It's not like every potential lover I've been with I met suddenly without spending time with them beforehand. If your love life is anything like mine's been, many of your lovers come from friends, co-workers, etc --- perhaps people you see every day.
That being said, yes I definitely notice a lot of that stuff - but it's not like it's hard to see or anything. You spend time with anybody, you get to know them. For example, I go out to lunch with these people they'll obviously say things like "Oh - I can't try that spicy thing you're offering to me because of my stomach ulcer" or something like that.
Is it being picky? Well -- when you imagine yourself with someone, what do you imagine yourself doing with them? Don't you imagine things like...... going to a chili cookout with your mate and laughing/sharing the experience of the spicy food ("Holy moley honey -- that last one was spicy!! let's try enough one!" - laughter ensues). If you're a dog lover, wouldn't it suck to give up dogs because your partner is allergic? You imagine yourself make wild passionate love in a tent out in the woods someday, but your partner is a delicate weenie about being outdoors. it's very noble to sacrifice that stuff, but my god is it annoying.....especially in the long term.
That's what you get when you ignore the quirks. There are people who adapt, and there are people with piles and piles of these limitations. I'm attracted to the adapters
. And your wrong about the female domination it just depends on the type of volly work. For instance I'm a St john ambulance volly and the ratio is about 1 women to 3 or 4 guys. The volly firefighter services, the state emergency service ect all have higher male to female ratios. And even if it doesn't lead to a relationship (which St john certainly seems too, half the people there seem to have met there partners through the organization) at least you are doing something to help the community