I am a survivor of Spontaneous Human Combustion

Discussion in 'The Cesspool' started by FrankBaker, May 13, 2014.

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  1. [I do not quite know where I should put this thread, but hopefully, I chose the right one.]

    I am Frank Baker.

    You might have seen my Unexplained Files documentary on the Science Channel last year. I also had an article made about me on Huffington Post. It was a very harrowing experience, and I think that this is something that needs to be explored more.

    From my experience some things are certain ;
    Enzymes do not denature at high temperatures while they are inside the body. My doctor even agreed with me on this, saying if that were the case then it would not have gone so far as to causing an internal flame which became visible on the outside of my body. The doctor had diagnosed me with ''Partial Spontaneous Combustion'', and told me that I had burnt from the inside out, completely thrawting the common explanation for this phenomenon...

    I think we can also agree that enzymes are not broken down by a chemical imbalance.

    Science ignores what challenges the common knowledge, but if we keep that attitude up, we will never learn anything new.
    There is an entire documentary about my harrowing experience. It was on the ''Unexplained Files'' and there are also some news articles which mirror my story. As a war veteran I can say this was the most terrifying experience of my life and this has happened to me three times so you cannot say that I was caught on fire from an external source because external sources of fire do not cause burns from the inside out...

    PM me for more details, I can only give so much info in public...
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  3. Balerion Banned Banned

    Oh, Magical Realist is gonna love you...
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  5. Gremmie "Happiness is a warm gun" Valued Senior Member

    LMAO... Was just thinking that...
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  7. (???)
  8. origin In a democracy you deserve the leaders you elect. Valued Senior Member

    Hi Frank Baker, I had the same problem my name is Penis Onfire.

    I assume this is a joke, if not is sure as hell should be.
  9. This is not a joke. I have been mentioned in several news articles and there is an entire ''Unexplained Files'' documentary where I describe my experience.
  10. Read-Only Valued Senior Member

    Then you might as well try elsewhere. 99% of the people here are NOT going to buy your stupid story!

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

  11. I will ask you two questions ;

    #1 - what warrants such disbelief?

    #2 - what warrants you to label the description of my experience as you put it; a ''stupid story''?

    You don't elaborate, but I do feel it is insulting towards me.
  12. Walter L. Wagner Cosmic Truth Seeker Valued Senior Member


    are you a sock for gaiagirl?

    this is posted on numerous forums. can you provide evidence? none given on those forums. this simply repeats what's already posted; could be by a robot-troll.
  13. Read-Only Valued Senior Member

    It was intended to be insulting - because your stupid story is COMPLETELY insulting to people with a scientific background!

    Feel free to leave us now!

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  14. Russ_Watters Not a Trump supporter... Valued Senior Member

    Why can't you give more details in public?
  15. AlexG Like nailing Jello to a tree Valued Senior Member

    He's a sock of a poster named Bluespike, both on the Science Forum and Science Forums.
  16. Arne Saknussemm trying to figure it all out Valued Senior Member

    Of course Frank is somebody’s sock puppet, and I thought of GaigaiGirl too, Walter. Very well could be. Welcome back, Gai!

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

    Anyway, I looked at the youtube link Walter provided, and it really is true: you can observe a lot just by watching.

    The video starts with: 'Frank Baker is a decorated Vietnam war veteran. He has two purple hearts and a gallantry medal.'

    Hmm. Now, I was never in the army, let alone in a war, but I know they don’t hand out purple hearts for getting stuck out in the rain, or even necessarily for being on fire. And gallantry! You’re a real American hero, Frank. So really? 'your closest brush with death wasn't on the battlefield!? It was 'right there in Vermont'!?' Why all the medals then? What happened in Vietnam? A clerical error?

    Then in the next scene, a re-enactment, admittedly, Frank bursts in to flames!

    Now recently, I had the bad luck of having some red-hot charcoal briquettes land on my seat. (Long story). I jumped up like a scalded pussy cat because I saw that if I scooted away across the cushion the coals would roll under my bum.

    So what’s Frank doing –sitting there-casually brushing at the roaring flames climbing up his left side like it’s lint? The man may be a gallant war hero, but boy he is certainly no actor!

    Which raises the question, if this man is really Frank Baker (perfect name for the man who was cooked from the inside, honestly!) how could he possibly agree to participate in a re-enactment? Sure, the jacket is some flame retardant stuntman’s gag, but what about the adage: once burned, twice shy? As gallant as Frank is, would he really want to re-enact his closest 'brush' with death?

    After some stilted dialog, the 'actor' says what sounds like, 'I was in a chair panic.' This is odd because it looks like he was sitting on the couch. Then he says, he was ‘petrified’!

    No…. stilted and wooden maybe, but petrified is no description of even his lackadaisical beating out of the flames. Man oh man. He goes after those flames like he wants them out by tomorrow!

    He said he had no idea what was taking place in his mind.

    How about, 'Goodness me, but I seem to have burst into flames!' Or a simple :wtf:

    Next, the voice over says -and this is the funniest part of all- 'Eventually, Frank managed to extinguish the flames.'

    Eventually! What, three months later!? Who is he, the WTC? How long did he smolder for? And it is his friend Pete who puts out the fire, not Frank who seems to actually be nodding off with boredom when the flames are ‘eventually’ extinguished.

    Pete puts out the fire! Not Frank! Lies upon lies, I tells ya!

    Then we’re told Friend Peter gets Frank to a doctor, but the medical profession were ‘no help’. And yet, there sits Frank alive and well with no visible scars. Damned doctors!

    Frank concludes by saying that the doctor said he was burnt from the inside out and he had never ever (note that ‘ever’) seen anything like it. Do tell!

    Maybe that’s because the doctor leans toward a sciencey view of the world, I dunno. :shrug:

    So, even if I believed that Frank Burns had spontaneously baked, I wouldn't because this video is so completely lame.
  17. Bells Staff Member

    Mod Note

    I notice the OP has been created across several other forums.

    We already have human combustion threads in the pseudoscience sub-forum on this site. Please post your experiences there.

    This does not belong in Human Science.

    Secondly, you appear to be very familiar. If I find out you are a sockpuppet and I will be checking on this site and all other science forums you have posted your OP in for your true identity, I will be banning you.

    For now, this thread will be closed and moved to the Cesspool.
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