Yup, that's just humanity. The question is, do you get back up after your collapse? You must, regardless of whether you THINK you can or not. I want to congratulate you on surviving, but I don't know if I can do so when you espouse what you do. I want to say "good job because you're really trying." but I don't know that you are, in fact it seems the opposite, that you're still just obsessed with blaming people for the stuff that only YOU can deal with. I know that sounds harsh to you, and I want to see it some other way really cuz I don't like thinking poorly of people who've been through the shit you have. I simply can't though, as it seems to me you haven't taken your life back and continue to play your role as a victim, finding abuse and horror at every turn. Again, as I've said a few times... I hope I'm wrong. I've called you a wimp because you seem to refuse to get back up. You've allowed them to damage you NOW, when the abuse is long past.... you blame the world for your problems instead of accepting that regardless of who imparted them upon you, you're the one stuck to deal with them. IMO, that's wimpy. It's nothing personal, but said somewhat more vindictively than I might have otherwise since you stated straight up I'm sub-human and directly insulted my beautiful, wonderful children and wife by saying I shouldn't breed, which just annoys the piss out of me in what it represents of an attitude. I heard something earlier today that I'm trying to remember but can't help but slaughter. I wish I remembered the exact phrasing. It was so pertinent. Something like "as long as you see monsters instead of people, you'll never understand blah blah". Damnit. It was said so perfectly. I can't remember it. Grr. Basically it's what I said before, as long as you continue to marginalize people by thinking of them as sub-human, you continue to damage your own humanity. Something like that. Bah. Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it if I couldn't get it right.