What do you think?

Maybe god is an apple mania, so he want all the apples, so it is a sin to eat his apple?

you are gay.

Soooooooooooo gaaay.

:bugeye: I concur... wtf?

lol, try pondering what god tastes like. He's perfect, so does he taste like chocolate or like cheesecake? maybe he changes flavor.
and if he's perfect, shouldn't he be a hot sexy chick instead of an old nasty guy?

what are you talking about; "He's" a spirit.

and if he's perfect, shouldn't he be a hot sexy chick instead of an old nasty guy?

Now we're talking :p ... What were they thinking when they wrote the bible? Then again... I bet there'd be a lot more theists around if god was a hot chick that tasted like chocolate. :rolleyes:

LOL...then even i would go to church, just to see the portraits. .... ROFLMAO... i wonder what kind of portraits they'd have...

Hahah... think about it though, you'd want to get into heaven, but at the same time you'd have to resist temptation... all of the men would be going to hell :D

LOL. Cherry cheesecake Cheri, we could call her.

http://www.forumspile.com/Thread-Gay-Simmons-02.gif

Hahah... think about it though, you'd want to get into heaven, but at the same time you'd have to resist temptation... all of the men would be going to hell

Women are hornier, they just don't show it. ;)

Soooooooooooo gaaay.

Aren't we all just "happy" people :D


you are gay

Takes one, to know one. ;) LOL...

Forgive, just blowing offsteamfromwork!

Godless

Are you talking about the Adam and Eve myth? Because the fruit involved wasn't actually an apple.

Happy? Me? You must not know me. :D

P.S. Blow, baby.

Are you talking about the Adam and Eve myth? Because the fruit involved wasn't actually an apple.

That's right, it was the fruit of knowledge, ie, sentience, awareness consciousness. I see this myth as an anology to the transformation from ape to man and it makes me think that its roots are in science and far far older than most people realise.

Yes, but even in the story, I think the kind of fruit was changed to suit European readers.

Probably, considering that apples are not native to the Middle East.

I think apple was rare, but now there're too many apples, so it is not a sin to eat apple nowadays.

you SHOULD eat apples. They're very good for you.
Maybe that's why god doesn't like apples, they keep you healthy, delay suffering and dying. lol, sadistic god.

From a biblical perspective it would be the opposite. god seemingly does not like fruit at all. Look at how he reacts to Cain when he offers him fruit. Further to that, none of the offerings he demands contain fruit. There's dead animals, dead animals and more dead animals. There's some smelly incense stuff and some more dead animals, but there's not one banana or apple in sight.

god seemingly just gets off on burning flesh. He mentions his love for burning meat 17 times in leviticus, and 18 times in numbers. In leviticus 26 he starts explaining the curses he will put on people if they disobey him. He starts off with light things like having animals rip people apart, plagues and stuff like that.. Right near the end of the list - if people continue to disobey him after all of that he says he will no longer be pleased by the aroma/will refuse to smell it.

It's safe to say god takes his burning cow flesh smell seriously.

So could it be that he sendt his son down to earth to die because he'd gotten bored of animal sacrifices? I mean, having your place smell like burned livestock for 4000 years can do that to you.

Now we're talking :p ... What were they thinking when they wrote the bible? Then again... I bet there'd be a lot more theists around if god was a hot chick that tasted like chocolate. :rolleyes:- I think we should pursue this line of thought further, cause I can't remember reading anything in the Bible suggesting God is not a hot chick who tastes like chocolate.

So could it be that he sendt his son down to earth to die because he'd gotten bored of animal sacrifices?

It's possible. Many christians claim that the, (albeit false), sacrifice of jesus meant the end of animal sacrifice. I like the smell of a cooked beefburger just like any other man, but must admit it would start getting to me after a few thousand years - especially the amount he demanded.

There was the - burnt offering, the sin offering, the guilt offering, the ordination offering and the fellowship offering. All of these involved killing a cow or ten.. and then there were the festivals that required a few more hundred slaughtered livestock. And let it be said that god would not accept just any cow - hell no, he demanded the best of the best cow. The ultimate prize beef on offer. You even had to check an animals testicles before setting it alight:

"Lev 22:24 You must not offer to the lord an animal whose testicles are bruised, crushed, torn or cut."

He's a fussy old bugger.

That's right, it was the fruit of knowledge, ie, sentience, awareness consciousness. I see this myth as an anology to the transformation from ape to man and it makes me think that its roots are in science and far far older than most people realise.

It wasn't the fruit of the "Tree of Knowledge".
It was the fruit of the "Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil".
There is a significant difference.

And no, it had nothing to do with apples at all.

meaning they didn't know it was wrong to eat the fruit, as they didn't know evil.
Stupid god...

Semon, this thread is HILARIOUS!! I love it.

Men made story to blame womans.