One of the ways of being an ass is being hypersensitive about getting respect on one's own terms - especially from older folks. We older folks run into that a lot, from the kids. Another is making snap judgments about people's "attitudes" based on brief and easily misunderstood exchanges - especially people whose "attitudes" are likely to be complicated and developed over many years. Another common feature of the more youthful set's dealings with a larger, older world than they are familiar with. The rule of thumb that welcomes the young into the world of adults while preventing these kinds of asshole reactions from torpedoing civil society is: respect your elders. It's not a perfect rule, and there are exceptions, but more often than not - - - -.