I have a deep and severe depression, I have been bullied, abandoned, and abused my whole life. My friends have ego, they get mad when I criticize their works and art. But I am a Sherlock Holmes, I am blunt, I am autist, I only speak things as I see it, I have no ego filter often times. So last night I "embraced the void" as I hate light during those times, I must shut off all lights in the home as I imagine myself becoming nothing but darkness. I lay on the bed but it puts stress on my neck, interrupting my void calling. I then laid on the couch, closing my eyes seeing the multicolor spectacle dancing around inside my own mind. I started to focus, on the sweet embrace of lady death. I started to ask, "What am I"? I realized my fate was sealed and inevitable, like everyone else, I would die. This filled me with relief, awe, and peaceful wonder. I asked "What am I?" "What am I?" And I started to study or focus on what I was. "I am nothing" I am nothing I said and repeated and smiled, I am nothing. I said minus the personality, memories and bs, what am I? I asked "Am I a field. a Consciosness field." "Am I a Spirit?" "Am I Love?" Well the answer is I have no idea. But I believe every human being ought to do this ritual of escaping their ego, and truly focusing on their own death and What they truly are. only then can Truth be found.