Is Canada the greatest country of all time?

There is so much that Canada has contributed to the world, that to comprehend it would be a practice of futility.

For instance, in the field of science, Canada easily has all the greatest scientists of all time:

Alexander Graham Bell.

Of course, Canada succeeds in other fields aswell, such as pop culture:

Celine Dion(sp) - Universally regarded as the greatest singer of all time! Sum 41 - Universally regarded as the greatest punk-rock band of all time. Just go and listen to their first album if you don't believe me. Avril Lavigne - Not as good as SUM 41, but she's a gril and in being a girl, I think it's safe to say that she beats any American punk act. Bryan Adams - The greatest guitar player of all time! Go and listen to "Everything I Do, I do it for you"... The song will make you cry, and break your heart with profound emtion! In fact, the feelings and emotions tied to listening to Bryan Adams is like witnessing the birth of a still born baby, yet, simtaneously, being able to watch it play in the next life on IMAX.

And let's not forget our great indie bands:

The Beatles - Universally regarded as the most innovative, creative, and important band of all time.

Boards of Canada - "Music Has The Right To Children" got into the top 100 pitchfork albums of the 90s.

And as for Canadian movie stars, I have two words fo ya: 'UMA THURMAN!'

Not only that, we created penicillin. Without it, BILLIONS, THAT'S RIGHT, BILLIONS, of people would have been subjected to deadly diseases such as bacteria.

WHO'S THE ONLY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD TO HAVE A NATIONAL HEALTH SYSTEM? YES, THAT'S RIGHT, CANADA...

Oh, incedently, when I say that the Beatles were Canadian, I mean that Paul McCartney was Canadian. There is a theory that in 1966 Paul McCartney was killed in a motor bike accident! Naturally, when a commodity like the beatles is damaged it is commercially imperative that you repair it immediately. The three remaining Beatles were threatened with death to keep the incident private. Meanwhile, the record company desperate to find someone who looked like Paul McCartney had no other option but to look North to Canada! And needless to say, they were successful. The new Paul McCartney settled in nicely, and was the reason why the Beatles, from 1966 onwards, were able to produce the greatest albums ever: Revolver, Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts club Band, MMT, The White Album, Let It Be, and Abbey Road. The new Canadian, in other words, brought the Beatles out of their primitive rock Buddy Holly rip off music, and turned them into the most innovative band in rock history. You can find solid proof that the original Paul McCartney died in 1966 by analysing Beatle album covers and lyrical content of their songs! There's also countless websites!

The broacast of radio signals were first recieved in New Found Land! Imagine a world without radio, if you dare!

On top of all that, there is a supernatural element to our greatness. "There is mounting proof that angels originated from Canada," says Dan Brown, writer of The Da Vinci Code! Of course, if you're not religious then you're just going to reject this as bullshit. Ok, fine with me, I don't want to get dragged into a discussion about theology. So with that, we move onto the last reason why Canada's so great:

CANADA IS LOVED WORLDWIDE. In fact, Canada is so loved that tourists will put on Canadian accents just so they can get treated like kings! This is common convention especially with American tourists, since they're sooo hated!

So, with this, which I hope is a very convincing argument, you will vote yes.

 

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=( i wish i was canadian then i wouldn't have this stigmata of US over my head =(

 

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I'd retire in Canada. mmm...

that or Alaska.
or somewhere cold.

and the health care thing would be an added bonus.

 

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Why should I move to Canada?

I like it here in Germany, and when I grow tired of it, I´ll move to Norway or Sweden, just as good as Canada, if not better.

 

Canada's got health system.

 

And is it true that people don't lock their doors in Canada?

 

Scandanavia has social wellfare states ( = Healthcare)

 

No. That's Canadian propaganda to belittle the USAs sense of security!

 

no..that's micheal moore propaganda about Canada

 

Good for Canada, Germany has one too.

 

Canada...?

HAH...!!!

What'd you do to even get a computer there...?
Commit tax evasion, or just steal it...?

No... Wait... I know... You used the profits from your hydroponic pot farm ! :m:

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Speaking of taxes...
Your exhorbitant rates must be why I see busloads of your inmates - I mean - "citizens" at our local malls, shopping centers, liquor stores & smoke shops every weekend... even with your pathetically undevalued "Loonies", they can still get what they need at comparative bargain prices here in the nation that's the sole reason your parasitic socialist wasteland punctuated by a few semi-civilzed enclaves can so much as continue to exist...!
[but god only knows they've plenty of reasons to drink heavily...!]


errr... You're actually taking pride in Aviril Lavigne...?

Man... you must really be in a bad way...
Have you been smoking the "produce" from your "farm" again...?

I'll grant you, she looks quite cute with that half-pouty little look of bratty "anger" on her teeny-bopper mug... but once she opens it to screech her ill-reasoned out pronunciamentos on life, love, and petite little bouts of "anguish", I start thinking one thing and one thing only...
Ball Gag...!

Celine's got some decent pipes... that's true...
But she'd most likely be wailing away on some obscure hog plantation somewhere were it not for The Greatest Nation On Earth, where a person of talent is rewarded with the only thing in this world which matters more than the least of several damns... you guessed it, Comrade Back Bacon... Ameridollars...!

These "Sum 41" guys, I can't really comment on, since I have not lowered myself to the stygian depths listening to them would undoubtedly require...
Sufficient to say that I am almost certain that the word "crap" could be applied enerringly to the tripe which is assuredly all they are capable of...

The cannabinoid fog must be getting to you... as you have failed utterly to mention a couple or 3 of meritiorious minstrels which we in The Greatest Nation On Earth have rewarded similarly to your peasant chanteuse Celine...


Neil Young...
A true mad poet and bard...
Granted, he must have been into the 'shroom bag a time or 473 to have produced some of those lyrics, not to mention wrenching out some of what he claims are "guitar solos"... but nonetheless a true maverick spirit whom your unwashed backwoods collective masquerading as a nation simply could not contain...!

Rush...
Yowza...!
From corny X-mas yodelings with your 2 comedic clods of days gone by , the "McKenzie Brothers", to skull-splitting, yet intricate ultra-jams, this trio towers above agglomerations of palsied mendicants like "Sum 41"...! [ I presume... and how can one not... heh]
Moreover, Alex Lifeson's masterful guitar work makes rank amateurish hacks like Bryan Adams appear as though playing with 2 feet which have been transplanted onto the opposite legs by an inept neurosurgeon...!
[Probably due to the 4 month wait to have the procedure performed in one of your oh-so-excellently provided for gub'mint hospitals...!]

Gordon Lightfoot...
Classic minstrel and storyteller...
Someone capable of praising Avaril Lavigne is almost certainly incapable of appreciating the mellow, yet poignant talent of this barritoned baladeer [is it just me, or does "Avaril" sound like an OTC headache medicine...?]


Oh... Then you mentioned miss Uma...
hmmm... I suppose she'd do in a pinch.
Seems rather scrawny and undernourished to me most of the time, though...
I thought you people ate doughnuts and back bacon and "poutine" all the time...?
We got Tim Horton's shops all over the damned place hereabouts...
mmm...! Think I'll dash out and grab an order of "Timbits" for breakfast...!
How'd this one make it through those gauntlets...?
Besides, she lacks 2 key endowments we of The Greatest Nation On Earth value almost as much as money - which is why we made them available for purchase if a gal is so inclined... hee hee hee hee....!

Just look at that other gal who escaped your socialist gulag hell on earth - I mean - emigrated to Hollywood to do real acting, like posing nude and flouncing around in a none-too-concealing red bathing suit...
Once we got her all "tricked out" with the proper "equipment" she became a "somebody" in this world, instead of just another poster girl for one of your over-rated beer producers...
[I have drank the product of Sir John LaBatt's effort, my dear Christmas... and I have found it wanting...]

Lastly....
I feel you have mistaken a great outpouring of pity from the other woefully inferior cessholes forced to scrabble about in the shadow of the supremely divinesque and towering colossus of The Greatest Nation On Earth as some form of "universal love"...
"Misery loves company" - as the saying goes... and you have undoubtedly been embraced by your fellow sub-men as especially destitute sufferers...
After all, you poorest of unfortunates must exist directly adjacent to The Greatest Nation On Earth... Living each and every day with the heady aroma of its brobdignian grandeur wafting across your border to suffuse your ramshackle and often near-collapsing coalition of clearly clueless incoherents with the illusion that you too are something vaguely resembling an important nation...

And without so much as a wall across it like we put up between us and Mexico...


Truly do I grieve for thee...

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Ahhh! pro US propaganda, run for cover and close your ears!!! The merciless capitalists attack with their sweet tinged voices, pronouncing the doom that sounds like salvation.

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*listen to Killjoy in awe* waaaau Where do i sign up for US citersenship

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Stand back in line buddy. I was first in line to sign up.

 

You know, I just saw an add for a green card tombola, just wait till I win one.

But wait, then I would have to pay great amounts to study at a university and the state would not give me money and I would have no health insurance...

But I could drive a car that is really big, has a crappy performance and uses imense amounts of gas, and would never be allowed to be used on German soil.

And I could by me some guns, and use them on me or my neighbors when I finally snap...

And all those entertaining religious sects that are forbidden were I live...

Yes, I definitely need a green card.

 

hah you never get anywhere, i bribe to person in charge and skip the line

 

Fie and Away, naysayer...!!!

A "gift" wings its way to you from The Greatest Nation On Earth...!!!

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It will keep you all warm and snuggly...

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Good for me that there are some WW II bunkers nearby that supposedly can withstand a nuclear attack. Just about 5 kilometers to go.

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Canada , home of the 60 percent income tax rate, where everyone pays to get good health.

 

60%? Not bad, depending on the income, we have up to 52 here in Germany. But only if you earn more than 54000 Euros a month...

And you have to pay for the unemployed as well, and the education and so on.