Difference between a lib, conservative, and southerner

Discussion in 'Politics' started by truth, Mar 19, 2004.

  1. truth Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    643
    LIBERALS CONSERVATIVES AND SOUTHERNERS

    How do you tell the difference between Liberals, Conservatives and
    Southerners?

    Pose the following question:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
    children.
    Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the
    corner,
    locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges.

    You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
    seconds before he reaches you and your family.

    What do you do?

    http://soloshideaway.home.att.net/293/how_do_you_tell.htm
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 19, 2004
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  3. Spyke Registered Senior Member

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    As a southerner I'm highly offended by that generalization. When I slipped that second clip into the gun, being a true southern gentleman, I would have offered the weapon to my lady for her to exact her own satisfaction on the dastardly fiend. A true southern gentleman understands that according to the standards of the 21st century, allowing the southern belle to have an equal part in defending herself would have been the only chivalrous thing to do.

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  5. shrubby pegasus Registered Senior Member

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    another baseless stereotype by truth. way to keep on getting caught up in your own arrogance and self righteous beliefs.
     
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  7. DeeCee Valued Senior Member

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    1,793
    I'm a liberal and I would have disarmed him and cut off his fingers with the knife.
    The Glock I'd keep as insurance.

    There you go, No one dies and no repeat offending!
    Try being a liberal for a while truth
    You get to be mean and feel good about it afterwards!
    Dee Cee
     
  8. truth Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    643
    That was funny!

    Shrubby, please show me where the arrogance was and even a lack of truth. Yes, it is a generalization, nevertheless, it is fact based in its wit. Calm down, I am sure that you will be safe with a focus group to speak with or victim's group afterward, or the ever presence of the police to make sure such things do not occur.

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  9. shrubby pegasus Registered Senior Member

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    you continuously post nonsense like this. you post them in some attempt to show yourself as superior. also if you think there is any fact to what you say, you should really try and understand what liberalism is. while doing so, try to break away from your expert sources of nonbiased media
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2004
  10. truth Registered Senior Member

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    643
    I have not posted any nonsense, shrubby, it is only nonsense to you since I am not a liberal and do not agree with you. Sounds like I already understand what liberalism is. Btw, what exactly do you consider a non-biased news source, although the original post was taken from no news source. Pretty much, liberalism summed up is thus: do what you want as long as it agrees with what the liberals say is okay, that it is someone else's fault, not yours, your problems are the result of someone else, not your own efforts, religion is bad, except for Islam because they scare liberals, gays are good, criminals should not be punished for their crimes, guns kill people but people do not kill people, schools are responsible for teaching morals, liberals are our intellectual superiors because they know what is best, they want high taxes to pay for midnight basketball, welfare is good, making welfare recepients work is bad, if you are a minority then it is all the white man's fault, the French are culturally and morally superior, quiche is an acceptable food, and it is okay to be a coward and hide behind women and children instead of leading from the front. I am sure I missed some things, but you get the picture. As Jerrick says, liberalism is a disease.
     
  11. 15ofthe19 35 year old virgin Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,588
    Liberals are all about free speech until they think it might offend someone, anyone, and then they scream for censorship. Just check out the Open Gov't forum for proof of this.
     
  12. Mystech Adult Supervision Required Registered Senior Member

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    3,938
    That has to be the worst rendition of the theme to The Good, The bad, and The Ugly that I've ever heard. I had to get half way through the liberal answer before I even recognized what it was supposed to be. Why do people insist on keeping bad midis around, let alone flaunt them on their websites?
     
  13. Mystech Adult Supervision Required Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,938
    Wow, I'd say that all of this says a whole lot more about yourself than even a very general description of liberalism.

    You think that the news media is biased against you (likely your own views are so off the wall that you can't help but feel offended even by an impartial reporting of events) you fear other people having strong opinions that don't run parallel to your own, you don’t' believe that one's environment has any impact on their actions, you hate Islam, and take other people's defense of it (Ironically while people like you happen to be attacking it with irrational and baseless claims) as an attack on Christianity, you're homophobic (or at least heterosexist), you don't take well to other's ideas of punishments that fit the crime, or at least dislike the word rehabilitation, you're afraid that politicians are lurking in the shadows waiting to take your deadly weapon away from you (oh wait, and all those other mentally deranged people who could otherwise legally own those wonderfully efficient machines designed specifically to kill human beings), you are convinced that liberal teachers are brainwashing youth (perhaps by teaching about the civil rights movement, or implying that McCarthyism was just a bit reactionary and irrational?) you feel threatened by intellectuals who try to use their educations and reasoning to make it seem as though they should know what they're talking about better than Joe hick in his pickup truck working the corn field, you're against public money going anywhere near black urban youth, feel that the poor are poor because their lazy and should be left to die, white men are the target of harmful racism, but minorities are just being whiny when they cry about the same thing, fear European culture and any suggestion that any non-American could have a good idea, or a culture as valid and worthy of respect as our own, real men don't eat quiche (Ok I've got to go with you on that one), and finally, as a man you're the natural better of the weaker sex.

    That's quite an amalgam of utterly ridiculous ideas right there truth. As I always like to say, conservatives just don't know better.
     
  14. shrubby pegasus Registered Senior Member

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    454
    no one is against free speech here, expect maybe you. you call me speaking my mind an attempt at censorship, isnt that you making some bush type argument to censor me, on par with it is unpatriotic to speak contrary to your beliefs. this forum is about a discussion of ideas, not the perpetuation of right wing bias and stereotypes.
     
  15. shrubby pegasus Registered Senior Member

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    454
    again, you make it obviously apparent that you dont understand the liberal point of you. do you know anything about clinton s presidency? he was a democrat you know.

    oh yeah, it was your man bush who hid behind money and influence in the national guard, while the common man, mostly poor and middle class democrats who were out fighting the wars.

    mystech pretty much summed up the idiocy of your argument, i think ill leave it at that.
     
  16. Mystech Adult Supervision Required Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,938
    Well in all fairness to truth, I'm one of those liberal types myself in many respects. I favor government involvement in the economy, I'm pro gun control, hate Bush, I'm one of those anti-American war protestors (Good lord that practicaly makes me a terrorist!) who feels that Muslims aren't entitled to any more shit than any other religion (which is a fair bit as I hate religion in general), I seek to subvert the American way of life and destroy families and the institution of marriage by allowing gays equal rights, and seek to push the "homosexual agenda" (which is really special rights when you think about it, and also somehow disenfranchizes white males at the same time on some level, I'm certain), I believe that effective rehabilitation is better than vicious punishment, and I don't cringe at the idea of paying taxes for public services. Oh, also I wake up to NPR on my alarmclock radio every morning, so I guess my opinion shouldn't really matter much.
     
  17. SpyMoose Secret double agent deer Registered Senior Member

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    1,641
    You know what is REALLY at the core of this thing 'truth' has posted? The concervative desire to kill a man in self defence. Whoowee the thought of it just makes some peoples cup runeth over. Hey, if somone is going to kill you, sure go ahead and kill them back, but the rest of the time, when we are all minding our own buisness, do you think you could try to not obcess over it? Why is it such a tremendous preocupation with some folks?
     
  18. DeeCee Valued Senior Member

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    1,793
  19. Mystech Adult Supervision Required Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,938
    Man oh man, you haven't lived until you've killed a man in self defence. It's one of life's little pleasures; Makes you feel like a real man!
     
  20. 15ofthe19 35 year old virgin Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,588
    I don't believe I made any reference to you in my post, but you certainly wouldn't be the first completely self-centered poster I have run across on this forum. If you are capable of reading comprehension, you will see that I pointed you to Open Govt as an example.


    .

    I was under the impression that this particular thread was a bit of tongue and cheek humor, a metaphor or allegory, but certainly not serious. It was only after you got your panties wedged up your crack that this thread turned to politics. Might I make a suggestion...

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    Last edited: Mar 21, 2004
  21. shrubby pegasus Registered Senior Member

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    wow 15 of 19 you are like the kettle calling the teapot black. your reading comprehension seems to be lacking abit as well. go back and reread and you will see you are guilty of exactly what you are trying stand above.
     
  22. 15ofthe19 35 year old virgin Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,588
    I am trying to be guilty of keeping this thread on the track it was intended for: Lighthearted humor. Generally speaking, that is something in short supply on Sciforums.
     
  23. jps Valued Senior Member

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    1,872
    No, no, no, you're method is ridiculous. This is how you tell:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
    children.
    Suddenly, a dangerous looking, but harmless homeless person jumps out from the alley in front of you.

    What do you do?

    If you're a liberal:
    You jump back startled, but quickly realize there is no danger, give the homeless person a dollar, and go on feeling good about yourself, secure in the knowledge that the homeless person will use that dollar to better their life.

    If you're a conservative:
    You immediatelly shoot the homeless person in the head, then, upon realizing they were unarmed and no threat, wipe off the gun, and put it in the homeless person's hand, secure in the knowledge that they were of no benefit to society whereas you are, so it makes no sense for you to let yourself be punished for their death, and remind yourself to report that you're gun was stolen two nights ago.

    If you're a southerner:
    You empty your weapons clip into the homeless person, then step over them and go about your business, secure in the knowledge that you've done your state a service whether they were a threat or not, and no one will look into the matter too closely.
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2004

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