Why do women make eye contact?

Discussion in 'Human Science' started by artistmosi, Mar 24, 2006.

  1. devils_reject Registered Senior Member

    I'm one of those guys that has never really given much attention to women because I believe there is a lot of misconceptions about these creatures. Women are just like men only that they have more options than men, they are generally spoiled, whinny, and believe it or not...always in control. A Woman can fall for any guy who really plays his cards right and expresses himself...yes any guy. This doesn't necessarily mean it will lead to love making, as long as men remember that women are not sex objects they will have no problem, but most men are too stupid to realize this. The poor fucks, the poor stupid fucks. Over the past few years I have realized one important fact; the key to women is actually knowing yourself and what you want.
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  3. hug-a-tree Live the life Registered Senior Member

    I make eye contact with a lot of people I walk by and I don't mean anything by it.
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  5. artistmosi Registered Senior Member

    devils_reject is right on this one, for a change
    Last edited: Mar 29, 2006
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  7. heliocentric Registered Senior Member

    You speak the truth

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  8. Sci-Phenomena Reality is in the Minds Eye Registered Senior Member

    HAHAHAHAHA, excellent Dragon, that makes me want to make my favorite food of all: Green Jello with various eyes embedded...
  9. Zarklephaser Registered Senior Member

    This one time in Mexico, I ate a goat's eye in a tortilla at some shitty diner.
  10. lovegeneration Registered Member


    This is something I agree with, I actually do the same thing, but with most people because I love contact... Unless of course I am feeling uncomfortable. Because if I am not then I will usually find interest in the person. Under other circumstances I will usually look away.
  11. Blue_UK Drifting Mind Valued Senior Member

    Girls who like me are never the ones I'm chasing, presumably because I'm all too obvious!

    Staring, following... you know.
  12. Roman Banned Banned

    ...calling, rummaging through their trash, spying, stalking, restraining orders....
  13. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

    The 'eye contact' discussion never goes out of date, IMO, and so I beg the moderator's indulgence in dusting off this thread that I noticed someone perusing on the first page of 'Who's Online'.

    I am a woman, so you need not speculate upon my answer save to wonder why I would answer at all. In this case, it is because it caught my attention and communication skills are of interest to me, both personally and professionally, as they make for healthy and enduring relationships.

    Speaking only for myself, I make eye contact for the following reasons:

    1) Peripherally, to assess the mood of the other and whether they are a potential threat to me.

    2) Peripherally, to assess if the individual is in any distress and may need some assistance from me.

    3) Brief glance if there is something about the individual that I have never seen before, as in one eye each color, unusual attire or hairstyle.

    4) Second glance if my brain registers needing more detail for later review and perusal, usually in relation to something in point 3.

    5) Eye contact and brief smile to children, animals and elders, those who may be assisting me in their jobs. Meant to be non-threatening and reassuring, usually elicits a smile back in response and relaxes any preconceived tensions.

    6) Eye contact with neutral expression when facing another for purposes of negotiation or mediation. Gaze not held overlong, but frequently returned to during course of discussion.

    7) To passersby, I respond as seems appropriate. I avoid eye contact with ticket vendors/buskers/pan-handlers unless I am intending to contribute to their cause.

    I have noticed an increasing number of male persons seeking eye contact with me, lol, and lets just say for the record that I am in that age bracket beyond cougar. One gent required assistance finding the canned mushrooms yesterday and I'm not certain that he couldn't have found them on his own. They are fairly obvious, though we did move them in the aisle some many months ago and he is a regular shopper. Maybe he just doesn't use mushrooms often.

    As I was leaving the store after shift, I noticed another fellow glancing my way, his vehicle parked adjacent to mine. He called out "Been playing in the mud, have you?"

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    Bold fellow to address me so, lol, but I smiled and replied that I was a night stalker (pun intended) a task which entailed much getting down on one's knees to stock the bottom shelves or pull product forward that customers can more easily reach things. I busied myself putting my few purchases and other things in my vehicle.

    "Have a nice day", he said as he was getting into his vehicle, to which I responded "Thanks, and you also", looking up as he pulled away, as he was looking in my direction.

    He had left his shopping cart beside my car, and as he circled around, we made eye contact one last time as I nodded at his cart with a slightly raised eyebrow, as I was moving toward it with intent.

    He smiled and continued on his way.

    Apparently he had intended for myself or someone to benefit from the $1.00 of the cart return, though the carts were parked not 60 feet away and he had not seemed to be ambulatory impaired.

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  14. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

    Where do you live that you have to deposit a dollar to use a shopping cart??? It's certainly not a bad idea. I'm always picking them up (I even found one in the woods last week), stuffing them in the back of my truck and schlepping them back to the grocery store.

    Women never initiate eye contact with me. Even my female friends don't do it very often. Americans anyway, my friends from India and China are a little more likely. Well now that I think about it, Afro-American ladies (including strangers) do it far more often than Euro-Americans.
  15. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

    I work in the present capital city of Yukon Territory, Canada, that being Whitehorse, and I live beyond the city limits. By area, Whitehorse is one of the 'largest' cities in Canada with a very low population density.

    The pay for cart circumstance was introduced by Loblaws grocery which operates Superstore and Extra Foods as two of it's banners.

    You make an interesting distinction about 'initiating eye contact' versus just making eye contact, or perhaps that is just how I am interpreting your comments.

    I am generally quite caught up in my thoughts and actions when busy and so do not initiate much eye contact, although I am frequently making eye contact, if I have expressed this difference precisely.

    As people are moving and interacting, there is frequent exchanges of eye contact as we try not to get into each others' way, among other things. A clever fellow can just strategically position himself so that the women can't help but notice him and initiate contact, even if it's just to ask him to move out of the way, lol....

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  16. Enmos Registered Senior Member

    Perhaps it's you. I mean, perhaps you notice it just more. People do look each other in the eye. Nothing special about it. Are you looking to find a girlfriend?
  17. Enmos Registered Senior Member

    We, in the Netherlands, have that as well, only it's a euro here (naturally). Or a 50 eurocent piece.
  18. billvon Valued Senior Member

    I'm one of those guys who don't think they are separate "creatures." They're just people. Some are controlling, some aren't. Some are spoiled, some aren't. Some are whiny, some aren't. In other words, in those ways they're very much like guys.
  19. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

    Eye contact can also be a form of assessment, and as more women are moving into management, politics and other work venues which were formerly more male oriented, I believe they are emulating some of the body language which may be associated with these vocations.

    Our culture tends to associate an open, and direct gaze with the virtues of trust, strength and integrity.

    I am not suggesting that this may be the case, only that we have made that association through literature and film. :bugeye:

    What the connotations may be in regard to sexual attraction, I shall let others comment on. Not for me to reveal the secrets of the sisterhood, lol....far more fun to keep the male in a questioning dither of uncertainty.

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  20. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

    That is very much the case.

    Many of women's perceived negative attributes are but reflections of those characteristics which are also to be found in men.

    It has long been said that we criticize in another that which reflects our own intolerance and weakness at a similar level.
  21. cosmictraveler Be kind to yourself always. Valued Senior Member

    Women stare at me because of my large mole on my face!

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  22. chimpkin C'mon, get happy! Registered Senior Member

    I'd stare at that too! Then tell you to go get that removed asap by a doctor, really, that looks like skin cancer!

    I used to not be able to look people in the eyes. If I accidentally made eye contact, I would cringe in shame and fear.
    A high school counselor forced me to make eye contact with him, it was excruciatingly painful to do so...but eventually it became less hideous to look people in the eye.
    Now I make eye contact with strangers as a way of saying the following:
    "I see you,I'm prepared to like you and am of kindly intent.
    I won't attack you if you don't attack me...but I'm watching you."

    People see the kindly intent, and sometimes think I'm an easy mark. They're not the bright ones.
    (I used to be. Get taken enough...)
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2011
  23. madanthonywayne Morning in America Registered Senior Member


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