Ho! Ho! Ho!!!

T

truestory

Registered Senior Member
One particular Christmas season, a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip... But there were problems everywhere... Four of his elves got sick and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, so, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then, Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit... This stressed Santa even more. When he went out to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out - who knows where? More stress...

Santa tried to keep going... He began to load the sleigh, when all of a sudden, one of the boards cracked and a big bag of toys fell to the ground - scattering the toys all over the place. Frustrated, and in need of a break, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor and there was nothing to drink! In his frustration, Santa accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces - all over the kitchen floor. To make matters even worse, when Santa went to get the broom, he found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from...

Just then, the doorbell rang (Ding-dong!)... Santa cussed (!@#$%!!!) on his way to the door. When he opened the door, he saw a little angel with a GREAT BIG Christmas tree.

The angel said, VERY cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa! Isn't it just a lovely day? I have a BE-A-U-ti-ful tree for you. Isn't it just a LOVE-ly tree!? Where would you like me to put it, Santa?"

Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree...

(Another friendly e-mail forwarded for your enjoyment)
 
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THAT WAS GREAT TRUESTORY MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE I WONT BE AOUND FOR XMAS SO IM SAYING IT NOW AND HAVE A GREAT TURKEY DAY SEE YALL NEXT YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I MIGHT POP ON FOR A SECOND IN DEC. DEPEDING ON IF WEBTV LETS ME IN AS IM GETTING WEBTV FOR PARENTS FOR XMAS AND MUST TEACH THEM HOW TO USE IT. BUT ONCE AGAIN MERRY XMAS AND LETS ALL HOPE Y2K LETS US ALL TALK AFTER JAN 1
HOHOHO

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Eric Cooper
 
Sorry if I am about to spoil someone's dinner, but the real origin of the angel on top of the Christmas tree is not funny at all - although sickeningly similar to this joke. Remember that it is originally a pagan tradition, incorporated into Christianity when Celts of Scotland and Ireland converted. To them fir tree was a sacred symbol of the God of Nature. Unlike (for example) Greeks, Celts believed the god of nature's yearly death and rebirth to be male, and sacrificed a virgin to him at winter solstice. A fir tree was festively decorated, the tree's top was sharpened, and the unfortunate virgin was impaled on it (I would assume through vagina, for maximum symbolism). Then everyone danced around the tree, prayed for the sun to come back, and had a wonderful time, while the corpse on the treetop turned white as it froze solid.

You can clean up your lunch now.
 
Letticia-Party pooper. :)

Anyway, what's your source? I've never heard of this tradition. I always thought it was just an alternative to the star on top of the tree. I know "London Bridge" is based on human sacrifice, and I'm sure we all know about "Ring Around The Roses" by now. I'm very interested in learning the origins of these traditions. Can you point me anywhere?

PS: That would make a cool Goth Christmas Tree. (jk)
 
I learned about it in an anthropology course about 10 years ago. I don't have the book handy, and the quick Internet search was inconclusive - there are references to ancient Britons impaling women for sacrifice, but not in relation to winter solstice. Most mention the mass impalement of captive Roman women by Cletic queen Boudicca (around 60 AD, if I am not mistaken). Here are couple examples:
http://easyweb.easynet.co.uk/~pato/ne/67/grove.html
http://hometown.aol.com/lisala/faqs/sacrific.html
 
i specifically remember placeing a reply on this topic. i understand that most of you hate me, but still u could at leaste leave it up their for others to see, god

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dexter
 
Letticia-Thanks. I'll check those sites out.

dexter-Every now and then I'll put up a post, it'll go through okay, but when I go to see if anybody responded, it's not there. I don't know what's going on.

I don't have a problem with you. If you put up a post that I feel I can respond to, I'll respond. If I agree with you, great. If I disagree, well then we get to swap ideas and opinions. I've seen some of the flame you've gotten. It's totally unwarranted. I saw Boris razz you for a simple mispelling somewhere. Did you see my reply about his mispelling?

If you keep having a problem with your posts not getting through, try to place a post in Site Feedback. If that still doesn't work, my equipment is working fine. E-mail me and I'll try to help.

[This message has been edited by Oxygen (edited November 16, 1999).]
 
thanx oxygen, i understand them , and why their doing it, their just mad bacuse someone like a forth of their age matches their intellegence. and i can see how that could hurt. but i want to thank u for sticking up for me a couple of time, so well.. thanx...
 
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