What does love feel like?

Discussion in 'General Philosophy' started by Cactus Jack, May 19, 2002.

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  1. EmptyForceOfChi Banned Banned

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    i suggest writting that down for your wedding vows, they are very romantic.

    peace.
     
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  3. BladeWalker Registered Member

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    Am I a cold heart bastard?

    I also broke up with my girlfriend, this was last night and I feel terrible,

    Maybe some day I will know that what I felt was in fact Love and not this thing that I think should be "Love", I mean this "Love" is the one that I've been exposed to all my life the "Love" from TV, from movies, commercials and what people think and say should feel like "Love" (butterflies in the stomach, thinking about that person all the time etc) and having never really experienced it before I didn't know any better

    Maybe every single person feels Love in different ways there's no "One size fits all" for Love and I think that's why I had to break up with her 'cause she was constantly telling me (suggesting) that I wasn't feeling (or I wasn't having the usual symptoms of) Love and besides she wasn't my ideal woman (again forced-fed on me by TV etc. etc.) Or maybe this is just an excuse, if I really loved her I wouldn't care about those "suggestions" I wouldn't need someone to tell me what I was feeling or not ! even If that someone was the person I love, yeah maybe I never loved her in the first place and I was feeling sorry for her and didn't dare telling her (which is something she said she hated, I mean for someone to feel sorry or pity for her)

    I don't know that's why I'm writing with maybes

    Don't get me wrong, I didn't break up with her just because she was (in a way) pushing me to that but because I really felt I did not love her and all I was doing was lying to her and to myself, I didn't want to hurt her anymore because I was starting to hurt her more and more by not answering her questions with straight answers and she could probably tell I was in doubt by the tone of my voice

    I really screwed up guys ! If this wasn't Love what was it?, I'm starting to regret this decision

    Let me explain to you guys what was the kind of Love that I felt:

    it's true that I felt kind of sorry for her because she told me she was just recovering from an abusive relationship in which her boyfriend almost killed her by bitting her up while she was pregnant and that made her lose the baby and the ability of ever becoming pregnant again she felt "empty inside" in her own words

    I could notice certain self destructive tendencies in her behavior (she was doing drugs and smoking too much), but aside from all this I was really captivated by her story and her strange beauty, so different to what I was looking for (or to what I was force-fed), I was drawn to her by her "bad girl" looks and because she also likes hard rock music (which is quite strange in my country for a girl to like, or so I thought!) anyway we had a lot of things in common, sometimes it was like if she could read my mind and sex was sooo good, but we also had things we didn't like about each other and I thought that even when my love wasn't a wild and intense feeling it was virtuous because it was not based on pre-conceived ideas or likes.

    But in the end my obsession with beauty was stronger and I realized that I wasn't as attracted to her physically as to promise her eternal "couple faithfulness" and so one day she said: please tell me if you're not my "magician", don't lie to me, so two days later and after having it thought really hard, (a song in the radio really made up my mind it seemed to be written just for that occasion), I decided to break up with her.

    So Love to me is a very confusing feeling....
     
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  5. EmptyForceOfChi Banned Banned

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    a shank in the spinal cord, from some guy in a cell fight.


    peace.
     
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  7. cosmictraveler Be kind to yourself always. Valued Senior Member

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    Love plays many sounds and shows us many colors, but the most important thing about it is that we can express it as well as recieve it.
     
  8. Norsefire Salam Shalom Salom Registered Senior Member

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    A rainbow in your heart
     
  9. juju Registered Member

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    ...impatience, you just can't wait to see them again, on your mind all the time..?? Is that how? I don't know, I'm too young, Education first then love!

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    Kidding!

    Love is a word, you can't describe it, you can only feel it and i'm sure you all know how it feels.
    Salams.
     
  10. juju Registered Member

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    Offtopic : Yay! My 17th post, not bad...how do you all reach to your thousands? Lol, lotsa time on your hands...
     
  11. Wisdom_Seeker Speaker of my truth Valued Senior Member

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    Love feels like fresh water pouring down to your heart; it cleanses your soul. Love feels like an overflowing magic inside you, with no limitations or fear.
    When you are in love, you are high on it, you are generous, you become the love.
    Love is like an eternal flame that never fades... it becomes a fire in your being, it is uncontainable, and you are possesed by it...

    The longest breath of love, is the shortest distance to heaven...

    hope this helps

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  12. Beautiful1989 Registered Member

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    I think that love is when he is the last thing you think about before you go to bed and the first thing when you wake up in the morning its when everything they do in your eyes is perfection like when youre at work and all day you think of things to say to them that will make them laugh its when you cant sleep unless hes ther for you to lay your head on when you call him just to hear his voice when your away from him and he stays on the phone till you fall asleep because without him youre incomplete its when you miss him so bad that everything that reminds you of him makes you cry because youre not together and the only way you feel happy is when you see a picture or hear his voice and your favorite lauryn hill song brings you to tears of joy because you cant believe that god has blessed you with such a wonderful feeling
     
  13. DESTINY831 Registered Member

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    Confused

    Thank You for shining some light on this subject.
    Nelson, I as well had never visited this site before but did join at the opportunity to thank you for your insight in this topic. I have recently found myself in a relationship that is quickly spinning out of control but for sake of loss, I do not want to bail out. He wants me with him all of the time, and for a while I guess I wanted that to, but now I just seem to be running scared.
    Any suggestions on how to slow him down a bit, or should I trust my instinct deal with the pain and leave him???
    I hope you still hang around here!
    Thanks in advance!
    Amanda
     
  14. Why? Registered Senior Member

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    Love is not felt in your groins. Love otherwise feels good.
     
  15. machaon Registered Senior Member

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    Love feels like brand spanking new hippopotamus. You know, like a little brown lake with ferns and stuff.
     
  16. xxB@biCJxx Registered Member

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    Feeling kind of confused right now about the whole idea that there are two types of love...i haven't had alot of boyfriends but yet still believe i've felt some type of love at some point. When i was younger it may have been a stupid crush though but i'll tell you how it felt and maybe you could tell me what you think.
    All i know and rememba is that, he was one of the boys you could only dream about havin...i think he was popular good looking and i liked him to the point yano where u've seen a girl or boi that you like and you try picture there head in ur mind but u can neva get it right ..bits missin..jus doesnt work...i used to stare at this guy so much i could get what he looked like perfectly and used to wish i could take thsi picture out of my mind and put it on to paper ..copy it and have his picture all round my room...baring in mind i was in like year 5 or 6..one day we started going out..what i didnt know was that his mum n my mum were close friends.
    i rememba him cumin up to me on valentines day givin me some chocolate ..which was to bunnys looking at eachother and a chocolate heart in the middle but his mum had to pass it to me because he was hiding behind her..hehe ..bless him..something bad happened in the time i was going out with him ...which took place round him house..which i dont think i should talk about if this is something every1 is goin to see...even though probabli most of u can gues..all i knw that afta wat he tried to do i felt nothing the same...but cudnt dump him cuz even though wat he tried to do i cudnt bring myself to hurt him

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    ...how sad is that...
    neway wat i was talkin about at the first part of my long arse story tell me what you make of it...and i have about 2 myb 2 more stories for u 2 luk at ..if u wna that is.. x cj x
     
  17. pjdude1219 The biscuit has risen Valued Senior Member

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    its squishy
     
  18. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    When you're young you have two problems identifying love. One is that your hormones are very active so much of what you feel is simply the physiological effect of your endocrine system on your brain rather than an emotional effect. A really good-looking (or otherwise attractive) person of the opposite sex can arouse you sexually and you interpret it as a romantic feeling.

    The other problem is perhaps even more basic. Since you have little or no experience with romantic love, you don't exactly know what it's supposed to feel like. You feel a "crush" for someone, which is only affection. Or you feel admiration, respect, wistfulness, loneliness, gratitude, any of a hundred emotions. Add to that the insistent reminder from your hormones that you really wanna get laid, and as far as you can tell, that combination of strong feelings is what love is.

    This isn't made any easier to sort out by the fact that love really is a combination of strong feelings. There's just a little more to it than a crush combined with lust, or loneliness combined with a nice-looking guy expressing interest in you.

    You're probably going to get this same answer from every adult you ask: Love is something that you'll just know when you get it. I'm sure I've given this answer to several other young folks on this board before: If you're not sure, even the teeny-weeniest little doubt, then it's not love. Love knocks you down and leaves you with absolutely no doubt. And frequently with no breath and no sense either.

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  19. sowhatifit'sdark Valued Senior Member

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    Well the scientists who gave us the reduced to hormones theory of adolescent behavior are going to have hormones and neurortransmitters for romantic attraction too. And an honest appraisal of our crushes, infatuations and romantic attractions, should, I think reveal that we can be loopy about romance also.

    Adult divorce rates, extramarital affairs, prostitute visits and general dissatisfaction should set off little warning bells that age or relative stability carries with it discerning powers.
     
  20. sowhatifit'sdark Valued Senior Member

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    I find love is felt my groin (I have just one groin, and I even find I do not envy those with more than one). I notice that the woman I have loved have been loved by my groin. And much more than my groin has loved other women who I did not love with all the other non-groin regions.
     
  21. Heath Ledger Banned Banned

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    If life were a musical instrument, love would be the music.
     
  22. lacoste268 Registered Member

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    well, i have seen some reli good explanations on here, cactus jacks really does ring true. for me, there is this girl in my life, we are in a relationship, only for a month or so atm, amd we are still young, 17 n 19 2 b exact, but i will tell you what i feel like, i dont know if it is love, but it just feels right.
    when we are together, there isnt anywhere else i would rather be, i jsut want the time to last forever, but it seems to go by so quickly, when i hold her in my arms, i feel like nothing could ever be wrong, even looking into her eyes, everything warms up. when i leave however, i miss her, so much it is unbelievable, everytime i get a text or call i want it to be her. things really couldnt be any better atm. like i said, i dont know wot love is meant to feel like, but there is something tellin me that me n her were meant to be, everything is perfect atm, for me, she is the most perfect person i know. so i am too inexperienced to know for definate if it is love, and i will appreciate anything you have to say, but it reli does feel like we have something special

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  23. nessiboi Registered Member

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    ADVICE?????!!!!! would highly appreciate it!

    So here is my deal right now. been single for over 3 years (by choice) was waiting for that one girl to come along and knock me off my feet. happened. i cant stand not seeing her. i don't see her for a day or 2 and it feels like 2 weeks. she just got out of a 3 year relationship with a guy she FINALLY realized wasn't good to her/for her. its only been a lil over 2 months or so and she told me that she didn't know if she was ready/or wanted another relationship. I told her that i was totally fine with that and that i was by her side 100%. she says she loves me she just wanted to tell me now so that she doesnt end up hurting me in the end because she wasn't 100% committed. which i can completely agree with. i guess im just curious to know that; is this normal? i can kinda see why because obviously she just got done with a relationship, but i dunno everything was going really well and i still talk to her everyday. ummm whats going on? im not worried about anything but at the same time i am. help me out!!! haha thank you

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