Discussion in 'Science & Society' started by duendy, Nov 4, 2005.
ROFLMAO! Thanks Baron, you've just made my day.
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I never implied you didn’t know what you were talking about.
That is not so simple.
Oh, of course they are shit, but them being shit does not mean they cannot hurt you. If anything their shittiness makes them crueller, no? Hence why they can and will hurt you in the first place.
Saying it is far easier than doing it.
Yes, I don’t think finding a hobby or bringing it upon yourself would work well for physical abuse, actually.
Hmm, I don’t think being regularly hit should have to be a part of life, myself.
teachers who join in the bulyying should be fukin sacked on the fukin spot. a complete utter disgrace is what thewy are!
Look. bascilly WHO should ny child hve to be in a crappy hostile enivironment?
WHo is saying they MUST?
A child doesn't kno the game. s/he is surrounded by big people who mke out you can trust them. forthe child, 'school' is a given. it is a must do. so they go wit prents pressure to school, nd have that burden of 'plesing parents wit 'success' plus for the unlucy ons burden of being treated like utter crap
i am saying it is an abomination to put ANY CHILD THRU THIS!..........
EVERYONE want pleasure. even bmax...int that right dude. or do you enjoy yer arthritus??...NOone wants fukin pain. so whys it adults hen hearing of kid's pain claim it's good for them and thy shoul stick it out..?...NO. whatthey WANT is being able to learn in NON-violent atmosphere!!!
Duendy, your rant is unnecessary. If you've read the thread you can see that no one, even the mean ol' grinch Baron Max, thinks bullying is good! However, it happens, so the question remains .....what can anyone do about it? Your ranting adds nothing to that, so please add something to the thread in the form of suggestions as to how to SOLVE the problem, not just tell us that bullying is bad.
While this is correct the fact remains that you have not added 'suggestions as to how to solve the problem', so this is slightly contradictory.
Never the less, your statement is quite apt.
look, you ignore-ing incompetent. again and agin i have offered suggestions....i eve replid to yor similar accustion above. don blame me that you can see tem or understand. tis YOURproblem our lack of absorbtion not mine
to emind you. i am aying fuk wid your answer which i self-dfence ad 'the world is like this get used to it'..that i YOU myth hich mot likely you'll blieve tll yo snuff it. THAT IS YOURSE> ANY CHILD DOESN@ HAVE TO SUFFER YOUR MYOPIC MYTH> they need action.....
i have told about 'cyberschools' (USA) where childrn can be taken out of hostile environemnts to learn and enjoy learning. YES?!
i have told about 'Notschool' (UK) a similar possibility
I have explianed how a new school has been opened in UK whre chilren who have ben bullied can attend. i heard it is goo and children thre feel much beter. o course they all wll have somthing very deep and personal in common
so AGIN there i have presented three fruitful posible options----and can i aslo add 'homeschooling' too for those with parents it free time
trying to deal wit bullying wit the actual schools it ocurs in can be all fuked up it politics. with schol wanting to keep good imge and then child victim become scapegoat....fuck wid tht shit. et the KID OUT of all that shit!!
Sometimes adults are bullied in the workplace. You can look up workplace mobbing or workplace bullying. There are adults who are traumatized and do not want to go to another workplace ever. They claim that they have post traumatic stress disorder. In these situations people are being bullied, made fun of in hopes that they will quit. Or that they will lose their cool and someone else will be promoted instead, etc. etc. There are mean cliques in workplaces just like in school. I'm sorry, but you can't always pull out. Just like school is forced on kids, work is forced on adults and sometimes you just have to deal with it. or end up homeless.
Also, these adults find it very hard to prove their cases. But of course, there is no physical violence but the verbal is pretty tough. As for physical violence, I would suggest getting a camera somehow and recording it. Again, maybe schools can have a durable undectable bullycam for kids to use when it comes to that.
NO. it is NOT same.
yes. bullying is bullying, but the adult has a CHOICE AS AN ADULT.......
a child trusts adults. uually what they say goes. they have prssure from Stae and parents the MUST attend school. here in UK
parents hav been sent to prison if cild has been truanting to long!
Also there is State stigmtization of children and enforced druging, for those kids who cant wont dont fit into its indoctrinating schools
A child has a right and freedom NOto hve to be coerced to try and learn in hostile environemnts.
the fact that thisshit goes on in ADULT WORKPLACES ETC SAYS MORE ABOUT THE CULTURE THESE SCHOOLS EXISTS IN
Duendy, you've given three wonderful options, and a fourth, too. So, with those options in place, the bullying should just disappear, right? So now that you've solved the issue, why are you still upset and angry about it? You and/or any kids who are bullied should just select one of your options and ...voila'... problem solved. And the world becomes a wonderful place filled with love and happiness and joy and learning.
oh jeeezus gawwwwd. wht a pessimist. first we have to share ideas. wht you want i do right now. singlehandedly pluck all kids being bulied out of school. not likely
orrrr should i lke you. open up a thread abot bullying and harp on--likeyou--about how it is the 'real' world and 'hey kids arm yourselves'
if ONE CHILD looks at some the possibl ideas i have outlined and others have (NOT YOURS!) and get a powr to intitate their destiny and get hell out of hostile fuk up school-prison complx. job done
wish i'd known!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_
My mistake. Sorry.
I realize that...I never said it was I easy (at least I don't think I did...)
Seeing their worth helps you see that you are worth more then them, hence what they may say do now will mean nothing in your life later, as they will be serving you in a resteraunt in the future. But if you do let it hurt, and consume your life, it will hurt.
Agian, I know that.
Yes, I'm sorry, I should have said that I was mostly takling about verbal abuse/teasing(ex. throwing paper in someones hair) from the beginning
To each his own. I, and others I know who have been through what I have eventually learned their own worth and just bore it until it stopped. Yes, it stoppoing isn't a garuntee, but as most bullies aren't the most interesting people, when they find you disinterested, or asking for it, they find a new toy.
Just so you know, what I went through wasn't some pussy bullying that everyone goes through. It was full out bullying (without the gaging up and beating me, though the ganging up happened) driving me to near suicide. I say this not for pity, or looking for understanding, but so that you see I'm not just preaching crap I've been taught. I lived through it, and this is my advice. Maybe I was just lucky.
SO, considering what you've been through, what would you do if yor child was gtting bullied at school?
(note: I'm have no children, and probably won't for a long time, so I can't answer as I could if I did have children, or were, at least, an adult)
Hmm, good question. Probably resist the urge to beat up the kids doing it.
...then I'd comfort my kid and make them feel as worthy as possible. Whether this would do anything depends on the person. I'd tell them of my own expiriences, being as honest as possible. When someone knows that someone else has been through what they are going through they trust and believe them more, espacially if it were a child. From that they could learn. Or not, agian depending on what kind of person they are.
I'd keep them busy, and try and make them as happy and as comfterble at home as possible, so that they at least have a safe haven. I'd talk to them, and never critizise them. Were I ever to meet the bullies I'd be nice to them. I'd encourage my child to be better then the bullies, so they can at least have that, the knowledge and proof that they are better, not just words. I'd tell teachers, but I might hesistate to, seeing as how they usually make things worse. I'd also find out why the kids are bullying my child(if my kid knows)...I could then work from there. I'd teach them when to fight back, how to retort and when, to pick their battles, just incase it comes to that.
Overall just give them support, not pressure them, and listen with no judgment. Becuase I know I hated people passing judgment on what they didn't understand.
If of course I see why children are bullying them, and its a valid reason (they're mean, rude, huge ego, resisting friendship harshly) then I'd just have to teach my child the do's and don'ts of society....but I think I would've done that already.
Were the bullies to beat up my child, steal, or physically torment them, I would have to resort to telling authorities since if I were to even go near the bullies I could get in trouble, without helping my child. (I wouldn't be going to them to beat them, but I'd talk to them) Actually, physical abuse is very hard to battle, short of moving to a new school. Makes you feel kinda helpless...
Probably the best advice ever. I hate it when the all-knowing adults say 'just ignore it'. Would a principal or teacher 'ignore' a student who was belittling and physically abusing them?
Running to the authorities isn't a sure fix, either. If you are having trouble with just one bully, then perhaps it would work. But when dealing with gangs, or large sections of the school population, there is only one option. To make yourself a hard target. Because bullies only pick on those who appear to be soft targets.
Mountainhare, when they come at you in groups of five, a child who is small for his age does not have the option of making himself a "hard target."
I just don’t think it is very easy to “not let it hurt”, if it hurts it hurts, you can’t stop that, you can try but I don’t think it will work because it is going to hurt on some level no matter what.
Another thing, if you did try to ignore the verbal abuse/teasing so as to make it stop the chances are that the bullies are just going to become more vicious, cruel and constant to try and get a reaction out of you, and if that still didn’t work they would most likely get physically abusive.
I do not think people should have to just bare it. So it’s a part of life, so what? Fuck it, everything is a part of life, it doesn’t mean we should have to put up with continual shit when we could change it.
Or they just get more persistent and violent until they achieve the desired outcome.
Ok, but if you haven’t been physically bullied then your advice wouldn’t really apply to people that have, would it? I mean, you can’t just ignore it, or ask for it, to try and make it stop, can you?
You can’t stop physical bullying by yourself, the odds and the majority are against you.
Once it starts it is near impossible to stop, which is why parents need to instil some fucking respect and morals in their children before they become little bullying bastards, because it’s no good afterwards, is it?
You've got it down pretty well, Nysse. The bullies will escalate the conflict no matter what it takes. The teachers who say that you can stop the conflict by ignoring them show themselves to be utter morons. They do indeed hate being ignored. That's why they beat you up for ignoring them.
Nysse, I agree with pretty much everything you've said. I think you have a key point there. Its the parents and upbringing that make the big diffrence. Parents need to be more aware of their children when they're young, becuase thats when they're becoming who they be. Bullying can start or be stopped from home. Of course some kids are just assholes....
The thing, Nysse, that we always disagree on is how a childs mentallity, and the psychological aspects of bullying can make a difference. I guess a persons experiences can give one different veiw points. I agree with what you say, but I also agree with me (duh....Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!.
I find its not so much that they hate being ignored, but that they find it funny that you're trying to ignore them, so they push harder. Ignoring was the stupidest advice anyone ever gave me.
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The problem is, if you ignore them they bash you up, if you tell them to piss off they bash you up, if you try and reason with them they bash you up. They don’t care for what reason it is that they bash you up, they are going to do it no matter what, the fact that you even exist is good enough as far as they are concerned.
As in you think not allowing it to hurt you is possible, and I do not?
I, for instance, do not think it is possible to “not let it hurt” because I was not able to.
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