21 y/o virgin here

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by stateofmind, Mar 1, 2009.

  1. phlogistician Banned Banned

    Messages:
    10,342
    Blah blah blah. Wasted words. Now, what did you mean when you asked 'what can be done about it'.

    Do you really think someone can be turned bisexual by one single experience in childhood?

    Or are you just now avoiding discussing some of the silly things you have said?
     
  2. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  3. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    949
    You have no idea what you are talking about Phlog. You would do well to PRACTICE being a kind person and a better listener. Had you REALLY cared about the original poster's content, you would have detected their obvious uncertainties. There is no reference to bi-sexual absolutism via what this person is relating. There is just no merit in demeaning genuine good will by pretending to know what's best. No matter how self righteous and judgmental you may be feeling at the time. Why not simply offer what you personally feel would be a genuine helpful suggestion in context of the OP's concerns? If not, what are you REALLY doing within this thread to begin with anyway?
     
  4. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  5. phlogistician Banned Banned

    Messages:
    10,342
    Still you dodge the issues.

    What did you mean when you asked 'what can be done about it'.

    Do you really think someone can be turned bisexual by one single experience in childhood?
     
  6. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  7. stateofmind seeker of lies Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,362
    Guys, I'm not trying to cure my sexuality. I have intimacy problems with ANYONE - male or female. If you want to debate whether homosexuals are nature or nurture, create a thread about it or post in the existing thousands that have come up before.
     
  8. Absane Rocket Surgeon Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    8,989
    How's not jerking off going for you?
     
  9. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    949
    Go back to the part where I stated that you don't know what you are talking about. Since you are not quoting me verbatim, WTF are you talking about?

    C'mon Phlog, you are a million miles off base here.

    Show me where I stated that one event or experience can turn a person into a specific sexual orientation.
     
  10. phlogistician Banned Banned

    Messages:
    10,342
    You said;

    And there must have been a trigger for these fantasies, so ultimately, you are hinging everything on a very small influence.
     
  11. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    949

    Not even close Phlog. I am using that as a reference point with respect to discerning early instinct based pivotal mental process. Purely mechanical. There is no hint of me suggesting that singular events induce sexual orientation. None at all.
     
  12. takandjive Killer Queen Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,361
    A friend of mine was 22 when he lost his virginity. Truthfully, it was the least of his problems. He also went through a period of thinking he was bisexual, but found out he was straight. The good news is, you don't have to slap a title on it. If you meet someone who wants to have safe, sane consensual sex and you want to also, great. If not, also fine.

    I slept with my friend and he lost his virginity this way. It messed up the friendship, but I think we're both glad he's a bit more "in the mainstream now." Here are the answers he wanted to questions you didn't ask:

    1) The sex was okay, passably good, even.

    2) Don't sleep with someone who's seeing someone else. It's just messy.

    3) Be honest about all things if you want to sleep with someone; if you do/don't want to do something, how you feel about things/the person/relationships, just spit it out.

    Hey, if someone has the cahones to ask, I'd tell them to get bent. That's no one's business but you and your partner's. And frankly, I don't think many people think virginity makes someone more sexually desirable. If someone I haven't intended on bedding tells me about their conquests or lack of, I'm pretty turned off.

    My suggestion is go have fun. The best sexual relationships I've had are because I wasn't worrying.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

    Sex is easy to find; good sex is about doing what's right for you and not worrying about being judged.
     
  13. stateofmind seeker of lies Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,362
    Thank you! Great advice!
     
  14. pluto2 Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    768
    I will probably be a lonely and kissless virgin forever and that's definitely not by choice.

    Hell I can't even get a single date let alone a kiss from a girl.

    My prolonged sexlessness is making me depressed and sometimes I even consider suicide as an option.

    What really scares me is that no one will care for me when I'm old.

    People who marry and have children have their spouse or children who care about them when they're sick and infirm in old age and can no longer take care of themselves.

    But I will probably will have no one to care about me when I'm old, sick and can no longer take care of myself.

    I just wish that I will die young so I won't have to endure sexlessness and extreme loneliness into old age.
     
  15. Kittamaru Now nearly 40 pounds lighter. Staff Member

    Messages:
    13,202
    pluto2 - seek help from a therapist. Nobody here can help you with whatever the root of this kind of mindset is... and that mindset is going to drive away most people that might be interested in you.

    Before you can be happy with a spouse/mate/significant other, you should be able to be happy by yourself - otherwise, you are co-dependent, and that will drive people away (or worse, make it incredibly easy for them to abuse you).
     
  16. spidergoat Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    51,799
    Why not?
     
  17. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,795
    Some people are just extremely shy, they might even have a spot of Aspergers. I'm just wondering but does Pluto 2 fell that he has love to offer or is his sole worry that he won't have anyone to look after him when he's old? Is he a person who is constantly 'mothered/mollycoddled?'
     
  18. spidergoat Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    51,799
    Indeed, I have aspergers too, but I never wonder why I can't get a date. Usually it's because I don't ask. Or I don't want to date that person. Other than that, even unattractive people can date other unattractive people. Or an unattractive person only wants to date attractive people. I mean there is someone for everyone, right?
     
  19. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,795
    Yes, there is someone for everyone. You just have to give that someone a chance but I think your motives can't be selfish like, 'I just want someone to fuck regularly and they can look after me in old age'
     
  20. spidergoat Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    51,799
    I would ask Pluto2 how many girls he has asked out this month?
     

Share This Page