People Skills- Do we need them?

http://www.aberdeennews.com/mld/aberdeennews/news/local/16326214.htm

So do we need people skills?

If yes, can they be taught? How?

If no, why not?

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

Yeah, we need people skills. They can be taught. However, a major concern is that not all people have the same values. How can everybody win when everybody has a different set of values?

People skills are kind of like children-rearing. You don't really need to go out and read a book to learn them or get by. But reading books and seriously studying these things certainly can't hurt.

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

People skills should not be taught. If you are good with people, you should keep it to yourself, it's your advantage. If you want to share it, share it with a close friend.

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

Those are the idle dreams/fantasies of someone who has never had to deal with large groups of people. It's virtually impossible to get, say, ten people to even agree on what to order on their pizzas much less something that might involve their entire lives.

It is by no accident that in almost all human endeavors involving groups of people, there must be an overall authority to make the difficult decisions.

Francois: "However, a major concern is that not all people have the same values. How can everybody win when everybody has a different set of values?"

Exactly! And it's only people who can't or don't recognize that fact who write such idealistic dreams as the man who wrote that posted article. Just by reading it, I can tell that he's never been in a position of authority over a group of individuals ....and yet he writes to tell others how to do it?!

Baron Max

 

An interesting viewpoint. At first, I laughed ....but then I reconsidered.

Just think of it for a moment; What if everyone had the same/similar "people skills" and they were all in the same meeting/negotiation? It would be each individual trying to outdo the others in much the same way as happens now ...mostly chaos and anger, with the final verdict by the one with the most power.

Baron Max

 

Yeah it would be weird if everyone had good people skills, then us with them lose our advantage. Sometimes I wear sunglasses so I get more knowledge out of a conversation than the person I'm talking to does.

Ha I sound a little psycho but it's not that extreme.

Anyway, I always thought critical thinking skills were the fundamental, and people skills grew out of those.

But yeah, they're very important

 

Baron:

We're not talking about a change in values, but an ability to perceive the merits of a difference in point of view.

Do you think it is impossible to train people so that they are able to get along better?

 

Perceiving the differences, and working to form some agreement between two diametrically opposing value systems is two very different things, Sam.

In reality, for the most part, I think people "generally" understand some of the merits of other value systems. But then most don't agree with those value systems.

It's not so difficult, for example, to understand the Chinese guy making and selling the movies with hot, young chicks killing the kittens ....but, Sam, understanding that is not the same thing as accepting it or approving of it. I understand him making the movies ...because they sell and make him money. But that sure don't mean that I approve of it; nor do I think he and I could possibly come to an understanding about it. See?

No, not really. I think we might be able to strip people of their emotions, thus they might be more apt to get along better. But with human emotions in tact, the first time some black guy cuts them off in traffic, they're emotions kick in and they yell, "You Black motherfucker!!" ...and any other time, they'd say that they weren't racist against blacks.

See? It's emotions that are the main problem, not the rational thinking or the rational understanding. I think Star Trek hit it pretty good when the invented Spock and Vulcans ...all logic and no emotions. In that way, it's easy to see how people could get along peacefully (even if they might disagree).

Baron Max

 

deleted

 

NO subject should be studies more than people. People are the beginning of all sciences and mathematics, and it is by people only can science and mathematics be ended.

If you cannot socialize nor comprehend the mind of others, then mathematics and sciences are useless to you.

 

Hmmm... Wrong on every point. Interesting.

 

I have found this. I will relate it to an engineering design review.

Age and experience play a large role in the "get-alongness" factor. Younger, more insecure (or older but less competent) engineers will tend to want to "dominate" and establish themselves better by being the center of attention and offering the "brilliant" ideas. One might think that this would be disruptive to an effective design review. Suprisingly, it's not. The highly experienced and competent members of the team will often sit back and allow the other team members to "battle it out", egos and all, and sort of moderate. The benefits are that often the moderating team leaders will see nuggets of gold in the battle. And it allows the younger members to show off.

My point is that by getting along too well, you can stifle the creativity of competitive moderated conflict.

Does this have anything to do with the topic? How the F would I know?

 

And I'm wrong because......

 

Go back and read your post again ....think about it some. Then I'm sure you'll see why he said you're wrong.

Baron Max

 

Let me help:

SIR ISAAC NEWTON.

'k?

 

Some peoples kids, huh Baron?

 

I got thinking about the idea of people being taught social skills on a broad basis. I cant see it happening because i believe it would soon become apparent that children were in fact being taught to be little manipulators.
Just how skilled/manipulative do you really want the average person to be?

 

I always used the fact that I have more people skills then my peers to my advantage. But yes, it should probably be taught.

 

I define learning as the interaction between self and environment. No matter its richness, the mind cannot be complete without the external environment.

Isaac Newton is touted as an example of a person who's mind was his environment. He had many, many flaws that crippled him socially and was not helped any further by his own self-isolation. Although we are thankful for his contributions to humanity (which is debateable as the work of Liebnitz), one cannot help but wonder what his life might have been like had he gotten out more. Granted this was the 17th century and there wasn't much to do. But for his times, he was backward in many ways. Could humanity have lost out if Isaac Newton had a girlfriend or two? Maybe spent his friday nights with the boys drinking whiskey? Or should we care at all?

 

Absolutely. Interacting with people is pretty much all of life, and we should do it well. It can be taught, but I'm not sure it would be well taught in schools.