What About Bob?

This thread dedicated to all my newfound fans that expressed so much love in the 'The American' thread.

As posted on an online philosophy forum in response to an accusation of overgeneralization about Americans.

If you're offended by this or ‘The American' thread, you are Bob.
If you can only come to conclusions after reading a book, you are Bob.
If you constantly quote others, you are Bob.
If everything you post on this Forum has some personal focus on specific members and no transcending value beyond being witty and vulgar, you are Bob.
If you come here to socialize, you are Bob.
If you come here to get laid or to make friends, you are Bob.
If your alias ends with a ‘z’, you are Bob.
If you insult males that you are secretly attracted to, you are Bob or Bebe.
If you can only act tough and manly at a distance but you shut your large mouth and become a girlish nobody face to face, you are Bob.
If you've never posted anything based on personal observation or anything constructive on this forum….ever, you are Bob.
If your only defense is: “You are generalizing”, you are Bob.
If your only reaction is to use sexual insinuation about me personally and can offer no counter-arguments to my criticism, you are Bob.
If you are now angry or frustrated, you are Bob.
If you are mostly confused and bewildered by my posts, you are Bob.
If you owe more than $1000.00 to your credit card company, you are Bob.
If you’ve been beaten up more than you’ve been laid, you are Bob.
If you pretend to be unaffected or disinterested in this thread and yet can’t help but post a response, you are Bob.
If you act like you are unaffected by my opinions yet always find yourself peaking in and reading my posts anyway, you are Bob.
If you can’t ignore me, you are Bob.
If you secretly fear that you may be Bob, you are Bob.
If your ass is larger than your chair, you are Bob.
If you have the attention span of a mosquito on crack, you are Bob.
If your idea of philosophy is one paragraph put-downs and witty repartee, you are Bob.
If you can find no value in philosophy, you are Bob.
If you believe being an intellectual means sitting around thinking but not acting, you are Bob.
If you use books as decorations, you are Bob.
If sarcasm and irony escapes you, you are Bob.
If your name is Bob, you are certainly Bob.

 

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I think this over-generalizes.

...

I'd like to add that you have quite an uncanny proficiency at shit-spewing.
I offer both my congratulations and my condolences.

 

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Hi .....BOB!
Welcome to your nightmare.
I'm going to show you who you really are and I'm going to expose you for all to see.
But don't be afraid you are amongst your own, you are the many here and there and everywhere.
I do this for my own kind.
A lesson reserved only for them. they'll understand.
You are only my means and nothing else.

 

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You forgot some:

If you like to complain and satirize about the egocentric, consumer-obsessed, sanitized, hypocritical, and self-righteous culture that is 'America' but you never actually do anything but whine about it, you are Bob.

If you think that you are 'different' from others and that this somehow makes you better than them, you are Bob.

If you think that you're communicating new and original ideas when you're really spouting the same old crap every teen and young adult has throughout history, you are Bob.

If you think that you are a rebel, poet, starving artist, philosopher, or a musician but you have never actually published anything or been paid for a performance, you are Bob.

~Raithere

 

To Bob

While my promotion campaign is doing well in the 'The American' thread-they've even posted a picture of me now to get all the ladies wet and wanting. There’s nothing like a pretty face connected to a beautiful mind for the ladies- I'm still a little disappointed with this one.
Watch this twit use my style in the 'I know I am but so are you' strategy that I’ve grown accustomed to.
He doesn't actually address the topic but only accuses me of being just as guilty of my conclusions.
Let us assume he/she/it is right, what has he proven....only that he's Bob for sure and that he/she/it admits it.
He got upset but he couldn't help itself, it had to post a reply, even if it would expose its quality to everyone, and that said nothing but focused on the writer not what was written.
Twits like to attack people not ideas they prefer personal attacks to substantive ones.
Now I’ve made some critical remarks about western man, as he is represented by the American. The American isn’t a national identity but in a world where US “culture” is being exported and growing in popularity, this type of man can be found everywhere on earth.
Raithere, raithere assumes I do nothing yet isn't this post doing something?
This version of Bob has missed the fact that
I HAVE PUBLISHED SOMETHING RETARD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Go buy it, it's on Amazon. It’s called ‘The Wandering thoughts of a Restless mind’. Open your fucking sow eyes.
I need the money to escape you and your kind. Support my escape from your tedious stupidity drive by buying my book.
If you go back to ‘The American’ thread you will notice the local bugs promoting me and my work without even realizing it.
Look how they worship me and serve me even though they act like adversaries.
Look how they try to bait me into paying attention to them with personal insults and childish remarks.
Look how their pathetic insults hide a degree of admiration and respect
Look how they spread my ideas and make my book and my countenance known.
Look at how, no matter what they say, they can’t stop themselves from reading my every post and my every essay.
Look how they pay homage to me.

Fascinating.

A message for my kind.
I understand that these threads have deteriorated into playground games and childishness but you can’t have a serious conversation on the quality of life in the west and the state of the human condition in general with individuals that lack the necessary intellectual and spiritual tools and qualities.
Inevitably they feel insulted and the reflection of them I place before them is so unflattering and undeniable that they resort to the only weapons left for the weak: vengeance, vulgarity and violence.
In these cases I either must ignore them or use them for my own needs, whether they are self-promotion, egotism or entertainment.
The fact that this is an unrestricted Forum and anyone, no matter his/her quality, can participate makes it necessary to filter though the garbage in order to find some valuable things.
Ignoring most of them is essential and I would urge you to participate by placing most of them on your ‘ignore list’ so that some serious conversation can take place.

 

To sow eyes

Why don't you check who posted a link to the amazon web-page first, before you open your yap?
Why don't you check who posted a picture of me first, before you start mouthing off?
Why don't you check who mentioned first that I had even written a book at all, before you open that sow trap of yours?
I'm prostituting nothing, my minions are doing it for me idiot.
Look how they've made me well known on this forum.
I've had over 100 hits on my web-page justin the last 2 days.
They don't even know they're doing it.
You started by insulting me on every opportunity, to make me notice that you lived, then in your latest post you compare yourself to me as being "just like me".
You, retarded cow, are nothing like me- that's the worst insult I've heard yet-and fantasizing about fucking me is the only thing left for you.
Show us your face Bells if you have the courage.
Show us your work.
Show us anything besides boring posts about nothing and mindless gossip about this guy or that guy.
The only thing I'm proud of is who and what I am.
The book was published for fun and personal amusement.
I don't expect to get rich, bitch, I'm being sarcastic.
I could care less if you or your band of insects buzzing around here buys anythingor even reads me or what you think of me.
My posts speak for themselves and my opinions can be found in my essays.
My personal life and how I live and what I want and who I really am is my business and only a source of speculation.
Are you obsessed with me dear?
Get over it.
I bet you're over 200 lbs and I despise fat; both mental and physical fat.
If you could only see me little girl up closeand personal, you'ld get your panties in a bunch.

 

Quit flirting with him Bells, I mean it.

Hear the yapping of the Bells
Platitudinous Bells!
With uninspired clanging her fusty melody knells
Oh she does tinkle, tinkle, tinkle,
In the stale air of fori
While her posts do oversprinkle
All the forums, seem to twinkle
Promising glories of her mental might;
She disappoints time after time, time, time
Keeping to an antiquated rhyme,
For the tintinnabulation that so musically wells
From Bells, Bells, Bells, Bells,
Bores, bores, bores
Wearisome jingling and the tinkling of the bells.

 

Too funny.

I never denied that I was Bob. If we must accept all your superficial observations and conditions as to who is Bob then most people fit your 'profile' in one way or another. Thusly, I am Bob. Of course the reality of the situation is that while some of these things apply to me others do not and this is probably true of most people in our culture. Your 'argument', such as it is, is just kind of funny and only lightly offensive if taken seriously. Fortunately for me, I do not take it seriously. What I find humorous is that you seem to think that somehow you are 'above' it all. You seem to think that your opinion and point of view is special and original when it is actually rather commonplace.

Rather than try to challenge the absurdity you present I thought I'd just join in and see if you were willing to turn that critical eye inward. I made a few guesses about you based upon my experience of western culture and, judging by your reaction, I apparently hit the close to the mark. Not too bad after reading only 2 posts from you, if I do say so myself. This means that you are Bob and that is absolutely the last thing you'd ever admit; so much for self-honesty.

That's funny. I don't recall attacking you, Bob. My post was addressed generally. You're the one that is attempting to make it personal.

Indeed, these posts and the e-book you "published" serve as your personal soapbox. Tell me, when can we expect your book to come out in print? Maybe I'll buy it and put it up on my book-shelf or leave it lying out on the coffee table as a decoration. I hope it has lots of pretty pictures.

~Raithere

 

damn raith
that was wild. i am not worthy!

 

-Der Raithere

I know not, what is the reason
He is so possessed
His ideas are old many a season
And yet he does not rest

Stagnent is the air in the forum
And slowly flows the time
This thread yet glows with the highlight
Of the Raithere's last whine

The stodgiest of stogies reposing
So enscounced up there
His lack of wit disclosing
He's preening with pompous flair

He shows it thus in every post
And meanwhile sings a song
With melody preposterously bold
Yet as a soporific, strong

The reader, in his small craft
Cannot such cloying take
Sees he not, the rocks fore and aft;
For the reader cannot wake

I fear, that the waves shall be flinging
Both boat and reader to their end;
That must have been what with his singing
Der Raithere did intend

 

xev
do not forget the pretty pictures. employ visual aids. it makes your posts much more incisive

 

That was good, Xev. Thanks!

Love and kisses,
~Raithere

 

That's how a case is made online. You have to cite material other than yourself.

How about V?

Is this your id talking?

Completely unlike you in every respect.

Since you're obviously a renowned entomologist, why don't you explain the difference, to me, between a mosquito's normal attention span, and then a mosquito's attention span on crack. I'm willing to bet every penny I'm supposed to use for college that there is a noticeable difference here.

Raithere, that was awesome. I watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail yesterday. I just figured out that your avatar came from that.

Not only politically correct, but a calm and collected statement. Strictly speaking, e-books don't really count, chief. Plus it looks like only two people have read your "book."

Perfectly unlike yourself, of course. I'm sure you have the intellectual background that allows you to tell what the "necessary intellectual and spiritual tools and qualities" are in a person, or even a mosquito. Or, maybe, a mosquito on crack, because there is a huge difference there.

How many exlcamation points is that exactly?

Incredible. Microsoft'll be begging you for your webpage by practically tomorrow.

An Entomologist?

I think I'll be naming my firstborn Raithere.

 

greek styler! --bzzzzzzzzz

While my promotion campaign is doing well in the 'The American' thread

i know my fellow sciforumers. cheap and penniless losers. they will not spend a dime.

-they've even posted a picture of me now to get all the ladies wet and wanting.

ladies? your audience is primarily male faggot. you also mistake my intent. i parade your mug here in order to give lie to your social pretensions. your face reflects your origins..... the dregs of society.

lemme illustrate this in bit more detail... a pic of granpy/granmy. they look practically neanderthal. understand this, if you peasants refuse to stay in your place, there will be an eventual backlash. pseudo intellectuality is not a passport to the aristocracy. amazon is full of the pretentious little wannabees peddaling incomprehensible tracts. yup, just like you little man

http://hometown.aol.ca/c66c/images/grandfather - grandmother.jpg

He doesn't actually address the topic but only accuses me of being just as guilty of my conclusions.

i claim you project your issues onto others

Let us assume he/she/it is right, what has he proven....

holy cow! you admit you are bob. lets recap....i accuse you of bob's characteristics and you then go on to admit i am right

only that he's Bob for sure and that he/she/it admits it.

wrong. noncommittal does not default towards either acceptance or denial

Twits like to attack people not ideas they prefer personal attacks to substantive ones.

ahh like this ja...

Go buy it, it's on Amazon.

nope. i will however find a copy and put it on kazaa/gnutella/opennap. i am not kidding

I need the money to escape you and your kind. Support my escape from your tedious stupidity drive by buying my book.

heh, escape to what? the non mildewed apartment down the hall? the one without rats?

Look how they pay homage to me.
Fascinating.

indeed. your pathology is a sight to behold. the delusion of grandeur and megalomania are of a very advanced stage. your only hope is a lobotomy

A message for my kind.

yezz fearlezz leeder. vee avait ze signal to deztroy ze puny humanoids

Ignoring most of them is essential and I would urge you to participate by placing most of them on your ‘ignore list’ so that some serious conversation can take place.

too late, fag. your existence here being debated

 

Last edited by WANDERER : Today at 05:09 AM. Reason: The swarm gathers even here. When bugs apear then a carcass is around. Time to move on.

the carcass is yours and everybody sniffs blood
there is no escape in here, little man

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Be vewy, vewy quiet. I'm hunting wabbit.

(edit: Oh why the hell not, I'm having fun.)

Ahh. Now that is a social commentary worthy of attention. Life of Brian is even better.

The self-righteous make easy targets. Of course, that includes me but I'm at least willing to admit it. Nor am I ruffled when it's pointed out.

The thing is you're not presenting a 'serious conversation on the quality of life in the west', you're just ranting about it. Heck, I agree with you; America, Americans, and American culture is pretty fucked up... so is the rest of the world. But pointing out that our consumer and 'special interest' driven culture is self-serving and hypocritical is hardly original. You also neglect to provide any serious analysis of the situation or offer any solutions; you're just bitching. There's nothing really wrong with that but it surely doesn't resolve anything.

But that's not your intent, is it? As you've said you need us to "Support my escape from your tedious stupidity drive by buying my book." which makes this a nice little PR campaign for you and little else. Nothing sells like pandering to the ego and self-esteem of some at the expense of others. So here's to your participation in the unrelenting consumerism that drives cultural mediocrity and demand for self-satisfaction. What I wonder is where you plan on escaping to. I'd buy you a ticket to Mars myself if I could afford it.

~Raithere

 

Bells:
Thesaurus...nae. Have you no familiarity with Poe?
Ye art flirting with the man. What else are those catty little asides about his sexuality? Why the desperate attempts for his attention?
I am not staking a claim, just noting how absolutely annoying you are. At least flirt properly.
Jeez, I can just see you trying to pick up real men in real life.
"Hi Bells, I'm David. What are you reading?"
"EWW! YOU'RE GAY! I HATE YOU!"
Sexual frustration would account for much of your...instability.
Now go play in the sandbox like a good girl.

Raithere:
You're amusing in two ways.

One is that when challenged, you roll over like a little bitch and squeal that you really do agree, American culture is fucked up, the other person is smart - but! But the other person is just complaining, they are not productive.
So in spite of your agreeing with their ideas, you complain that their personality is...lacking.
Never outgrew highschool, did you?

The second is that you cannot sustain an argument unless in a group.