im "only" 15 and i hold the door open for the girls at school (except the evil ones) Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! and i beleive in chivalry and honor. of course alot of ppl at school think im slightly mad even my teachers especially when i talk to myself and stare at nothingPlease Register or Log in to view the hidden image! most of the guys at my school are iditots/jerks theyre rude to the girls and are just well..jerks.. anyways heres my question. why do girls smile at you and whisper to themselves? maybe theyre plotting against me but i doubt it. they just act weird.. btw heres the formula proveing some girls are evil..you have to r-click on it and click show picture Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
If only i could read minds... Im a man, i am 25 yrs old, and i live in the twin cities of minnesota...I find it hard to find a "soul" mate or someone i would like to settle down with or even date for that matter. The reason is because i find that most women i meet are superficial...Oh how i dislike that persona. Like for instance i hear women saying quite often: that person is really fat or that jacket looks horrible or that guy is a wierdo...things like that...First off i think people should treat others how they themselves would like to be treated (the golden rule!) even if the target person in question isnt around to witness all this bad stuff. Second: looks, clothes, people that are different from yourself...these things dont matter in the big scheme of life...I'm all about conscious, creative, and intelligent thought...and many people i meet dont show it by their actions. In regards to the idea of A "soul" mate...Can there be only one? Im sort of traditional but i contradict that with other thoughts that come to mind. You date one person at a time, you marry one person and stay with only that person. with this state of affairs it is highly unlikely that you will even be able to find anyone you are willing to date because they are all "taken" ...If i was seeing a women and she was also dating someone else and didnt tell me about it i would be kind of pissed and sad. But should i blame her? hmmmm...Anyways, I have so many other things i would like to add, but i am rambling on far too long...ill do it later...until then nudge nudge wink wink say no more!
Welcome FluXlog, I posted a reply to your thread, but it suddenly dissapeared. it said you'd better take it to te "Dear Abby" thread. And so you have. BUT this forum is not a dating service (or ... eh guys did I miss something major here???Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!) Anyway, hopefully you will enjoy reading and writing posts here. I And I hope you find your soulmate. Merlijn P.S. I don't think I would like the mind-reading stuff. Not because of some sacret mystery, but because of the feeling of complementarity. What are your thoughts about this?
Acerbus. That was easy...if they smile at you and then whisper, they LIKE you!!! Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Acerbus, you really sound like a sweetheart.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Stay that way and you will be doing alright. At your age the (young) women will come and go probably, in the first time...But I am sure you will find a nice woman, only for you, in the end... FluXlog, be very welcome at Sciforums. And you know, sometimes you just know that someone is the right one. And if you've found that feeling of real love to some woman, and she does have the same real feelings of love towards you, you don't have to be afraid she start fooling around with some other man.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Where do you men get that silly idea of women cheating on you? Is it because they themselves don't trust themselves on that particular point? And then again, you meet men/women and fall in love with them from the time you are a teenager. So it can take some time before you find the one and only... Bebelina you are a joy to every man, which one wouldn't love you.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Tell me and I am coming to hit them for you.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Just be good to the opposite sex men and women, treat them like you want to be treated yourself...big chance you find the right one, eventually. Mistakes occur in every humans love life, that is just the way it is. Guess you learn from it, how much pain and hurt it may bring sometimes. Behave yourself towards others, men and women, for they all have feelings, no matter how the outside 'looks' and 'acts'...
so bebelina your saying i should run screaming from em?Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! thanks bansheePlease Register or Log in to view the hidden image! anyways i dont know how to act around girls. they act weird..make you feel like their pokeing at you.. one time i was walking down the hallway, this was last year,going to my next class and this girl ran up beside me and jumped up(im kind of tall) and hugged me..I have no idea why but the problem i have is the first thing i thought of was "danger" or some similar emotion i was about to take actionwhen i realized it was a girl (this all took like half a second) she just jumped down and ran off i was so shocked i didnt even look to see who it was..
You lucky guy... I wished that happened to me more often than it has in the past Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Maybe for some the fear of their spouse cheating is an inner fear that they themselves can't be faithful, but in my case, and i'm sure that there are heaps of other guy's in the same boat as me, the fear comes from past experiences of being cheated on. Also, up until now every girlfriend i've had has said, I've got more guy friends then girlfriends. Now this is all well and good but what made me uncomfortable is how close they'd be with some of their 'friends'. I may have been a little paranoid but If i'm going out with someone then i'd expect that i'm the only one their cuddling up to. Is this wrong?
Hi All, Shrike, your golden rule about treating people the way you would like to be treated is also my golden rule. Sometimes when someone says something really horrible to you, don't you wonder whether they think about what they're saying? I know some people say things in anger that they regret later, but when that happens I know that on some level they believe what has been said. I like a good debate but I hate to verbally 'fight' with someone. I usually walk away and wait until the person can talk about it calmly. I also try to objectively look at my own motives or ideas to see if I'm being unreasonable. Welcome FluXlog, You're not the only one that dislikes the superficial. It's only when you begin to talk to someone that you really know what sort of a person they are and I wish more people would realise that underneath what may not be an ideal exterior, is a beautiful soul. Regarding soul mates, I don't know. I think because we change so much between our teens and middle age, at different times of our lives soul mates are bound to be different. Finding a soul mate is a very special thing and there have been times where I thought I had met mine but later find it wasn't to be. Maybe people should just enjoy the moments that matter and not expect too much of the other person. Heck, I don't know. I would love to be 'in love' again, but that hasn't happened for a long, long time. Welcome Acerbus, Banshee is right, you do sound like a sweetheart. You will still have many times ahead of you when your heart will do a flip-flop at the sight of someone you've fallen for. Speaking from experience, I know that all that whispering and smiling happens on both sides. I know it's frustrating and you start to get paranoid about your own looks, but I think we all go through it. My advice is to just smile back and try to ignore the whispers. Later down the track someone will tell you what they were whispering about and you'll find it really didn't matter at all. And Merlin, you never know. I'm beginning to hear of many romances starting on the web. So if you're in the market you'll be able to find out a lot about the people you're talking to through the forum. Actually I think it's easier to say what's inside you when you're not actually looking at someone. And I agree with you about the mind reading stuff; I think that would open up a can of worms.
Teri2, I know. I was just making a funny remark. I thgought that would be clear. Sorry. Well, who knows, I may even find a soulmate here. I too once lived under the impression I had found mine. (see my first post on the subject). Now I do not miss her much, however I really miss the feeling I had. The feeling of complementarity, I had a strange kind of peace in my "soul" when I was with her. Just like in the Greek philosophy. What I meant by the remark on mind reading, was that I think it is better to complement than to become one. Since you'll be one in a sense, but there is still this ... erm I don't how to describe the feeling. Emotions are hard to capture in words, aren't they?! I hope you all understand.
I refuse to believe in soul mates, I feel it makes too many people crazy in the search for their ideal partner. If a soul mate is someone who shares everything in common that matters to the soul(this is how i'd define a soul mate) then i've found mine so many times I can't count.I've also known people that I would consider my soul mate but they didn't feel the same. Its a frustrating predicament so i've abandoned the concept altogether. Now i'm happy with someone (starting to become the theme to the thread) that will treat me the way they'd expect to be treated.
Also, I've asked 2 questions that so far haven't been answered 1: Is it wrong to be jealous of a girlfriend that has more male than female friends and is affectionate with them.? 2:Has anyone ever found someone that they thought were 'the one'? 2a: If you have (or haven't) how would you know?
My thoughts: 1. If you are in love and in a serious relationship, this relationship should be built on trust. Without 100% trust there can't be a truly happy relationship(Just my oppinion of course, and i am single Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! ). So, yes it is wrong to be jealous if you really trust her according to me. 2. Nope, not yet 2a. The definition of how to know if she is "the one" according to me: I would know. Simple as that. There would be no doubt that she was the one.
Thanks Daydreamer, in response to your answer to 2a I realise that when you've found the one you'd know, what i'm interested to find out is what makes them 'the one' or in other words what are you looking for in the perfect partner.
As to question 2 and 2 a: read my post and You know the answer. That's how I knew. She left me because she was young and was afraid of getting married. As to question 1. I don't think "wrong" is the right word. But it's not optimal for your relationship. Try to find out why you feel so jealous. If she isn't affectionate with you, I would suggest finding out why that is. It may also be "just" the impression she makes. And what you say about soulmates (" I feel it makes too many people crazy in the search for their ideal partner.") may very well be true. But you cannot deny that the entire culture is full of messages that say "Try to find your soulmate, the love of your life and you'll live hapily ever after". the message is everywhere.
Oh and to your answer to 1, I know you have to have trust and I feel I've been really trusting in the past, but you also have to earn trust, if you read my earlier post I explained the situation a bit better, but your probably right anyway.
Oki, i will try again Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! 2a. You will know that you have found the one when: A. All you want to do is be with this girl every single second. Just to sit beside her, hold her hand, or watch her smile. B. You can COMPLETELY trust her. There is NO way she would be false to you, since she feels exactly like you do. C. When you awake one morning and realize that the happiest moment in your life is when you awaken before her to watch her peaceful face, still sleeping, slightly smiling on the pillow beside you. D.You know for a fact that you would love her exactly as much if you were blind or if you both were 99 years old. E.When the slightest whisper from her lips is enough to make you smile. F.If the single most important thing to both of you is to make each other happy. 6 points of theory Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! I just hope i'm right. Would be too bad to realize at 60 that there are no such relationships. But i am certain i will find mine. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
And as for point 1: I too have had relationships where my trust has been severly broken. Sure it tore me apart each time, but still i firmly believe that no relationship is truly happy without 100% trust. So therefore i still go headfirst into every relationship with 100% trust, Sure, i will probably find myself at the edge of sanity with dispair many times yet. But one day i will be in a truly happy relationship, and really: it only take one success to be happy and infinatly many failures to be broken.
Thanks Merlijn and thanks again Daydreamer that what I was after, their also the things I use to gage if its the one. Merlijn, The way you said "The feeling of complementarity, I had a strange kind of peace in my "soul" when I was with her." Why I don't go for the whole soul mate idea is because I felt this before with each person I've been in love with. So I don't believe there is just one person for you.
'Nother ? about women!!! A girl has a boyfriend which doesn't attend the same instution as her and I. She has gone out with this guy for over a year, but we (the girl) are friends. I'm starting to develope an attraction to her. We are good friends, and she likes me (though I belive it is plutonic). This is so confusing I don't have an actually question. I just need some womens' oppinions.
