So this baby seal walks into a club...

Discussion in 'Earth Science' started by Roman, Apr 6, 2005.

  1. Roman Banned Banned

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    Rest of joke

    I thought about titleing this thread
    Killng Baby Seals: Who has a good reason for caring?
    But that just sounds confrontational.

    Other than their cuteness, why does anyone care about seal clubbing? There are other, albeit less public friendly, animals out their that need our protection, too!

    One more joke.

    So a seal walks into a bar, and the bar tender asks, "What'll it be?"
    The seal replies, "Anything but a Canadian Club."
     
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  3. cotton Resident Pirate Registered Senior Member

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    I dont think killing innocent seals is good. I like animals. But I do get the joke.
     
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  5. Roman Banned Banned

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    What about killing innocent cows?
    Aren't all animals pretty much innocent?
     
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  7. Dr Lou Natic Unnecessary Surgeon Registered Senior Member

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    Not arabs, club them instead. Right roman? I'm assuming you have no good reason to care about the clubbing of baby arabs, so you're all for it then?

    Besides, think of the polar bears, they have enough trouble finding food as it is and starvation is a common cause of death. How would you like it if canadians went into your mcdonalds and took all the quarter pounders?
    Leaving you to trek around from mcdonalds to mcdonalds, in the cold, only to find that all the mcdonalds' had been cleaned out by canadians.

    Face it- there's alot more baby arabs, nothing relies on them for food and yeah, they're not as cute as baby seals.
     
  8. Hapsburg Hellenistic polytheist Valued Senior Member

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    no thier not.
    but thats not the point.
    animals are innocent and all when they're babies, but who knows if that seal isn't going to bite some guy's groin off?
    who knows?
    better to be safe than sorry, eh?
     
  9. cotton Resident Pirate Registered Senior Member

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    Please tell me you are being sarcastic...
     
  10. Roman Banned Banned

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    For the longest time I thought Lou was the world's best cynic, but it turns out he's just Australian. Which means he's horribly rascist. Horribyl, horribly so.
     
  11. Naomi [oxiglycodextrosium] Registered Senior Member

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    186
    How about innocent plants?

    How dare we slaughter the innocent ears of corn for our selfish gastronomical purposes. We should just develop a method of chemically producing glucose from hydrogen, carbon, and oxygen and never kill anything ever again.

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    Get a grip. We're at the top of the food chain. We call the shots now.
     
  12. Chairman_meow Registered Senior Member

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    I have a theory as to why we (humans) think little animals are so cute, and why they give us a fuzzy feeling.

    It is because in an evolutionary/king of the jungle sense, if you saw one in the wild you'd be like...."sweet, free food, i don't have to kill that big motherfuckin seal."

    .........and so on..

    get my point?

    yeh. i'm right.
     
  13. Dr Lou Natic Unnecessary Surgeon Registered Senior Member

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    Yeah I know.
    You were way off with that, I'm embarrassed for both of us.

    Now, what's your good reason for not-clubbing baby arabs? You're all eager and keen to get out there and smash some baby seal skull, but the little baby awabs make you all mushy inside... what gives?
    What's the logical explanation? What is your good reason for caring?
     
  14. Roman Banned Banned

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    Not until you give me a good reason why clubbing baby seals matters. An aesthetic doesn't count as a good reason, either.

    I don't really have a good reason. Babies are pretty worthless to me. Maybe if the families cared or something, maybe? I dunno. I guess we have to think of the children, you know.
     
  15. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

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    24,066
    Human babies give off pheromones that prevent violence from parents (and adults) until the age of 2. Not that this is a fool proof system of course.

    I suggest that seals develop similar pheromones that can influence humans. Then evolution will have solved the problem for us.
     
  16. Roman Banned Banned

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    Could we put that phermone on our soldiers and cops to prevent them from being murdalized?
    What about tigers or zombies? Would it have a similar effect?
     
  17. kenworth dude...**** it,lets go bowling Registered Senior Member

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    dont try to rationalize it,part of being a normal human is to value human life over other kinds.i would rather club a thousand seals to death than kill a person,a seal isnt going to go out and change the world for the better.little bastards.
     
  18. Roman Banned Banned

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    I think I'd rather kill one human than club a thousand seals. Killing seals can't changes anything. Killing people can.
     
  19. kenworth dude...**** it,lets go bowling Registered Senior Member

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    really?i find that very odd.i mean if it was a choice between killing a thousand seals and killing a very bad person i could see your point,but if it was just a random...
     
  20. Baron Max Registered Senior Member

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    Well, perhaps, since y'all are out to kill things, why not kill the people who USE the products from the baby seals? If there were no market, there'd be no seals killed.

    Baron Max
     
  21. Hapsburg Hellenistic polytheist Valued Senior Member

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    who...cares about...friggin' seals?
    they're....stupid animals that are eventually dangerous.
    seriously, i read a news article that some zookeeper was training with a seal, and one day he walks into the pen, and the dang thing comes up and bites his groin. just.....crunch! the guy was holding a fish, and the thing chomps on his nuts.
    that is a f*bleep*ed-up seal.

    they are dangerous little beastards.
     
  22. Dreamwalker Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    To live ist to kill, as long as it is in adequate boundaries I do not really care.

    EDIT:

    Okay, this is just a little to short I think, let me elaborate a bit...

    Why should it be wrong to kill a seal? As was said before, loads of other animals are getting killed every day and no one really cares about it. (except those people who cry about the death of everything that has a shadow...)

    Is clubbing a seal cruel? Maybe, but I do not really think that those fish on the hooks that I pull out of the water look that comfortable either. But little seals are so cute, aren't they? Need to protect little cute fluffy animals, slimy, fat or ugly creatures meanwhile can go to hell, right? No, seals are better suited for photos, and they have this cuteness factor that makes people care for all kinds of things.

    Just a way of hyprocrisy or ignorance in my eyes. I can understand that some species are protected to safe them from utter annihilation, but if the killing is conducted in reasonable borders, as I said in the beginning, then I do not really care if it's seals or rats that die.
     
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2005
  23. Naomi [oxiglycodextrosium] Registered Senior Member

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    Hey, I'd gladly kill both the thousand seals and the human. I'd gladly kill anyone, because killing is just so much fun. The blood, the squealing, the screaming, the pain, the shudder of life leaving the body ... you feel it all. It's so great.
     

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