Same here. Except a g/f not a husband. haha. But I bet if you happened to inadvertently find someting incriminating against him, you'd probably come undone wouldn't you? Parents snooping on their children for valid reasons is all fine and dandy. Children are subordinates if you will. Spouses are equal. I don't even like going through a woman's purse even when she gives me permission.
I don't know call me crazy here.... I honestly have much better things to do then go snooping around but really...who cares if you got nothing to hide. :shrug: I mean he ain't going to find much in my purse other than.... A brush Lip Gloss Loose change at the bottom My wallet with my ID
How about if we call it "monitoring" ? - if you read these posts, no one wants to be a snoop, everyone talks about having things "feel right". From where and what does that feeling come, in practice? Does any man here believe that the only stuff a close girlfriend, someone whose happiness in life depends on him, knows about him is what he overtly tells her or shows her - and in just those terms? What seems to be the case is that the definition of "snooping" is flexible in practice. It's not necessarily snooping if my wife reads my email, for example, or checks my bank balances - she has all my passwords, and occasional reason to know some stuff contained therein. But she does not, in fact, read my personal stuff, because it wouldn't "feel right". And I know she doesn't - any more. I think years ago she did, and part of the current state of "feeling right" comes from long-past reassurances that derived from having the option of what would now (and probably then) be snooping and a source of discomfort all around.
But there are so many things you can not trust a person about. Its not always cheating with another person. It could be something like EATING ALL THE DAMN CHOCOLATE CHIPS AGAIN!!!! So, do I search his room for the bag? No. Or it could be something like a trusting a person to go get pizza but coming back 4 hrs later smelling of booze w/o the pizza. Do you search their car for beer cans? No, you pour a pitcher of water in the middle of their bed and let them think they wet themselves. I trust him to get pizza and he trusts me not to mess with his bed.
oh come on. I don't trust my husband around choc chips and he doesn't trust me around cheesecake. I think he would have every reason to search my room for a cake pan if it came up missing. As long as he didn't look in my purse.:shy:
I am wondering the same thing myself....Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! What is so sacred or secretive in your purses? What if you weren't around and he needed $20.00 in a hurry or something. Would he be in big shit if he went into your purse?
I guess it's just one of those personal preference things. I just don't like going through purses. Just like I will never, ever take a crap with the door open and her in the bathroom with me; regardless of how intimate and comfortable we get with one another. Some don't mind riding the porcelain throne with the door open. I am not one of those individuals.
My best friend used to always go through my and our other friends purses and backpacks back in high school and he wouldn't even be looking for anything, I used to get mad just because I felt like I was supposed to be mad, some guy digging through my stuff, but by my junior year I realized what am I mad for there's nothing worth hiding in there. He'd be seeing stuff he's seen all before. I guess some women might be embarrassed by a tampon or something. It's rude to do so without permission, but if you have the go ahead... :shrug:
You lose privacy when you live with a house full of people. My bedroom isn't private since my husband and kids are always in there. I can't even take a bath without someone wanting to talk to me. Moms give and sacrifice. So my purse is my last bit of my space. If I have money in there, its mine. If I have gum in there its mine. mine mine mine And if my husband is in my purse for reasons other than taking my money/gum, then there will be hell to pay for him not trusting me. He has no reason not to and I would find it offensive.
Eh, why should I? So far I've been always lucky with my partners ;D Not only that..maybe it's just better if I don't know everything, right?
Why would any guy want to look in a woman's hand bag? http://www.sciforums.com/showpost.php?p=2213521&postcount=79
You have to start by being honest with yourself. Many people are not. But it's very difficult to earn someone's trust when you start off not being worthy of it. A relationship that starts off with dishonesty and distrust is going to be shaped by the effect of that dishonesty and distrust. It will probably always have a large component of dysfunctionality that will be difficult to reshape. The people will often be better off making a clean start with someone else after they become different, better people--especially since it's unlikely that both will improve at the same rate. Of course everyone makes their own choices and some people are "settlers." They "settle" for something that's become comfortable through familiarity. Well there ya go. Until you reach that point you haven't exactly matured and your relationships are not going to be all that great. As my favorite Demotivator poster says, "The only common factor in all of your failed relationships is you." Eh, there are cultures in which loud fights are the norm. As long as the kids know their parents have love and commitment, the rest is just what they learn to accept as the normal dynamics of relationships. We have this thing in our Anglo-American culture that it's not permissible to express strong feelings, especially negative ones. Everyone should spend more time with Jewish, Italian or Latin American people and get over that. It's not healthy. As for breakups, well we weren't even close to married. Once you're married you have to decide whether staying together and hating each other will be better for the kids than going your separate ways. Kids aren't stupid. None. They were about who we are. We helped each other sort out our shortcomings from our annoying but mostly harmless eccentricities, and decide which of them might be worth trying to overcome. Thirty years later we're still doing it and we still fight occasionally, but they're more focused, more productive and shorter. Yeah, that's a difficult issue in the "pedocracy" that is modern America. In many ways children have rights that trump the rights of their parents and even the adult citizenry at large. Yet somehow parents and the whole damned "village" are expected to raise them to be good citizens with Big Nanny applying her Wal-Mart style "one size fits all" laws to individual families. I remember what I was like as a kid, and by most standards I was a fairly "good" kid. Privacy is a right and rights come with maturity. All children do not mature at the same rate. Kids who post pictures of themselves in sexual situations on the internet and then complain because their parents find them and punish them are not ready for the right to privacy. My wife hasn't carried a purse in 25 years. She decided that since men don't carry them, it is clearly possible to get along without one, and it sure decreases one's chance of being mugged. Keys and money in her pockets, everything else in the glove compartment, which I often have to search to find something she needs. Many of us have a bad habit that we don't mind our spouse helping us curtail. That's one of the things that comes with marriage. I understand that the privacy that Americans (and a few other Western countries) hold so dear is cultural, not a universal human trait. One of my Indian friends took a job as a consultant and went off on his first week-long business trip. When he returned home his wife was shaking and crying after being alone in their apartment every night for a week. In her whole life she'd never been alone for more than a few hours.
