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Thread: Did you know jesus was breast feed?

  1. #1
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    Did you know jesus was breast feed?

    "blessed is the womb that bare thee and the paps which thou hast sucked. But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God and keep it." (Lk 11:27,28)

    I didn't know this. Do you think he also had nappy rash?

    I know Jesus didn't take on his role until later in life so was he born perfect? Any ideas on Mary's cup size?

  2. #2
    Uh ... so what?

  3. #3
    uniquely dreadful S.A.M.'s Avatar
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    Weird, how do you go from breast feeding to cup size? Did your mother breast feed you? What was her cup size?

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by alexb123 View Post
    "
    ? Any ideas on Mary's cup size?
    I'd guess at least a DD - I can't see a supreme being knocking up a chick who didn't have a great rack, can you?

  5. #5
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by S.A.M. View Post
    Weird, how do you go from breast feeding to cup size? Did your mother breast feed you? What was her cup size?

    They both involve Mary's tits.

    I think I was breast feed and I don't know my mums cup size. Do you have any spare milk?

  6. #6
    uniquely dreadful S.A.M.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alexb123 View Post
    They both involve Mary's tits.

    I think I was breast feed and I don't know my mums cup size. Do you have any spare milk?
    And you're interested in a 2000 plus year old womans tits? Geriatric love?

  7. #7
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    I'm interested in EVERYTHING especially things I have not considered before. Therefore, when I think of Jesus getting his lunch from mary's love melons I wanted to know all about them. Would they have been bra'ed up? Can you imagine if she wasn't and being pregnant and on a donkey? Wow, shame most nativity plays only involve pre-pubescents

  8. #8
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    Did you say you has enough for a cup of tea?

  9. #9
    uniquely dreadful S.A.M.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alexb123 View Post
    I'm interested in EVERYTHING especially things I have not considered before. Therefore, when I think of Jesus getting his lunch from mary's love melons I wanted to know all about them. Would they have been bra'ed up? Can you imagine if she wasn't and being pregnant and on a donkey? Wow, shame most nativity plays only involve pre-pubescents
    Considering she was about 12 when she gave birth, it seems to me, fantasising about her tits would probably be illegal in this day and age.

  10. #10
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    Hi Alex,

    I don't know about nappy rash, but I hear he developed lactose intolerance in later life, so it wasn't all good you know.

  11. #11
    God couldn't splurge on formula? cheap bastard.

  12. #12
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by S.A.M. View Post
    Considering she was about 12 when she gave birth, it seems to me, fantasising about her tits would probably be illegal in this day and age.
    12? Wow, so God was a pedo!

  13. #13
    uniquely dreadful S.A.M.'s Avatar
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    12 is pretty late compared to other animals I think.

  14. #14
    The Amish web page is fast! alexb123's Avatar
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    Wow, an animal in bed at 12 and people say things are bad these days.

  15. #15
    Plutarch (Mickey's Dog)
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    Alexb123:

    12? Wow, so God was a pedo!
    Epebophile, not pedophile.

    Pedophilia referes to pre-adolescents.

    A woman who can become pregnant is an adolescent.

    It's the time for marrying and mating for most human beings throughout history.

  16. #16
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    12's a bit early for probability at the time, isn't it ? Modern diets have shifted matters. 14 is more likely, especially since her first pregnancy carried to term and went OK ?

    Being the oldest of eight, all breast fed, may be responsible for my lack of especial fascination with breasts, but it's not just that that makes the bizarre reactions to breastfeeding so common in the US so strange.

    It's kind of ordinary, guys. It's how life is supposed to work. Formula sucks - even the diapers smell worse, and the kids are crabby and sick all the time.

  17. #17
    Ignorance killed the cat
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    "Q. How old was Mary when Jesus was born?

    The Bible doesn’t tell us how old Mary was when Jesus was born. However, based
    on historical and cultural study, we know that a Jewish girl could get married quite
    young; and so Mary may have been between 14 and 17 years old when she gave
    birth to Jesus."

    source: http://www.answersingenesis.org/asse...istmasQuiz.pdf

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