That is bullshit. I've faced down bullies and and beat them until they cried. You have to get them on their own of course, but revenge is a dish best served cold, and patience is rewarded. One guy I corrected ended up crying so hard his older sister came to 'sort me out'. I didn't admit to having smacked her brother around, but pointed out that all he had was a taste of his own medicine, and _if_ I was the guy that had done it, was she wise riling me? Bullies are cowards. Of course you won't want to admit that now, but you were a coward.
a.) i will admit i was a coward b.) i got into plenty of fights by myself and nearly all the time i won as i take boxing training and dabble in ju jitsu
Actually you make a good point, if a bully wasnt a coward why isnt the bully taking on other bullies? Why don't bullies go after the toughest kid in school? Why always pick on the weakest and smallest?
I notice that poor Treval has not checked back in since his original post. I wonder how much of this is useful. I'd like to know what kind of bullying this actually is. Girls are less likely to be physically violent than boys, because at that age their verbal and social skills are far more advanced than ours. I'd also like to know a little more about what the girlfriend is doing that the other girls are reacting to. If it's just "being smart," well that can be perceived as aggressiveness, trying to become the teacher's favorite. Showing off to the one person in her life who appreciates her intelligence, and not caring what the other girls think until they get so mean that she can't help notice. Smart girls have the same problem that smart boys do: They find it so easy to build up their intellectual skills, and they find that adults appreciate that so much, that they don't pay any attention to their social skills, something adults may not even notice. I know we all make fun of schools for trying to teach kids to "get along" instead of math and reading, but a little bit of it is not entirely inappropriate. She may very well be developing a personality and an attitude that will be just as unpopular in adulthood. Treval, you don't see that side of her because you have a special relationship and you see parts of each other that no one else sees. Do you have any good friends who see her when you're not around, who can give you a different point of view on these situations? It might be very illuminating. It looks like most of the people giving advice here are men, and we have to remember the Venus/Mars thing. Women don't bother each other the same way men do, and they don't solve their problems the same way men do. Most women are not as motivated to be strong alphas as we are. They like to cooperate, to fit in, to build a community. Yeah they have their own ways of sniping at each other, but they're nothing like our ways. We don't usually even notice them. The girlfriend probably needs some advice on how to stop antagonizing the other girls, how to get along. I don't think she's going to get that from a bunch of guys.
Sorry Fraggle but this is so wrong, women can be evil heartless bitches and bullying in form of bitching and gossipping is very common amongst the lower denominators. It is their only means of defence, they feel under threat by intelligence so they attack it. They feel under threat by good looks, so they attack those. they feel under threat by a womans financial independance so they attcak that, and so on and so forth. Most green eyes monsters are surely female?
I think this is the right approach. You just have to make sure that you will win. I suggest martial arts, or sneaking up on them and whacking them with a chair. I don't know if they are really cowards, but you have to call their bluff right away, or they get encouraged. It wasn't mine, I just acted so weird that it would not increase a person's status or ego to mess with me. Maybe they were scared at what I might do. Also, I started to be good at art, and even the bullies admired it.
theoryofrelativity: Well said! This girl shouldn't have to conform to the ideals of a bunch of bitches. To be honest, if I was her boyfriend, I would have a nice little 'chat' with the people giving this girl a hard time. I'd do so if it was a bunch of guys who was giving her a hard time. I don't see why a bunch of girls is any different. As to how to deal with it, I whole-heartedly agree that you need to strike back against bullies, and demonstrate that you aren't a weak target. The moment you demonstrate that the act of bullying you will cost them something, they will stop. It's a common fact of life (and only varies in extreme cases, where a bully has some sort of powerful personal grudges against you. This is very rare). How to strike back in this case is a little difficult to decide. If the bullying is indeed physical, then I would strongly recommend fighting back and beating the bully to pulp. However, since this is verbal bullying, I'm not sure. Although I think that constant verbal bullying is justified with an ass whooping, it will look terrible to any spectating administrator. "She responded to words with physical force. How barbaric!" Perhaps the best idea is to just retort with your own insults, and stand up to these girls verbally. Hopefully goad them into attempting to take a swing at you. And then beating the shit out of them in self-defense. spidergoat: No, not necessarily. All you have to do is make sure that you hurt the bully. If he realizes that bullying you will cost him something (the right not to feel pain), then he will not do so. Quite simply, all you need to do is give the bully a blood nose. Martial arts is inpractical. I'd just suggest that you surprise them by getting the first hit. And don't stop kicking them when they are on the ground until the beg for you to stop.
The victim of bullying is just as stupid as the bully themselves. They have let themselves become bothered about the social ladder. Theres no possible way I could become a victim anymore since I don't really give a fuck if people don't deem me fit to be included into the mainstream. Sometimes I even enjoy not being part of the mainstream, offering a dig or two here and there. But of course, I'm 24 now... Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
mountainhare, Jesus dude, I'm not gonna fight with you, that's for sure... Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
I disagree with your hypothesis. I think girls are just as violent as boys, they just use stealth bullying. You are correct about one thing, intellectual skills do seem to influence social skills. I admit I'm not socially talented, but this is because I never enjoyed socializing. Social skills come when they come, for some they come later, but they still come, as you cannot avoid socializing. As far as bullying, the worst kinds of bullying arent the physical kinds, the worst kinds are the emotional, psychological, and financial kinds. The intellectuals usually become the bullies later in life once they begin to see how much power they have, but in highschool it's the opposite, the intellectuals are bullied physically. Let us hope that intellectuals who were bullied, decide not to become what they once hated. If intellectuals want to use their mind power, it's best to figure out how to give tools to other intellectuals to deal with physical bullies, such as laws, money, or whatever else, but the intellectuals are actually at the top of the pyramid in the end, ask Bill Gates.
The physical bullying is how they puncture a person's mental shields. When the victim does everything he or she can to shut out the bully's whispered taunts and do his work, the bully can stick a pencil in him and get him to scream. Then the teacher who is a collaborator throws the victim out in the hallway, denying him the education he is entitled to, getting him in even more trouble with the principal, and humiliating him in front of the class. Screw anyone who disagrees with this assessment. A ten-year-old child cannot be expected by any reasonable person to be able to keep from screaming when someone inflicts tremendous pain on him.
Spidergoat, spidergoat Spits a web any size Catches girls just like flies lookout, here comes the spidergoat. In the middle of the night, you can hear the screams and shouts He's got bitches left and right in his room and on the couch.
yeah, I said that on p.1- alot of useless info here "whack 'em on the back of the head with a chair"..."take karate" :bugeye:
Whats all this 'if youre being bullied its your fault' bullshit comming from some of you, thats some backwards shit. Fucking kids.
No one likes a suckup. Solution: Stop being a suckup. We've all just assumed that the original poster's girlfriend's cousin's sister's whatever is just minding her own business throughout this post. The truth is, if you're going to be an annoying suckup, you're going to get shit for it. We are talking about a bit of a piss-taking, not physical abuse, so why are we all taking the original poster's side without question? A bit of name calling is nothing your average five year old can't shrug off.
What they are trying to say is, you cannot fight a bully by playing the victim. What you have to do is bully the bullies. You have to become the anti-bully. The problem with bullies is not that they fight, the problem with bullies isnt even the fact that they bully, it's WHO they bully that seperates the good and bad bullies. People who bully the weak are predators, and are highly disliked. You go to a prison, a place filled with bullies, and the most hated breed in prison are the child molestors, these guys prey on the weakest and most vulnerable. Then you have the bullies which prey on women, beating up their wife but won't challenge their boss. Then you have the bullies who are the boss and who beat up on their employees. Bullies can be good people, it depends on what side they are on. You have to think of it like this, the police are bullies, but most of the time the police bully the right people.
