The DOs and DON’ts of Sex in 2012

Discussion in 'Science & Society' started by KilljoyKlown, Jun 11, 2012.

  1. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    At the very least this sounds like trolling to me. I think quad was looking for some nibbles and is getting more than he bargained for.
     
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  3. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    Perhaps you're right. You're not the first to suggest it. Mrs. Fraggle often puts her head in her hands and says resignedly that I was born without the gene for sarcasm.

    But in an international community I'm surely not the only one who didn't get the joke. Quad has been banned so apparently the other moderators feel the same way, even the ones who are not missing that gene and who have spoken English all their lives--even Australian English.

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    If it was a joke I'd apologize to him for not getting it, but I'd also smack him upside the head for being so dumb. In any case I'm relieved that my complaint was not the sole instigation of the ban.

    We don't let people use the N word as a joke. It's only allowed in the Linguistics forum, on rare occasions, when it's clearly the word itself that is being discussed. And only once in an entire thread. The same applies to the H word, at least in America. It's considered "hate speech." Walk into a bar and start tossing it around and you can be arrested for "fightin' words," i.e., language so inflammatory that can reasonably be expected to start a fight.
     
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  5. Gustav Banned Banned

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    quad appears to be back early (6 day ban)
    you mods fucked up
    restitution is required

    sfog a public apology
     
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  7. Gustav Banned Banned

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    pick as many barfights you want in an appropriate venue
    sci aint one of them. your violent tendencies are not welcome here

    idiocy

    weaseling

    cake/eat
    backhanded

    weaseling
    apologize unambiguously and promise not to troll again
     
  8. quadraphonics Bloodthirsty Barbarian Valued Senior Member

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    Wow, I hadn't checked this thread since leaving that bit of throw-away sarcasm/parody, but talk about your knee-jerk PC over-reach....

    Problem seems to be more to do with the level of idiocy, than internationalism.

    In retrospect, I realize the Poe's Law dictates I should have been more careful. But frankly I'm shocked to hear this response from anyone who is the slightest bit familiar with my output here. I have been very consistently and vocally on the side of gay rights and marriage equality since forever - where have you been? Taking your knee-spring in for maintenance, to ensure its superior jerkiness?

    It was.

    Those are fighting words, right there. That's a literal threat and a personal insult. I'd be bothered by it, except for the fact that you're making a complete ass out of yourself, you have no real way of locating me physically to follow through, and even if you did I'm fairly confident that an old fart like yourself would not really present a serious physical threat to the likes of me (unless you were armed or brought a gang or something).

    But the point is that this is hardly the sort of thing that somebody who is engaged in an exercise in PC sphincter-spasming can afford to engage in. You're deep into facepalm territory here, even if you'd been justified on your initial complaint.

    Actually, I'm not sure that such would be objectionable in a comparable context (i.e., lampooning a dipshit racist). Dave Chappelle certainly got away with it, on TV and everything. Not that I'm about to try it, but I reject the implication of your analogy there (as well as the analogy itself - "homo" is not comparable to "nigger," and such is exactly why I did not use any of the stronger anti-gay slurs that are so comparable).

    Looks like your going to have to ban me again, then, Mr. PC Diction Dictator.

    That is just flat-out bullshit. If anything, the "homo" slur is troublingly commonplace and acceptable. More to the point, it's highly juvenile - more associated with dumbass elementary school kids who don't even really understand what sexuality (straight, gay or otherwise) consists of in the first place, than with nasty bigots. I expect that you know what word they prefer as well as I do, and it is not "homo."

    This is just so much bullshit. Please, cite a single instance of anyone in the USA ever having been arrested for uttering the word "homo."
     
  9. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    24,690
    Sorry, I guess I haven't been on those threads. My apologies.
    And as promised, I apologize for not getting it. I'm weak at sarcasm.
    Someone who feels free to throw around the H word because he assumes everyone will understand that it's a joke surely understands that the phrase "smack someone upside the head" is used only as a joke.
    As I already noted, I am not the only person here who misunderstood you. So you can't blame this misunderstanding entirely on my age and sarcasm-impairment. After all, it was not I who banned you; this isn't my bailiwick.
    I understand. But when people turn on Dave Chapelle they expect lampooning and heavy sarcasm. When people log onto SciForums they expect something else. If you intend to use dry humor or sarcasm in a place where it's not anticipated, it can easily be misconstrued.
    Fair enough.
    I didn't ban you the first time. The admins restrict me to Linguistics and A&C, where there's very little trouble to misunderstand.
    I've already apologized, and having lived in Hollywood for ten years I understand the difficulty in figuring out what's acceptable and what's not.
    I don't feel like putting that much effort into supporting my own bad judgment. I'll just retract the statement.

    Again, I apologize. But again, your problem isn't just with me.

    I once lost a job for making remarks which I didn't even understand might be offensive, to which most of the people who heard them didn't give a second thought, but a handful of offended people overreacted. Such is life.
     
  10. quadraphonics Bloodthirsty Barbarian Valued Senior Member

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    I don't think that's true, in general.

    You're the only one who has publicly demonstrated any such misunderstanding. I am given to believe that there were others of the same mind in the secret mod fora, but I have no idea who they are, what exactly they thought, or what might have motivated that. And I do not expect to find out, frankly...

    I don't, that's why I mentioned Poe's Law in my last post. I do accept some responsibility here. I'm just surprised that anyone who has interacted with me in any substantive way here - as you have - wouldn't get it.

    I don't think that's particularly true, either. Okay, sure, this place isn't the equivalent of a sketch comedy show on a comedy cable network - but it's not the academy or a court of law, either. I don't see a shortage of lampooning, sarcasm, etc. around these parts, generally.

    Again, true enough, but you're the only one who has had the honor to show your face on the matter. And as far as that goes, it's good on you. At least you have the courage of your convictions, and can accept having made a mistake. That's a lot more than I can say for various of your peers.

    And, for the record, the two of us no longer have any problem, at this juncture.

    To be sure, I am a lot more careful about such things at work. Whole different scale of potential consequences for a misunderstanding. Although, in person the sarcasm tends to be a lot more obvious anyway...
     
  11. R1D2 many leagues under the sea. Valued Senior Member

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    Can we all get back to the "op" now...
     
  12. Stoniphi obscurely fossiliferous Valued Senior Member

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    Heh - I also think they did a very good job of jacking this thread, not that there is anything wrong with that.

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  13. Tiassa Let us not launch the boat ... Staff Member

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    Mod Hat — Note on jacking

    Mod Hat — Note on jacking

    That issue is, for the time being, settled.

    I've allowed this thread to continue against my better judgment, since, though I might be the law in S&S, I'm not God. Other people seem to be getting something out of the discussion.

    So let's leave questions of jacking alone. I'm part of the problem that led to that digression, and I'm happy to let them have their say in order to put it behind us.

    In other words: Nothing to see here, folks. Move along. Everyone go about your business.

    And I'll just leave things alone, otherwise.
     
  14. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

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    3,788
    Back to the topic of this thread on the 'Do's and Don't's of Sex in 2012' a co-worker shared with me today that her on-line male friend of long-standing has less time for chat these days since he got a woman with child.

    The interesting aspect is that while he is sharing a flat with this woman and admits to paternity, they are 'not in a relationship'. He's just helping her out for the sake of the child.

    That's a bit of a different take on cohabitation and pregnancy from years gone by. Living with but not in a relationship with the woman who is carrying your child. Seems to me there is considerable potential for complications pending.
     
  15. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    By "not in a relationship" you mean not having sex with each other anymore? But they have a child together, and I assume financial ties to each other and a shared living space. Who is kidding who here? If you were a woman looking for a man to hook up with, would you go home with this guy?

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  16. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

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    I gather that the pregnancy is a rather recent development, the child as yet not born. It just struck me as an unusual way to describe the present circumstance. On the one hand, it seems that the fellow is accepting some responsibility for paternity, but I am curious as to what both the parties concerned foresee as a suitable arrangement where relationship matters are concerned in the future.

    My answer to your question is an unqualified 'No.'

    Somewhat curious about how guys would feel about dating the woman in this 'non-relationship'. I understand that the potential of 'getting some' has a strange effect on the cognitive thought processes of some men.
     
  17. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    Let's see if I can put myself in this guys position. If I didn't want to be with this pregnant (with my child) woman. I'd be doing my best to hook her up with another guy. After all guys hook up with women with children all the time, but I have to admit a pregnant woman might be a challenge. But I have a lot of incentive if I want to keep the child support to a minimum or get rid of it altogether. (One can only hope she is good looking).

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  18. Asguard Kiss my dark side Valued Senior Member

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    Here is a question for you, what's more unethical, that situation, or a person who states on the day after there child's third birthday that they haven't actually loved there husband since the child was born and they want a divorce and get out of the house. And no to my knowledge neither had cheated, there was no fighting in the marriage (at least not with each other, she did her level best to alienate him from his family) it was just compleatly out of the blue. The part I can't understand is if she didn't love him that long how did they sleep together, I'm assuming they had sex more than once in 3 years so if she had no feelings for him how could she do that?
     
  19. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    6,493
    Suppose you hooked up for some sex, and it was good, so you kept doing it and before you know it there is a child on the way. Now at this point, it would be nice to know how they are supporting themselves. If your a woman without a job and maybe a limited education and you don't believe in abortion, there's a good chance you are going to try and make a go of a relationship. Then the realities start setting in, and you start wondering what you are doing, having a baby with a man you don't love. When do you tell him? Depends on whether you want to keep the baby or you want the father to keep the baby?
     
  20. Asguard Kiss my dark side Valued Senior Member

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    Umm that wasn't the situation at all sorry. They got married and about a year and a bit latter she fell pregnant and there is no way in hell he wouldn't have wanted that child wether they were officially together or not. In fact he wanted MORE kids and she was the one who didn't want any. If it was just about money she would have got it anyway, they were married there was no dispute as to her being his child, he wanted the child, if he had done the wrong thing his whole family would have killed him and not the least, he might be an idiot at times but he is a good person and he loves his daughter more than anything (you should see some of the comments he makes when she goes back to her mothers, he's pushing for 50% custody by the way which had also ment that he has had to get a new house because even though he could live with mum and dad, there room and they are both welcome the lawyer said she could use that against him even though the reason he was living there was she kicked him out of HIS home)

    So sorry try again, none of your senario fits, and I still can't get my head aroun the fact that she supposedly didn't love him since there daughter was born but slept with him for 3 years
     
  21. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    6,493
    Quite often, one doesn't have enough Info. to make assumptions, however if I was a bit wrong, I know you would provide more Info. Anyway, if she didn't want to be married to him anymore, and was willing to lie about not ever loving him. It was because she found telling him the truth to be much harder and might not accomplish the desired results she wanted. Now that she has taken that position she won't change her mind or back down on it. There's a very good chance he will never know the real reason she left him.
     
  22. Asguard Kiss my dark side Valued Senior Member

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    I do admit that's what I thought too when he first told me because lying made more sense to me than having sex with someone you don't love for that time frame. One night stand because they are hot sure but a committed monogamous relationship? My thought was either she got pissed at what happened at my sisters wedding in which case she's a spoiled brat or she found someone else though from what I know I haven't seen any evidence of this and I think it would be difficult concidering the fact that there situation is the reverse of the normal "husbands friends are husbands of wife's friends" it's him who has the long term wide friendship group through the scouts and family etc. if she was sleeping around I would think he would have found out as everyone's loyalties are more with him (she is going to find this out the day the divorce papers are signed, everyone's being nice to her because HE asked for it but the day everything's settled she is going to find out how much she has pissed EVERYONE off, almost feel sorry for her except for the harm she has done to my brother and my niece)
     
  23. KilljoyKlown Whatever Valued Senior Member

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    6,493
    Now I know why you seemed to have such an emotional response to this situation. But whatever the reason is, staying in a bad relationship would be much worse for everyone involved, than making a clean but hurtful break now rather than later. Let's hope both she an your brother can still be on good terms with their child's best interest being the goal.
     

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