Humor in Science

Discussion in 'Biology & Genetics' started by S.A.M., Mar 10, 2008.

  1. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    Every Friday afternoon, a mathematician goes down to the bar, sits in the second-to-last seat, turns to the last seat, which is empty, and asks a girl who isn't there if he can buy her a drink.
    The bartender, who is used to weird university types, always shrugs but keeps quiet. But when Valentine's Day arrives, and the mathematician makes a particularly heart-wrenching plea into empty space, curiosity gets the better of the bartender, and he says, "I apologize for my stupid questions, but surely you know there is NEVER a woman sitting in that last stool. Why do you persist in asking out empty space?"
    The mathematician replies, "Well, according to quantum physics, empty space is never truly empty. Virtual particles come into existence and vanish all the time. You never know when the proper wave function will collapse and a girl might suddenly appear there."
    The bartender raises his eyebrows. "Really? Interesting. But couldn't you just ask one of the girls who comes here every Friday if you could buy HER a drink? Never know --she might say yes."
    The mathematician laughs. "Yeah, right -- how likely is THAT to happen?"
     
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  3. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    An engineer a physicist and a mathematician were at hotel for a conference when during the night three separate fires broke out, one in each of their rooms.

    The engineer grabbed the water jug and and kept pouring until the the fire was dead.

    The physicist calculated how much water would be required, based on the size of the fire and the availability of combustible materials, measured out the necessary amount and doused the fire.

    The mathematician looked around, saw the water jug and noticed that it was full.
    Realising there was a solution to the problem he went back to sleep.
     
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  5. Roman Banned Banned

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  7. Hercules Rockefeller Beatings will continue until morale improves. Moderator

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  8. Hercules Rockefeller Beatings will continue until morale improves. Moderator

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    http://xkcd.com/765/


    (mouse-over text from image)
    Dear editors of Homeopathy Monthly: I have two small corrections for your July issue. One, it's spelled "echinacea", and two, homeopathic medicines are no better than placebos and your entire magazine is a sham.
     
  9. Dywyddyr Penguinaciously duckalicious. Valued Senior Member

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    David Letterman's Top Ten Reasons Why Network News Producers Do Not Give Science More Air time:

    Number Ten: They are unable to locate file footage of the Big Bang.
    Number Nine: They think that high-temperature superconductors are too hot to handle.
    Number Eight: El Niño is covered by the weather department.
    Number Seven: They already did the O.J. DNA story.
    Number Six: They are unable to find information about semiconductors in the music section of the library.
    Number Five: They are afraid of reporting on dark matter because they think it is contagious.
    Number Four: They are waiting for cold fusion.
    Number Three: They think that the greatest scientific achievement is Tang.
    Number Two: They wouldn't know the superconducting supercollider from a hole in the ground.
    And the number one reason why network news producers do not give science more air time: Scientists are from Mars . . . Journalists from Venus.

    http://www.jupiterscientific.org/sciinfo/jokes/miscellaneousjokes.html
     
  10. M00se1989 Banned Banned

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    Its just when you think you know everything that you realize you know nothing.

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  11. JuNie Registered Senior Member

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    fora.tv/2009/11/08/Science_Laughs_The_Comedy_of_Norm_Goldblatt

    You must watch this. It's not bad.^^^
     
  12. JuNie Registered Senior Member

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    fora.tv/2009/11/08/Science_Laughs_Science_Comedian_Brian_Malow

    Another must watch for the science nerds^^^
     
  13. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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  14. 786 Searching for Truth Valued Senior Member

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    This indeed is very funny

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    Some of the pauses are just hilarious.

    Peace be unto you

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    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 24, 2011
  15. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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    My favourite pause is after this

    Biostatistician: 3 patients per group or in total?

    Scientist: Yes

    <pause>
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 24, 2011
  16. Hercules Rockefeller Beatings will continue until morale improves. Moderator

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    I concur – that is hilarious.

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    If I was forced to identify with one of the characters, I have to admit that I would be the non-biostatistician. I just know about biochemical pathways, not all this stats stuff! More than once I’ve designed and performed experiments only for a (bio)statistician to inform me that I cannot draw any statistically significant conclusions from it.

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  17. 786 Searching for Truth Valued Senior Member

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  18. Pete It's not rocket surgery Moderator

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  19. Hercules Rockefeller Beatings will continue until morale improves. Moderator

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    Funny! Just in case anyone missed it: asystole (colloquially known as 'flatline')
     
  20. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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  21. Mandana Registered Senior Member

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    This one is also interesting!

    Well, this pic I liked a lot and thought of sharing with you

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  22. Rav Valued Senior Member

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  23. scheherazade Northern Horse Whisperer Valued Senior Member

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