Limericks: Preferably humorous

Discussion in 'Art & Culture' started by Dinosaur, Jul 3, 2014.

  1. Michael 345 Bali tonight Valued Senior Member

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    6,511
    He woke with a fart in the tent
    He looked and the tent pole was bent
    He went out to the wood
    And what happened he stood
    In some brown stuff with scent

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    Cheese roll for lunch
     
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  3. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    The scent of the brown stuff was not as bad
    As the stinky cheese roll he had
    That cheese scent in the tent
    Was surely not heaven sent
    His nose knows it was sad.

    <>
     
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  5. Michael 345 Bali tonight Valued Senior Member

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    Tough for a getting old mind
    As age to your brain is not kind
    The stuff in your brain
    It slips down the drain
    As the brain begins to unwind

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    Age 76
     
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  7. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    Went to the kitchen for chili
    Poured a cup of coffee
    Back in the bedroom
    I fell into gloom
    When I realized I did not get my spaghetti.

    <>
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2018
    Michael 345 likes this.
  8. Dr_Toad It's green! Valued Senior Member

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    2,527
  9. Michael 345 Bali tonight Valued Senior Member

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    6,511
    It's easy to bear
    A nice Camembert
    What stinks up your nose
    Are Jalapenos
    It's then you need fresh air

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    Bonus

    Q: What's the best cheese to tempt a bear out of the woods?
    A: Cam-on-bear (camembert)
     
  10. Michael 345 Bali tonight Valued Senior Member

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    6,511
    I owed a ode
    To Dr Toad
    The little green amphibian
    From the Caribbean???
    Or just down the road

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  11. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    Do you think a bear would
    Come on out of the wood
    For some nice Jalapenos
    Depends on which way the wind blows
    He would smell it if he could.

    <>
     
  12. Michael 345 Bali tonight Valued Senior Member

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    6,511
    If a bear had a bare wood
    Do you think he should
    Flash it about?
    A bear who would flout
    Such a asset cannot be good

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  13. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    Tho I try try try try
    I have to cry cry cry cry
    I can't get no whiskey
    I can't get no coffee
    Have to say goodby bye bye bye bye bye.

    <>
     
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2018
  14. Dr_Toad It's green! Valued Senior Member

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    2,527
    Limericks! Not country music.

    Hell, I'm surprised your dog didn't run off in your truck with your girlfriend and the rest of the beer...

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  15. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    Try singing it to the tune of Satisfaction.

    <>
     
  16. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    My dog drove away in my truck
    My girlfriend was in the bed. What luck!
    Now I'm sleeping in a log
    I sure do miss that dog
    I need someone to pull me out of the muck.

    <>
     
  17. Dr_Toad It's green! Valued Senior Member

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    I can't make that work, somehow..
     
  18. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    My dog does not like beer.

    <>
     
  19. Dr_Toad It's green! Valued Senior Member

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    Mine does. He likes laying under the bench when I'm target shooting, and he likes barbecue and trucks. I don't know if he likes my girl, 'cause I don't have one. C'est la vie.
     
  20. StrangerInAStrangeLand SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    ///
    La vie.

    <>
     
  21. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    4,556
    If I could write an epic poem
    In limerick form that would show 'em,
    But my attention span
    Is much shorter than
    What's required for me to grow 'em.
     
  22. Dr_Toad It's green! Valued Senior Member

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    2,527
    Very nice. I might change the second line to scan a bit better: "In Limerick form that'd show 'em".

    Just my editor coming out, swinging wildly. I can't even claim that part of me has a hat...
     
  23. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,556
    I actually had that and changed it. I guess it doesn't pay to over-think these things.
     

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