New "Personality" Thread stressing my responsibility

edit: do not read this post. Start at page 4 or 5 preferably the post from invert nexus; should you read the other pages you'll hate it. It gets interesting from there, for the ... most part.

the last one failed,my responsibility to the thread immitated my personality to suit. however this thread in it i intend to figure out what personality is again once again through myself, though this time hopefully to figure out about individuality as is "norm"

I seem to have a problem. I constant read books right now i'm reading buddha books. Buddhism with an Attitude is what i'm eating right now.

And so, I would like to say that I think people when seeing me read may say, oh, cool, he's tryin to read and he's reading something good for himself. The opposite almost holds true...

I don't seem to have care for other people. I have care for them yes, just trying to say what is wrong with me.
I don't seem to be able to read the book with intent at full practice, more as a way to get out of internal practice

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I suppose what i'm trying to describe may be something of interest to say the very least, of most maybe a lot of people even.
I don't like the idea of it, and think i'm insane, but as I said in this thread i'm going to take the responsibility.

So, what makes a person normal?
If we define normal as in bounds with society so to say, is able to withold relationships and conversations and have a job, mixing with other people and such and not acting bizare appears as to what is normal for society.

First things first:
Normal people have feature where they are able to be emotional and supported in their fea-spec to care for others.
Why is this so? Why am I different?

By this it appears that personality (or is it just me) is something deep.

In this thread i'm hoping to come and understand what personality is by my situation, in relation with other, people.

 

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brent:

what is it you are trying to be?

are you trying to figure out personality in this thread or are you trying to figure out yourself in this thread?

 

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'person' from Greek 'persona' means bascially 'mask'.te mask you is wearing.

so, whatmask ARE you wearing?
beter...what MASKS are you wearing?

are you aware of them'?

has any got STUCK?

an old saying goes...'careful of tat expression. if wind changes it'll stay with you'---'
some pople when they reach a certian age GET a look/a mask. if someone say bout 40-60 etc has got cynical outlook/persona, ten it shows in their face, manner etc

see pople who see comical side, have sense of humour. see their laugh-lines. usually have alive-lookin eyes demeanour. maks YOU wanna lugh too once tey get going

oter faces hqve teir own stories to tell

wht we want to stay clear of isssss....rigidity!!!. AN EXAMPLE:...the spittin hate-filled racist persona

 

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In relation to me.
I am trying to figure out so I can figure out myself.

There are a lot more threads i've created similar to this: "what is REQUIRED for stability", Wittgenstein and life, a lot, all trying one thing.

The last personality thread came close as far as actually describing what I want to describe. But as usual failed and left my responsibility hanging where it usually is.

 

I like this. You could say everyone wears a mask, I guess.

An amplified awareness, with insight, and understanding, but not understanding

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Something strange I'm hoping to describe... something like this in the thread.

Check.

Yes this is good.

People go their own ways and develope certain traits. My story to tell is one that wishes to have a certain face, that perhaps does, that, it is gone though. Staying with my family is making me retarded. I am a victem and a crazy.

Agreed. But with me everything is critical.

I guess we're talking about me

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Not much is universal.

 

what do you not understand?

 

I want to be HEARD.
The things I say UNDERSTOOD---

 

who does not understand?

 

i agree with much of what QQ says pretty much all of it and particularly that only you know how to live your life. no one can or should tell you this this and this.

 

Huh?
I guess me I don't know what wrong with me I didn't get the rest of your post?

 

you said exista, that staying with your family is making you retarded, and that you ARE a very critical persona

do you have a personal space at home? a room you can go to as a kind of sanctuary?

is you also very critical of YOUR self/persona?

do you feel ultra self-conscious?

 

last post got eaten by the forum reply monster

 

do you mean you dont understand yourself?

 

Brent, I must admit I am a little surprised that you chose to publish our private discussions in this forum thread. Not exactly disappointed but a little concerned that you may not be aware of how my letters may effect other readers who may not be aware of the context or perspectives involved.

On the other hand, the notion of an "amplifed awareness leading to ultra self consciousness" is worth bringing out and discussing any way. So I am not going to get too upset by the publication of our private discussion.
However in future please ask first OK?

I have often promoted the view that psychic trauma caused by a heightened awareness is a essential part of most conditions that are commonly referred to as psychiatric illnesses. I have also promoted the notion that a persons experiences should always be considered as credible even if the interpretations of that experience may be confused.

However in the context of conventional thought these notions are unsuported and have a potential of confusing the desparate reader even more. So I avoid publically discussing in any great detail to avoid confusing those that are most vulnerable. The thing is there is a fine line to be tread when promoting these things especially when there is not the conventional research and evidencial support to give them any real credibility.

This doesn't mean that what I have written to you in private is invalid or wrong, only that if published publically they may be taken out of context to the detriment of the reader and diminish and restrict how I respond to your PM's in the future.

 

There is no such thing as a 'psychiatric illness'!

 

OK, my mistake, maybe I should have used the words "What is commonly referred to as psychiatric illness".

Which is certainy what I meant. Better?

see edit in orange

 

existabrent - I have seen nothing in any of your posts (and I have read a surprising number) that dissaudes me from my initial diagnosis of your condition: you are an intelligent male teenager. This is, indeed, a distressing condition, but it is one that will pass.

 

Yeah Ophiolite, try explaining that to my docter (in the past).
At least it isn't very optmistic. Maybe too optimistic! I posted a lot of stuff here in the thread, and I am going to post more.
So.

 

Surely no one can or should tell me "this this and this"; however this this and this is the only thing i'm asking for.
I'm not asking for that, or this, but this this and this.
That surely makes some sence.

In every vain I don't think anyone here understands me.
I've tried to explain it before.

It is like it is hard to get me to cry because I want to i mean when I start to feel better I cry and that makes me feel normal again (I'm not ENTIRELY sure about THAT, but still); so I think i'm caught up ... I've said this in the mental health and the existentialists threads a lot; in that i'm trying or caught up trying something that I should be trying and stuff. That it is hard to get me to be normal because of a bunch of stuff.

I don't really know, but I would like it to be clear.

Yes I don't really understand myself, ellion

 

Unfortunately... yes.

I have my room, but no where is sancutary never am I happy.

It seems like I have to be because I have no ability for anything.

Yes.