Is trust earned or learned?

yep, so true fraggle.

[video=youtube;4lCzBAQ2PLk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lCzBAQ2PLk[/video]

I once believed in fairy tales too..............

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Fairies not believing in fairy tales! What has the world come to? Man is mortal. The Father (whom art in Heaven) is immortal and all knowing, is that your understanding?

 

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I believe in fairies.

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Make no mistake about it, the bible is riddled with stories of how women were oppressed by the men of that time. There are parables that place women in a favorable light however, and Jesus showed women equity. Whether ppl believe he was the Messiah or an ordinary man bringing peace...he saw women as equals deserving of respect.

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But specifically is there sexism in Genesis Chapter 24? There could be a degree, but only that the servant seems to eye up the young girl before talking to her. But surely the feeling of attraction is separated from sexism. Like he didn't ask each and every young girl coming there to give him a drink of water did he? So was that him being unfair to the others? For it wasn't equal opportunity.

 

Yes, there was sexism. All thoughtout the bible...there are constant references to a woman's virginity. Ever notice that? But, nothing about the importance of a man's virginity. Why is that?

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Just like today, women are judged for their sexual past far more than men. So, yeah...it's sexist. As is a lot of the stories of the Bible.

But they just didn't call it sexist back then. Women just hoped and prayed a man would choose her, so she could have babies and keep her status in the community. Thank goodness I wasn't born back in that time period. Although, they didn't know any different, I guess.

I know you mean well with the story, robittybob.

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I don't mean to sound like a jerk.

 

Sorry this probably should be more in the Sexism thread but please excuse me for bringing this up in this thread.

OK they mention in Gen 24 that Rebekah was virgin, and she is chosen for Isaac but we are not told if Isaac was a virgin, so that is sexist.
I can understand your reasoning regarding that.

Well what can I say? I keep thinking, if, as we do believe that man evolved from a common ancestor of the Apes, could you imagine there were times in that history where there was what we would describe today as unacceptable behaviour. The Apes have quite a variety of sexual behaviours. We could look that up in Wikipedia. From this animal background humans are gradually developing their "civilized behaviour".
It could therefore be argued that Man has to go through a period of development. The stage described in Genesis is one of them.

We now are faced with applying the Christ-like standard of not committing adultery, even adultery in your mind. Does that prove the acceptable behaviour bar just keeps on rising?

We were once upon a time animals, after this man and woman, now Christians and in future angels (sons/daughters of God).
Is that evolution? Certainly evolving behavioural standards.

 

[video=youtube;1XXcCyqp5o8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XXcCyqp5o8[/video]

 

Trust is precious. I value it highly.

 

lol

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One of the main ‘’challenges’’ I have in ‘learning’ to trust, is how to deal with people who say one thing, do another. Do you cut someone off like this right away? Do you continue to give chances?

I think the reason many people don’t trust people of faith…is many just outright lie as to who they are…

I’ve grown SO weary of fake people, these days.

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There’s an old saying…’’I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.’’ ~ Kurt Cobain

Unfortunately, far too many in this life, think the exact opposite.

 

Wegs, by reading you posts, a person could be led to perceive you to be somewhat religious or a person "of faith". Do not most religions/faiths posit something on the lines of, "...turn the other cheek"?
The " main ‘’challenges’’ I have in ‘learning’ to trust," as you put it, should be the same to "distrust" or label someone "fake".
Would mistaken perceptions, misunderstandings, prior experiences or prejudices, possibly be included in said "challenges"?

The reasons "...many people don’t trust people of faith…is many just outright lie as to who they are…". Do only "people of faith", "just outright lie as to who they are…"?
Seems, to me, that anyone could possibly, " just outright lie as to who they are…".

Being " SO weary of fake people ", to me, would seem to be a "state of mind". It is up to the person in any "state of mind" to take control of or change their "state of mind".

The saying you attributed to Kurt Cobain makes a lot of sense. Your statement referring to it : "Unfortunately, far too many in this life, think the exact opposite.", seems, to me, to be rooted in your "state of mind".

As far as people who seem to "think the exact opposite.", there are, possibly people who do not even "think" or at least do not even "think" of things of that nature.
Stating a "code of moral ethics" or a "philosophy of life" or "belonging to a particular religion/faith" is one thing. Actually consciously and conscientiously practicing those stated "ethics/philosophies/religions/faiths" is up to each and every one of us, as an individual.

As an individual, we can only choose, for ourselves, whether or not we "practice what we preach".

I have often heard the saying : "Live and let live". I take that, in some respects, to mean that I should not let other people determine or control my "state of mind" or "life" and that I should not expect nor have the rights to try to determine or control theirs.

wegs, possibly, just relax, start each day with a few calm, serene, happy or comforting thoughts and tell yourself to only allow positive energies to be absorbed by and radiated by you.
There is a saying that : "You reap what you sow." If you dwell on the negatives that you perceive in life you will probably sow negative energies, and have very little hope of reaping anything other than negative results.
If, however, you maintain positive perceptions and a positive attitude, and you only sow positive energies - you will reap positive benefits.

Facing up to and overcoming "challenges" in life, which can take hard work and dedication, is one of the aspects of life that will only make you stronger and more able to appreciate and enjoy life.

 

Thanks - I agree, no one is perfect. I need forgiveness, and I give forgiveness. We need to talk and get to understand our differences, and bring in mediation when it all turns to custard.
There is real good advice in the above two posts. I'll take the advice. I'll listen to any good advice I'm given.

 

Thank you for your kind words, really you guys.

@ dumbest man on earth…you need a new username, me thinks.

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You are rather quite wise, and your message here wasn’t well received at first when I read it. Lol But, I thought about it. It’s been a rough few years for me, personally and professionally…but, sometimes, I tend to put everyone in the same bucket…under a cloud of suspicion, based on a few people (in the past) who hurt me. Kind of stupid, when you logically work through it.

This line above that you posted, especially hit home:

''I have often heard the saying : "Live and let live". I take that, in some respects, to mean that I should not let other people determine or control my "state of mind" or "life" and that I should not expect nor have the rights to try to determine or control theirs.''

Anyway, thank you.

@ fraggle, I’m not even addressing that ‘duh’ comment. :=PP Thank you for your words of wisdom too. You always manage to say the right thing…at the right time. Thank you, too.

@ Robittybob, thank you for being my... friend.

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The above advice was spot on, indeed.

Something I’ve learned as it relates to trust. No man/woman …is an island. We all struggle with the very same things in this life. We’re all more alike, than we are different. Thank you, again. <3

 

@ wegs - And thank you for being my friend and the time you've spent talking too. Not long till September maybe things will pick up by then.

 

Trust is earned

 

Even earned trust can be broken. Mistakes are made and the wrong things are written. So those who once trusted become un-trusted (deservedly or not, how long do you want to argue?).

But those of us who believe in Judgement don't take it lightly. If I vow to be trustworthy, that is my standard. But what I find is even though my intentions are pure, it is the perception of my actions, that others judge me on.
I can only hope My Lord is a fair judge and examines my heart, to see if there was any deceit in there. I believe my heart is clean, but for sure it feels so broken.

 

Trust can certainly be broken.

 

Earned