There at the birth...

Discussion in 'Conspiracies' started by Gawdzilla Sama, May 22, 2018.

  1. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    ... of a new conspiracy theory. One of my cousins is now firmly convinced that the Internet doesn't exist. The providers are faking it to get money for something that is really free. He's "looking into" various ways to get connected without having to "plug in".

    On due consideration I encourage him. If he actually finds out how to do that I'll offer to file a patent for him. His name might be spelled exactly like mine at some point, but we're cousins, so it stays in the family.
     
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  3. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Is he convinced that it doesn't exist? Or that he doesn't have to pay for it through a service provider?

    He may be technically correct about the second one.
     
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  5. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    He's gone whole hog. We don't need satellites, etc. Big WiFi uses our money to launch those satellites for other purposes. Same with local ISPs, they're a con because the whole system is accessed through a series of commands (and he couldn't explain how that works) to the "global cloud of WiFi." No infrastructure needed.
     
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  7. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    So ... we don't need the satellites - the ones that create the global cloud of WiFi - that he plans to use to access it...

    Is it just me, or is his own logic faulty?
     
  8. gmilam Valued Senior Member

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    I've always suspected there was witchcraft involved.
     
  9. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    He was homeschooled.
     
  10. origin In a democracy you deserve the leaders you elect. Valued Senior Member

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    Ohhh, I see. Well if he is a good person that is all that really counts. We are all ignorant, it is just a matter of degree...
     
  11. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    He IS deeply religious, so that's certain.
     
  12. Michael 345 Bali in Nov closer Valued Senior Member

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    Hogwarts or Unseen University home program?

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  13. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    Ilvermorny, ya bloody anglophile.
     
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  14. Sarkus Hippomonstrosesquippedalo phobe Valued Senior Member

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    Just to clarify, is this you suggesting we need satellites for wi-fi, or you expressing what this other person seems to think? 'Cos it seems to me that this person is correct in as much as we don't need satellites for the Internet. Where, exactly, do satellites come into it? Yes, some providers might provide satellite internet, but the vast majority of us... all very much ground-based systems.
     
  15. Michael 345 Bali in Nov closer Valued Senior Member

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    I've never abused young fish

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  16. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    (Visual pun.)
     
  17. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Yeah. I made that inference, as part of this "global Wifi cloud".
     
  18. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    They wouldn't be needed if Cuz is correct in his claim that the magnetosphere generates WiFi. He hasn't gotten back to me on exactly what parts of the infrastructure would be unneeded, "I need to look at that closer". That's a deflection flag, btw.
     
  19. gmilam Valued Senior Member

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    Find out the IP address of the magnetosphere's gateway. I'd love to do away with my modem/router.
     
  20. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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  21. Gawdzilla Sama Valued Senior Member

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    I'll ask. Not sure of the reply, however. He advised me to stay completely away from anything connected to DARPA. Evidently the government's cameras can see me scratch my balls.
     
  22. Michael 345 Bali in Nov closer Valued Senior Member

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    I've heard god is into cloud computer storage in a big way

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  23. Michael 345 Bali in Nov closer Valued Senior Member

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    Your visual pun is merely click bait

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