Deer Tick in the Anus

A few months ago I went hiking and took a seat on some rocks, next thing I knew there was very miniature wriggling sensation (presumably a tick) crawling into my anus. ( I hate to even say the word!) I was wearing shorts at the time, which would prove even worse off for such a situation.

At first I thought and direly hoped, "maybe its just an itch." But now I'm having an occasional intense pinch-ache (about once every 5 minutes or so) in that area. (A month and a few weeks after it may have entered.)

To be truthful, I'd rather blow my own brains out (and die a virgin) than go to a doctor for removal of such a fowl creature!

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If it WAS a deer tick and you don't go to the doctor, you just MAY die a virgin.

The good news, you would likely have been getting Lyme Disease symptoms after just a few weeks.

 

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You should go to doctor, maybe this creature has permanantly settled in your arsehole and it started to establish a colony in there. I don't know, maybe you can try some other methods yourself, like inserting ten different things. One of them should scare the bastard..

 

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A soldering iron should do the trick.

 

naw - use a curling iron with the attachable rollers

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serioulsy go to the f*cking gp. they deal with ass holes all day long...

 

so you would rather literally die of embarrassment?

 

Diode Man and his crazy threads. Wtf? What's with the bug up yer ass?

Dude youre crazy, It's not a tick, but you'll have to go the ass doc someday so what's the dif? get to know him.

 

This is not true. It can manifest at any time.

 

Dude, check your shit for pinworms.
I don't think ticks crawl up your butt. And even if it did, it would be long done with you by now and crawled out again (or died there).
On second thought, maybe it laid eggs in your butt

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also, in regards to the embarrassment issue...keep in mind that some people stick objects and critters up their asses just for fun, and have to get a doctor to remove them. so, it could be worse.

 

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This thread reminds me of that You Tube video(was supposed to be true) where a man video recorded himself getting it up the anus by a horse.Not one of those minature horses either.A few days later the man died from being torn up inside(internal bleeding) due to the horses penis being to large for his human body.

So PLEASE OP get to a doctor.

 

My daughter had a tick at the nape of her neck that was literally the size of a quarter by the time we discovered it. It was a disgusting, bloated creature. She was put on antibiotics for a week or so just to be safe.

 

Diode-Man a friend of mine had body image problems and a back problem. So he decided to go to a blind back specialist. Maybe try the same? Clearly you would be risking extra fumbling around your arse and possible the insertion of the wrong tools. Also, before you go ask him what perfume his wife wears and avoid that kind of scent for a few days before your appointment.

Many people have problems attending Doc appointment its a known issue and taken very seriously. I'm not sure where you are but there might be some assistance in helping you get the courage to attend the appointment.

 

I'm pretty sure that the simple answer is that "If" you are being serious, go see your doctor.
(You'll probably find out you got Hemorrhoid's, please note there are pictures of what they are through the link, which is revolting.)

If you want some daft suggestion for a cure, get hold of some extra hot chilli sauce and coat your butt end in it. If it's going to irritate you, it's bound to irritate anything attached to you.

Other than that, go see a Doctor. (This thread is now closed as there isn't really anything anyone "should" add.)