Something that's always bothered me about Valentine's Day is when people give valentines to family members, co-workers, and friends. Valentines are supposed to be given to people you'd like to fuck, people. I know some people are into that, but there's something creepy about teaching children to have romantic notions about their parents, teachers, pets, etc. (Yes, there are valentines for pets:bugeye:.) I saw one interesting decoration, though. The decoration depicted Winnie the Pooh with a surprised look on his face getting a big, enthusiastic hug from Tigger. Given that the holiday is for lovers and secret admirers and that Pooh and Tigger are both guys, I thought "Tigger's gay?" I never celebrated Valentine's Day simply because I never got one in earnest. Yeah, it left me bitter about it. My husband never celebrated it because he felt it was a waste of money and, as has been pointed out, the guy has to blow shitloads of cash on the slim chance that he might get some while all the girl has to do is sit around and eat chocolate while guys throw themselves at her feet. We laugh at the guys who are crowding into the flower shops trying to buy a dozen red roses at 5 o'clock because God help them if they show up at the door without flowers and candy.
Are we getting just a teeny bit obsessed with sex here? Valentine's Day used to be a kids' holiday and it had almost nothing to do with sex. If you had a crush on a girl in the fifth grade you'd give her a valentine. Of course then the teacher made everybody give everybody else on so no one would feel left out. I guess that was the first stirring of this idiotic "no child left behind" movement. Personally, even back then I thought it would have been instructive for the people who got no valentines to actually get no valentines. Maybe they would go home and contemplate their bad selves. But it's really supposed to be about love, not sex. Being 3,000 miles from home I got a valentine from my wife and a separate one from my dogs. I miss them all, I thought it was rather sweet. If you want to have sex with somebody, show up at his door in a sexy outfit with a bottle of wine. Sure, you can do it on Valentine's Day, why not. There's no reason that it can't include sex. But that's not what is supposed to be the focus, it's more innocent than that. Love is in short supply these days. Encouraging families to express it one day a year is a little silly but I don't see anything terribly wrong with it. Ah, inter-species love. You might let some real-life biology provide a useful perspective on this. A horse and a zebra can have sex, or a dog and a coyote, or a scarlet macaw and a blue-and-gold macaw. But outside of the same genus sex is not an issue. Pooh and Tigger can no more have an erotic relationship than I can with my dog. But I still love my dog and Pooh and Tigger still love each other. This is not about sex. Get your mind out of the gutter! You didn't really have to say that, it was pretty obvious. So your old man is a jerk about a cultural institution which, you have to admit, has been hijacked by commericalism since the days of my youth. A lot of people feel that way about Christmas so you could do worse. I hope he has a great many redeeming qualities and on the balance you have a happy life together on the other 364 days. You talk like some old curmudgeon from my generation or only slightly younger like Baron Max. I thought you kids had gotten past all that. You women are out there competing for our jobs while at the same time getting to go home at 5:00 because you have to pick the kids up, and you still want the flowers too? Give me a break! Now candy, well yes candy. Everyone should get candy. Something made with Valrhona chocolate. I don't get to buy it for my wife because she is a chocolatier. We always have homemade truffles and Easter eggs. I can't buy her flowers either because she had a conniption the one time I paid $75 to buy them on the internet and have them delivered. She'd rather have a cleaning lady for a day and a half for the same money, since I'm not home to do my share of the housework.
And before that? History goes back a lot farther than the 1950s, y'know. But I agree with your wife as far as having a cleaning lady. My husband is no great romantic, and if he suddenly popped up with flowers I'd wonder who this stranger is who looks so much like him. We're not completely anti-holiday. We celebrate each other's birthdays, our anniversary (but not with fancy gifts so much as a simple toast to another year, we're both very low maintenance), Independence Day, Halloween (the only time we decorate our house), Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the New Year. His mother insists on Mother's Day, so the three of us get together and go to a movie that she wants to see (she hates going alone, but she's a difficult person to be with, otherwise we'd go a lot more often), but Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, Easter, etc., we have no use for. We have a very happy 365 days, 366 on leap year, even if you count the fights that inevitably happen. Neither one of us is very big on convention for convention's sake, and if we choose not to follow a convention it's because we genuinely don't care for it and there's no law requiring us to. We sync up on a lot and we differ on a lot. According to our friends, therein lies our strength.
