Igloo toilets

Discussion in 'The Cesspool' started by Leetha, Mar 2, 2007.

  1. Leetha Guest

    Where do Eskimos go to the toilet? Igloos look too small to include a bathroom, but if they went outdoors at night they might be eaten by a polar bear which would be attracted by the smell.
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  3. vslayer Registered Senior Member

    a polar bear would be attracted to that smell?
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  5. leopold Valued Senior Member

    interesting question.
    i would assume they would cut or chop a hole in the ice.
    but seeing as it is really cold the stuff might freeze in a short while so they might just go outside and relieve themselves anywhere.
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  7. globenstein Registered Senior Member

    Eskimos live in houses and use snowmobiles. They still hunt but they don't live in igloos.
  8. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

    But they used to. They probably had a corner that they did it in and then covered the mess with snow, the smell would have been subdued by the cold.
  9. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    People always tell children here not to eat the yellow snow.
  10. invert_nexus Ze do caixao Valued Senior Member

    The perfect segue into Frank Zappa lyrics:

    (well, right about that time people
    A fur-trapper (who was strictly from commercial)
    Had the unmitigated audacity to jump up from behind my igloo (peekaboo) )
    And he started into whippin on my favorite baby seal
    With a lead-filled snowshoe)

    I said, with a
    With a lead filled snowshoe
    He said, peekaboo
    I said, with a
    With a lead filled snowshoe
    He said, peekaboo
    He went right upside the head of my favorite baby seal
    He went whap with a lead-filled snowshoe, and
    He hit him on the nose and hit him on the fin, and he
    That got me just about as evil as an eskimo boy can be. so I bent down
    And I reached down, and I scooped down and I gathered up a generous
    Mitten-ful of the deadly yellow snow

    The deadly yellow snow, from right there where the huskies go!

    Whereupon I proceeded to take that mittenful of the deadly yellow snow
    Crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous
    Circular motion hitherto unknown to the people of this area, but destined
    To take the place of the mudshark in your mythology
    Here it goes,the circular motion, now rub it!

    (here fido)

    And then
    In a fit of anger
    I pounced

    And I pounced again

    Great googly moogly!

    I jumped up and down on the chest of the him

    I injured
    The fur trapper

    Well he was very upset, as you can understand
    And rightly so, because the
    Deadly yellow snow crystals had
    Deprived him of his

    And he stood up, and he looked around, and he said

    I cant see
    I cant see
    Oh, woe is me
    I cant see

    Well.....you know
    I cant see

    He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my right eye
    He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my other eye
    And the husky wee-wee
    I mean the doggie wee-wee
    Has blinded me
    And I cant see

    Well, the fur-trapper stood there, with his arms outstretched across the
    Frozen white wasteland, trying to figure out what he was going to do about
    His deflicted eyes. and it was at that precise moment that he remembered
    And ancient eskimo legend, wherein it is written (on whatever it is that
    They write it on up there) that if anything bad ever happens to your eyes
    As the result of some sort of conflict with anyone named
    The only way you can get it fixed up is to go

    Trudging across the tundra
    Mile after mile
    Trudging across the tundra

    Right down to the parish of st. alphonzo
    Kurschybee likes this.
  11. phlogistician Banned Banned

    A corner? In an igloo? Man, yould be up all night trying to find it.
  12. leopold Valued Senior Member

    ah, the great apostraphe album yes?

    you wouldn't happen to know where i might procure a copy would you?
  13. invert_nexus Ze do caixao Valued Senior Member


    Unfortunately, you need a membership and apparently, they just closed down open registrations which mean they won't be open for another month or so...

    I could, I suppose, send you an invite. You'd have to promise to keep your ratio up though as it could affect my membership.

    Here's on in APE format:
  14. Roman Banned Banned

    The 'honey bucket'. What a euphemism.
    Last edited: Mar 3, 2007
  15. draqon Banned Banned

    actually polar bears use the poop to warm themselves up...so the bears dont eat up Eskimos because the bears will know there is warm poop to come to warm them up. And no I didn't make this up, its thermal conservation.
  16. spidergoat Liddle' Dick Tater Valued Senior Member

    Well, I had to know, so I did a google search and found...

    Close but no cigar. Then...

    The work after an iglu is built

    When the other inside work is completed, a gothic shape opening of approximately 70 cm high is made in front, and always lower than the iglerk (bed platform). The reminder of the iglu interior surface becomes the floor.
    Next, the man builds a smaller iglu leaning on to the big one. The same building method is used. This iglu will be the porch, shed, refrigerator, deep-freeze, etc. It’s floor will be approximately 10 cm lower than the floor of the main iglu and it will be less insulated. Then the wind-break is built. This wind-break, two or three blocks in length and height, has a form of an extended semi-circle. While the man, and possibly a helper, are building from the inside, his wife and daughters work outside shoveling snow onto the walls. Soft, or pulverized snow (shaaksak) is used for this. A layer of 30 to 40 cm of this snow is shoveled onto the base of the iglu wall. This layer will gradually become thinner until nothing is shoveled onto the roof. This snow layer insulates the iglu.
    The frame of the snow-shovel (puagri) was made from the caribou antler. Pieces of seal skin were attached to this frame to make the blade of the shovel. The base of the frame was sharpened and the shovel had two handles. One handle was on the top and the other was in the middle. Both hands were used for shoveling. More recent home-made snow shovels are made with thin, light wood.
    Sometimes another small shelter is constructed where the porch leans to the main iglu. Its form will be an open half circle on approximately 1 meter in diameter. It serves as a bathroom.


    So, it seems the small igloo we are used to seeing is probably for hunting and not as permanent. They actually built groups of igloos that were connected inside, with rooms that served different purposes.
    Ethernos D Grace likes this.
  17. Kurschybee Registered Member

    Totally perfect. Love it!!

  18. Curious layman Registered Member

    Eskimos never actually lived in igloos, they used animal hide tents. The igloos were for use in emergency/hunting but were actually rarely used. (According to Stephen fry, from QI)
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2019
    Ethernos D Grace likes this.

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