# You take my wife, I'll take your money...

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Bells, Jan 8, 2008.

1. ### BellsFrostbite!Staff Member

Messages:
18,624
Best be careful about any affair you might have with a married individual if you happen to live in Mississippi. Some background:

Sandra Valentine goes to work for a wealthy realtor by the name of Jerry Fitch. Sandra is married to a plumber, Johnny Valentine. If this is sounding like a bad soapy already, be warned, it gets worse. Two years later Sandra gives birth to a baby girl. Then the secret is revealed. The child is not Johnny's but is in fact, Jerry's daughter. The marriage ends shortly after when she admits she committed adultery and she moves on to marry Jerry. Johnny, wanting revenge and with his wife's confession in hand, decides to sue Jerry under an outdated and "antiquated" law which permits:

And yes, it does get worse. A jury awarded Johnny $750,000(US) for his loss. It gets worse still. Let this be a lesson to those of you who live in Mississippi! The after work nookie with a married co-worker could end up costing you. 2. ### peta9Registered Senior Member Messages: 2,326 wow, that was mean but can't blame the husband, maybe the guy was a jerk anyways. funny story though. poetic justice? 3. ### G. F. SchleebenhorstEngland != UKRegistered Senior Member Messages: 2,213 The penalty for adultery in some places is death.... They got off lightly. If only the laws changed to this in all countries. 4. ### Ghost_007Registered Senior Member Messages: 2,170 Did Johnny do anything wrong? Why are you portraying him as the bad guy? As far as I'm concerned those that commit adultery are the lowest of the low. They have the worst qualities, they are scum. I feel for those that are cheated by adulterers, it must hurt like hell. Forget the$750,000, Johnny deserves both of their heads on a silver platter.

You take my wife, I'll take your life.

5. ### (Q)Encephaloid MartiniValued Senior Member

Messages:
19,127
Why is it you Muslims want to behead everyone?

6. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
Pretty much only for the woman. Hell, sometimes even if she is raped.

7. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
If you'd treated her better.
I mean, if she has easy access to a divorce and good ways to support herself, well, she should have been more honest. But if she's mistreated by you and has no more direct way to get what she needs, you and the men in the society who made the laws - to control women - are to blame for her disatisfaction.

She is, essentially, not yours.

8. ### OrleanderOH JOY!!!!Valued Senior Member

Messages:
25,822
Treating it this way (as theft) feels like the person has been reduced to property.
What an antiquated law. He should have sucked it up and moved on.

9. ### lucifers angelsame shit, differant day!!Registered Senior Member

Messages:
7,598
no he does not, what if johnny was not the guy you all seem to think he was?

people commit adultry for many reasons, not being happy in a marrage is just one, "you cant go forcing somthing if its just not right"

10. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
I agree as far as legal redress. I do think that people who are a lied to and
'cheated on' are going to get pissed off and sad and so on, and I think this is a ll just fine if it is expressed non-violently. In fact I think the ones having the affair often owe it to themselves to hear out the third wheel, however long it takes him or her to express their feelings about what went down.

Could they have been more up front?
Was the 'cheater' maintaining their own security without giving their boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse's security the same respect?
How did they hurt themselves by lying and sneaking around?
Was it parasitical?

11. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
Do Muslims (in general?) want to behead everyone?

I see in this question the possibility that you enjoy irreconcilible differences and hope to contribute to them.

12. ### mikenosticStop pretending you're smart!Registered Senior Member

Messages:
4,624
Luci,
I don't give a rat's ass what the reason is. There is NO excuse for adultery.
If you are a woman and feel neglected by your husband to the point of where you want to cheat, don't. Either reconcile with your husband or divorce him.
If you are a man and aren't getting the sex you want/need and feel like cheating, don't. Reconcile with your wife or divorce her.
ORRRRRR, if you don't like dealing with shit like this, don't get married in the first place.

13. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
And I, pretty much, agree with you. Of course we are not perfect people. There really is no excuse for neglect or meaness or coldness as a marriage partner either.

Perhaps you are totally honest and consistant in all your actions, even honest with the people you care about about your fears, even. Perhaps you are warm and sympathetic and very direct and have managed to be the person most of us wish we could be all the time. But if you haven't then you might also see adultery as one of many many patterns of dishonesty in a marriage and one of many hundreds of ways of breaking the heart - some of them so slowly it is hard to prove - of the one you swore to love, honor and cherish. Do most of us really know how to cherish the ones we are with?

I mean I have been and would be again off the wall pissed off at someone who cheated on me. Ripping mad and also other feelings.

But the sectioning off of certain kinds of behavior into categories of 'sin' even by those who are not religious seems shallow to me and as unforgiving - ultimately of ourselves - as the religions are about who and what we are.

14. ### joepistoleOrdo Ad ChaoValued Senior Member

Messages:
17,276
I agree with the court. We seemed to have lost the notion of honor somewhere along the line.

15. ### peta9Registered Senior Member

Messages:
2,326
Considering the circumstance, u could say it was justice. At least they divorced, for gawd's sake. I've seen relationships go through hell and high water and there is no honour there at all, just because two people stay together. Forgiveness isn't necessarily honorable either. I've seen couples stay together after one of them molests or rapes the other's child, beats them senseless, steals from them, verbally and emotionally abuse them, uses them etc.

There are so many ways to have a dishonorable relationship. A piece of paper don't mean squat when it comes to that.

16. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
Some lost the notion of cherish along the line.
Others, the notion of love.
Some see their spouses as sources of money or sex and get annoyed when they want to be seen as fully human.
We can enforce rules to gain control.

We can enforce rules but only about the highly visible things that private investigators can document.

But that's just BS.

How can a PI photograph a husband speaking with consdescension and having a cold heart toward his wife. As one example.

Where is his honor?

17. ### MylesRegistered Senior Member

Messages:
5,553
So their victims cannot talk back

18. ### joepistoleOrdo Ad ChaoValued Senior Member

Messages:
17,276
I am not getting you. As a man, I don't play around with other peoples wives. It is a point of honor with me. And any of that is not justification for the affair.

19. ### sowhatifit'sdarkValued Senior Member

Messages:
2,136
I agree. But there is no justification for the coldness etc. My experience is, especially with men, is that they have all sorts of excuses for breaking someone's heart through coldness, condescension, disrespect, distance, controlling aggressive behavior, etc., but when it comes to adultery, suddenly there is no justification.

As a man I don't play around with other people's wives either. It is not a point of honor for me. I think honor is an unnecessary abstraction. I don't want to hurt people: me, the woman, the other guy.

20. ### peta9Registered Senior Member

Messages:
2,326
as anyone with commonsense knows already, their are so many ways to disrespect and cheat another, adultery being one of them.

their are men who have affairs and blame the woman they are having the affair with as being loose etc but not themselves or their wife, even to the point of ganging up on them as in feigning protecting their wife from this other woman, so the married man can pretend he has nothing to do with the problem. that's sick and scummy too. that has to do with the popular status quo of scapegoating someone in a less traditional position. that's so obviously slimy considering the one who's fucking married isn't the other woman in the first place.

.