaction. I can't see any way in which C's masturbation could harm B, at least as long as B is unaware of it. C has no way of establishing that the account is factual rather than fictional, so I don't see how C could be blamed for violating or exploiting B, unless you are of the opinion that anybody who uses pornography for their own personal sexual gratification is commiting some kind of moral wrong merely by doing that act.