Humour

Discussion in 'Science & Society' started by Benson, Jul 23, 2019.

  1. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    One of the funniest skits ever. Robin Williams on golf.

    (warning crude language) length 3:26 minutes
     
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2020
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  3. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    Trump's new hashtag: #covidfefe
     
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  5. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Ah - you beat me to it.

    I thought of covfefe-19 just today.
     
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  7. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    Knock-knock version:

    "Knock knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "Coro"
    "Coro who?"
    "Coro da virus"
     
  8. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    In times of food shortage.
    "Knock knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "Corpo"
    "Corpo who?"
    "Corpo Ration"
     
  9. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Extended version
    . . .
    "Coro who?"
    "Coro da virus"
    "You mean, coronavirus?"
    "Yeb, dad's ride"
     
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  10. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    Why is Donald Trump like a Playboy centerfold?

    If you want any of what's being promised, you have to deliver it yourself.
     
  11. Benson Registered Senior Member

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    Your quarantine nickname is how you feel right now + the last thing you ate.

    My name is Sick Bat.
     
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  12. Baldeee Valued Senior Member

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    That would make me Relaxed Humous.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

     
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  13. Michael 345 New year. PRESENT is 70 years old Valued Senior Member

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    To restrictive sorry

    Mine

    Shitus Selfus commonly called Oops

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  14. Benson Registered Senior Member

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    A Nigerian e-mailed me to say I won $5,000,000 on the lottery. So I've sent off my $20,000 to release the funds.

    So long suckers.
     
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  15. Michael 345 New year. PRESENT is 70 years old Valued Senior Member

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    Holmes and Watson go on a camping trip

    After setting up a tent and enjoying a meal they retire to sleep

    After awhile Holmes awoke up

    Nudging Watson he asked

    Watson look up at the sky ol' chap and tell me what you see?

    Watson replied - Well I see a clear sky and millions and millions of stars

    What does a clear sky and millions of stars suggest to you?

    A clear sky we will have a fine day tomorrow

    Millions of stars suggest there might be other planets with life

    Star arrangement suggest to some they affect our lives

    The current arrangement could give me an approximate time if I could remember how to do the calculation

    What do you see Holmes

    Well I don't see our tent

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  16. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    An eminent observer of human cultural issues and behaviors;

    (warning, crude language)
     
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  17. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Too many deaths in America.

    Donald Trump: "These doctors testing to see if someone is dead, I think that could be overrated. I think the tests are overrated.
    If we didn't test, fewer people would die."
     
  18. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Given the oft-repeated meme that the Trump presidency is a reality TV show, I thought up some names for his predecessors' efforts at entertaining.

    If we start with Reagan, who was actually a star, although his movies probably never got out of B-grade territory.

    So, Ronald Reagan was like John Wayne in a movie about fool's gold and the quest for redemption by the Republican party. I think I can call it Unforgiveable.

    Then there was George I, and his masterpiece which I like to think of as A Fistful of Oil Shares, in which a man with no brain saves a town from economic despair by destroying it.

    Then at last, Bill came to town; this one was just a simple tale, The Administration, about a man who doesn't have sex, even with his wife. Practically a saint.

    George II was a bit like Gomer Pyle goes to Washington, and, well, we've seen that movie too.

    Then Obama, the fresh-faced kid from faraway Illinois or somewhere; this one was like The Fresh Prince of Pennsylvania Ave; lots of examination of social problems like racism, drug abuse, a few laughs, then the next episode.

    Finally Trump, the president with a brain the size of a goldfish. This one doesn't really have a fixed format because nobody is interested in watching someone watch cable news.
     
    Last edited: May 20, 2020
  19. Beer w/Straw Transcendental Ignorance! Valued Senior Member

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    Think this is more accurate.

     
  20. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Donald Trump is like an old guy in a retirement home, bitching about what's on the TV.
    So the nurse gives him the remote, he switches to another channel and starts bitching about what's on the TV.
     
  21. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    America has Trump enemies, what it needs is a Trump enema.
    Flush that orange turd, dudes.
     
  22. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Trump parts the sea of protestors.

    Trump travels to a holy place and holds aloft the sacred tablets.

    footnote: political satire might sometimes be interpreted as headlines in an evangelical newsrag.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2020
  23. arfa brane call me arf Valued Senior Member

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    6,987
    Spotted on fuzzbook:

    The Oval Office is officially a broken toilet. If it wasn't there wouldn't be an orange turd floating in it.
     

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