All those whose council you seek, all those who you've ever loved have been actual believers. They do not daudle with black as you do. They ARE IT, and white is not okay. Thus you've twisted your view to accomodate the propaganda that supports black and denies white. Your mind however, develops discontinuities of which you are apparently at least vaguely aware, and you seek to avoid them, or patch them up so they appear as a smooth part of your mental landscape.
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In my world (and I was taking a particular example of something, no one believes in black as I do, or they they are the same as me in that black is part of their world but not all of their world, it means more to me than to them. My belief in black was not taught but brought about through experience and observation. I don't agree with all the definitions of black and I cannot entertain any ideas of white. I have a belief in black but accept I cannot know really what 'black' is? I just accept there is something undefinable about black that keeps me in a comfy place.
Odd analogy coming up!
Imagine marshmallows...I don't know how they are made or from what wharehouse they are made or who invented them, where the ingredients came from etc...but I like them and I indulge in them. Question my belief in marshmallows, say they are bad, not good for my health and I'll say....well in my view they are fine. I like them, they make me feel good. Gonna keep eating them and enjoying them. Tell myself they are 'good'. Tell myself I am right, you are wrong.
Thinking about it, this is what smokers do all the time. Smoking is bad for them, but they tell themselves it won't affect them or they deny the adverse affects to self and to others.
I guess what seperates black from white is 'comfort'.