L
Leetha
Guest
Where do Eskimos go to the toilet? Igloos look too small to include a bathroom, but if they went outdoors at night they might be eaten by a polar bear which would be attracted by the smell.
Eskimos live in houses and use snowmobiles. They still hunt but they don't live in igloos.
But they used to. They probably had a corner that they did it in .
ah, the great apostraphe album yes?The perfect segue into Frank Zappa lyrics:
Where do Eskimos go to the toilet? Igloos look too small to include a bathroom, but if they went outdoors at night they might be eaten by a polar bear which would be attracted by the smell.
Report from Emily Waddell
Sleeping in an igloo really is an experience! Last night, Me (Emily), Charlie, Will, Josh, Ems, Ed ,Sarah and Phil allhad the privilge of spending a night out with all out kit! I waas so excited and couldn't wait to do the thin that really wolr set ooff the whole experience. We were not allowed to eat befroe hand bcause we went for the whole effect in cookin in the igloo! We walked over to the spot and I know I was pleased to se it still standing! We placed every thing insed and clambered in caking sure no one put snow into the tent or there really would be trouble with Phi! How many people cansay that they ahve slept in an igloo? It was amazing and Charlie and I are very pleased taht we didn't talk or giggle for too long! Going to the toilet was a totally new expereince but I'lll leave it at that!... Again, another memory that will stck with me forever. Absolutely fantastic!
The perfect segue into Frank Zappa lyrics:
(well, right about that time people
A fur-trapper (who was strictly from commercial)
Had the unmitigated audacity to jump up from behind my igloo (peekaboo) )
And he started into whippin on my favorite baby seal
With a lead-filled snowshoe)
I said, with a
Lead-
Filled
With a lead filled snowshoe
He said, peekaboo
I said, with a
Lead-
Filled
With a lead filled snowshoe
He said, peekaboo
He went right upside the head of my favorite baby seal
He went whap with a lead-filled snowshoe, and
He hit him on the nose and hit him on the fin, and he
That got me just about as evil as an eskimo boy can be. so I bent down
And I reached down, and I scooped down and I gathered up a generous
Mitten-ful of the deadly yellow snow
The deadly yellow snow, from right there where the huskies go!
Whereupon I proceeded to take that mittenful of the deadly yellow snow
Crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous
Circular motion hitherto unknown to the people of this area, but destined
To take the place of the mudshark in your mythology
Here it goes,the circular motion, now rub it!
(here fido)
And then
In a fit of anger
I pounced
And I pounced again
Great googly moogly!
I jumped up and down on the chest of the him
I injured
The fur trapper
Well he was very upset, as you can understand
And rightly so, because the
Deadly yellow snow crystals had
Deprived him of his
Sight
And he stood up, and he looked around, and he said
I cant see
I cant see
Oh, woe is me
I cant see
Well.....you know
I cant see
Nothin
He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my right eye
He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my other eye
And the husky wee-wee
I mean the doggie wee-wee
Has blinded me
And I cant see
Temporarily
Well, the fur-trapper stood there, with his arms outstretched across the
Frozen white wasteland, trying to figure out what he was going to do about
His deflicted eyes. and it was at that precise moment that he remembered
And ancient eskimo legend, wherein it is written (on whatever it is that
They write it on up there) that if anything bad ever happens to your eyes
As the result of some sort of conflict with anyone named
Nanook,
The only way you can get it fixed up is to go
Trudging across the tundra
Mile after mile
Trudging across the tundra
Right down to the parish of st. alphonzo