Things You Never Want To Hear

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by darksidZz, Aug 25, 2010.

  1. darksidZz Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
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    I had this idea earlier, post what things you never want to hear from someone, I mean like the worst thing you can imagine being told. I'll begin.

    "I'm pregnant."

    "You're under arrest."

    "Guilty."

    lol!
     
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  3. superstring01 Moderator

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    "Gimme some of that pussy."

    My dad to my step-mother.

    And, yes, I really heard that about 20 years ago.

    Yes, I still gag a little when I think about it. "The Human Centipede" [or, substitute your favorite gross movie here] has nothing on the nausea inducing power of coming home from my best friend's house (to a, supposedly empty house) and walking upstairs to hear him say that to her.

    ~String
     
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  5. cosmictraveler Be kind to yourself always. Valued Senior Member

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    Your brain scan came back and there was no activity found!
     
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  7. domesticated om Stickler for details Valued Senior Member

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    Penis doctor: "I'm sorry Mr Om, we're going to have to amputate"
     
  8. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

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    but due to the nature of the ailment, we cannot use anaesthetic...here bite on this!
     
  9. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

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    "Hi, Geoff? This is darksidz. I just wanted you to know that I'm not hiding in your closet. Not. I just thought that you'd want to know. Could you get to sleep early tonight? It's really stuffy in here."
     
  10. NO1 I Am DARKNESS Registered Senior Member

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    187 on an undercover cop
     
  11. Bebelina kospla.com Valued Senior Member

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    Your internetconnection has been permanently terminated.
     
  12. clusteringflux Version 1. OH! Valued Senior Member

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    "I don't know what it is. The doctor says I could have gotten it from the public toilet seat and soars should clear up in a few years with treatment"
     
  13. Gremmie "Happiness is a warm gun" Valued Senior Member

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    After taking a beautiful woman out to dinner and a movie...

    She states... I'll bet mines bigger than yours!

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

     
  14. Pinwheel Banned Banned

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    Doctor: "Unfortunately due to your accident, you are permanently deaf"
     
  15. Enmos Valued Senior Member

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    43,184
    Not a big chance you'll ever hear that (or anyone for that matter).
    But then.. you're just being a smart ass, aren't you?

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

     
  16. Dinosaur Rational Skeptic Valued Senior Member

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    While on the operating table, groggy but not unconscious.
    • Better save that for the autopsy.
    • Oops! Has anyone ever survived 500CC of that?
    • Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!
    • Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
    • Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie.
    • Are you sure we've removed the appendix ? I thought it was much higher and inside the body ...
    • Ok, Lets try that incision again. Nurse could you fetch my glasses please.
    • Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of them.
    • Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness
     
  17. domesticated om Stickler for details Valued Senior Member

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    Plazma Inferno: "Good news everyone! It gives me great pleasure to announce that SciForums will be changing to a premium subscription service starting September 1rst. If you purchase a year subscription prior to that date, you only pay $36.99. Afterward the special will end and the full price is $54.99......so act today. Visa, Mastercard, Discovery, and PayPal accepted!"
     
  18. jmpet Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
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    -"You'll live, but we have to cut your penis off."

    -"It's not that bad- let me wipe the blood off your eyes so you can see."
     
  19. M00se1989 Banned Banned

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    508
    "Your account has been temporarily suspended. This suspension is due to end on Jan 6 2016, 01:42 AM."

    WTF 2016!!!! physics damn you!!!
     
  20. NO1 I Am DARKNESS Registered Senior Member

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    I want my $1 back
     
  21. Stryder Keeper of "good" ideas. Valued Senior Member

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    13,104
    "You are god almighty, founder of the heavens and earth, we bow before you to seek enlightenment and grant you homage"

    Years of being an Atheist would clearly place me in a rather shitty predicament.
     
  22. scifes In withdrawal. Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,573
    this wins hands down:roflmao:
     
  23. jmpet Valued Senior Member

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    "You were a mistake" -your mom
     

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