Christians - Your Testimonies Please

Discussion in 'Religion Archives' started by c20H25N3o, May 20, 2004.

  1. c20H25N3o Shiny Heart of a Shiny Child Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,017
    Heres mine ..

    When I was 18 I earnt very good money but I had no sense whatsoever. I had also started getting into class A drugs and could easily afford to buy whatever I wanted. As time went on I went down the path of many abusers and got thoroughly depressed, anxious, paranoid, extreme highs, extreme lows etc. I had to quit my job and get help. Psychiatrists did my head in as they all seemed intellectually inferior to me.
    My parents were beside themselves. They knew I was smoking herb and accepted that but they didnt know about the acid, E's etc. My behaviour was very strange most of the time but it was the crippling depression that upset my parents most.

    Now me mum worked with a woman who belonged to a Christian Worship Group and this woman had become a bit of a shoulder to cry on. This woman suggested that two of the male members who had gone through drug problems and associated depression, came to visit me in my home. Well you can imagine how I felt about that!!!! I was like ' Well thats just what I fucking need isnt it. A bunch of God Botherers telling me I need Jesus etc. Fucking A-Holes!!!'
    My mum said they were due to turn up anytime and would I at least be polite. I agreed. I had been brought up not to cause your parents shame and so I went along with it.
    So these two lads turn up, well not really lads - in their 30's. They introduced themselves and asked questions about me.... 'What was going on?', 'Was I paranoid? etc'.
    I answered honestly for the most part I think. Then one of them started telling me about his life. Major mushroom head, travelled to Afghanistan, India etc in a bus just getting wired and living it up - I could tell he wasnt bullshitting either. The other lad was a major alcholic and talked about his miserable wretched little life on the booze.
    They both claimed that 'Jesus' had pulled them back from the brink and 'walked' with them daily helping them in their lives. In my mind I'm thinking 'OK lads you had credibility up till that point ... now why dont you fuck off and leave me to my spliff and techno tunes!'
    Then one says 'Hey theres a meeting on tonight. Why dont you come?? We will take you and bring you back!'
    The penny dropped! Arggg they had come to fucking convert me!

    I was already to make an excuse about why I couldnt go right there and then when I actually looked into this blokes eyes for the first time. How many people look you in the eye when they are talking to you? Check it out, not many do look you str8 in the eye!' Anyway .. I was a bit taken aback because the guy was genuine. He wasnt bullshitting me. Trust me I am very discerning and if this guy didnt look like he was being str8 up with me, I coulda pulled an excuse outta nowhere in a hot flash.
    So I went. The car journey to the 'meeting place' was boring but it actually made a change from staring at my bedroom walls, just broke up the day. This was how I justified going along with this madness anyway.
    We got there ... big church hall, lots of old people outside. A few young uns, looked a bit like geeks to me. My heart sank. This was gonna be two hours of fucking dull dull dullo with god botherin weirdos - oh joy!
    I smiled politely (musnt cause the parents shame) and said hello to people as they said hello to me. We shuffled into this hall and to my horror there were rows of chairs all very regimental. People made their way to a chair, sat down and stared at the stage. Some musicians came on ( well at least I could mock the guitarist who was bound to be crap ) and people scrambled to their feet and they started playing some 'jesus yeah!' tune. Everyone was clapping and singing and I felt a bit like a jew at a pig roast to be honest.
    I started praying it would be over in a cynical way.
    Eventually it did end after some 'speakers' had rabbited on about something I was probably oblivious to in my mind-numbed state and more of those good old 'jesus yeah!' tunes had been sung ...
    The two guys who had brought me to the place greeted me afterwards and asked me what I thought.

    Me Politely ( of course ): 'Yeah it was OK. People seemed to enjoy themselves.'
    Them: 'But did you enjoy it?'
    Me: 'Yeah it was OK.'
    Them: 'Shall we get a coffee?' <pointing to v long queue for coffee>
    Me:
    <Mind thought='are you fucking kidding?????' />
    [Gob]Yeah that would be great![/Gob]

    So we stand in this queue. The coffee is being poured by two very old ladies in only a way that snails could follow with any kind of precision.

    It is painful standing there. Awkward. Sensing my awkwardness, one of them says 'I really feel that Jesus wants us to pray with you!'. The other guy chips in 'Yeah its sooo strong isnt it. I really feel it too.'
    I'm starting to feel like a trapped animal and have to keep reminding myself that this will end, has to end. I will be back in my bedroom smoking a fatty and listening to tunes and this will be over.
    I look at them , feverishly searching for signs of fanaticism and a little crazyness in their eyes but I see none of this. They just look like two excited boys who have just been asked to help Dad hold some wood he is about to cut. I couldnt say no! I looked at the coffee queue, it hadnt moved. I figured if I indulged in their mission to pray with me, perhaps they would be satisfied and take me home. What did I have to lose ( apart from any street cred I had ever obtained) ?
    I said 'OK' and shrugged. In my mind I was convinced they were gonna say 'Dear Father, please save this wretched soul from drug addiction etc etc'. Oh fuck it I could live with that as long as I get home soon cos I was feeling pretty paranoid and a little out of my depth now.
    They led me over to a quiet corner where people had finished stacking chairs up and flanked me to the left and right. One said ' Jesus is a gentleman, he doesnt just barge into your life and force himself upon you. Rather he wants you to hear his knocking and when you hear it he wants you to invite him into your life.'
    [My Mind]Oh for fucks sake ... anything else before I can go!!!![/My Mind]
    I stood there while they shut their eyes and put their outstretched palms near me but not touching me. I was expecting the 'Dear Father ...' monologue and just braced myself hoping that when they had finished I could pull off a polite 'Oh I do feel a bit better thanks. Mmm something to think about.' speech. Humour them, get shot of them, job done!
    There was no Dear Fathers, In fact I only caught a few words of English like 'Thank you Lord, Praise you Lord', the rest of their 'words' were not in any tongue I had ever heard. It was a little weird but when you had taken as many trips as I had in my time, very little phases you out completely. They didnt stop. No chance to pull out the 'I'm better now, you can feel like youve done a good job lads' speech.

    To be continued ...
     
  2. Google AdSense Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  3. c20H25N3o Shiny Heart of a Shiny Child Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,017
    I found myself standing their completely alone. 'Alone' is probably a bit melodramatic. I knew people were there of course but I had kind of shut them out. I had pretty much shut everything out including the two blokes 'praying' with me. I looked up at the roof / sky and mused how strange it was that I was 'actually' 'messed up' and yet all the things I had seen that evening were just as equally messed up and it was all a question of perception. As I looked skyward I said in my mind to 'Jesus' ... 'Come on then if you are there. Here I am .. I dont believe in all this but I reckon if your as great as everyone makes out you will show me that you are not just a bunch of myths and rubbish.'
    If you read the following and think I am making it up I wouldnt blame you. If I were you I would think 'Yeah interesting anecdote .. next...', however the following is my own testimony of what happened.
    Something fell on me. Not really fell on me but more like floated down. Not a solid object of any kind but more like a very soft warm invisible cloak. As this cloak settled on and through me I felt the most incredible peace. I got a bit scared and tried to fight it. A little like if you have ever tried to fight the anaesthetic before an operation. I fell backwards. At this point no one had touched me. The two guys either side of me ceased to exist for all intents and purposes except I could still hear them softly. Falling caused no fear in me at all. The thing I was enveloped in was the very essence of trust and 'love' and there was no way that any darkness or fear in me could hide from it. It was exposed and literally 'fled' from me.
    The two guys had caught me and had laid me down gently on the floor still praying while they did. My eyes were open whilst this happened. I was not unconscious although the sheer depth of understanding I was receiving from this 'power' was extreme and the world before my eyes seemed very distant but only because it was 'mortal' and 'finite'. This invisible cloak that had wrapped itself around me caused me to feel very strongly that I was being cleansed by blood. Not blood as I guess most would understand it but a river of blood that washed away the badness that had allowed the darkness to get a foothold. I understood how precious that blood was as it surged through me, how costly it was. Understand I am not religous. My parents didnt take me to church and I had no understanding of Christian theology or anything more than this bloke Jesus died on a Cross and he had just told people to love God. That was his crime. I kind of thought that the drama of Christ was a bit like an anecdote - like the 'love thy neighbour' stuff.
    If you are even a little bit messed in the head at the moment you will know what I mean when I say that it feels 'grim'. It kind of hangs around you that 'messed' feeling almost haunting at times. All of that disappeared and I felt like I could 'see' again for the first time.
    I felt soooo clean. Right through my inner being, the very core of me had been cleansed.
    Even as I write this and recollect the day, the hour, the moment, I realise it must sound very fantastical. I looked up at the two guys who were still praying over me. They were at peace and thanking God for his greatness. All sincerity. I was shaken to my roots and yet so overjoyed to be back to my old self. The depression had been lifted. The impatience, the cynicism all gone. I smiled at the blokes and said thanks to them. I was bursting with questions to ask them but all I could blurt out was [sic] 'Iiiiii've bbbbbeen washed in blood'. They seemed to understand perfectly what I was saying like it was nothing out of the ordinary and they told me ' I was very blessed' and the Lord had told them that He had revealed His nature to me.
    After that I read loads of the bible and delved into theology and sought out that 'nature'. The books dissapeared after a while. But seeking out that divine nature, such a powerful life giving thing has never left me. I see it everywhere. I see it knocking on doors all the time.
    I dont go to church. I dont preach to people. I think Easter is a commercial hype as I do Christmas. I swear, I laugh, I grow cannabis. I get upset and I bleed. I've been through terrible times since that day and I have had great times too. I've done some excellent things and I've made dumb mistakes. I have no regrets. That invisible cloak stays with me in subtle ways and not so subtle ways. It is a mysterious thing. It is refered to in the Bible as the Holy Spirit and was said to be the gift given to believers. Pentecost - appearing as flames over the heads of those being baptised. It is also refered to as the 'Helper'. I can testify that I am helped in soooooo many ways.
    Like I say, this is my personal testimony. It is true as I am alive. For me God is real. He is also quiet spirited and humble. A deep peace.
     
  4. Google AdSense Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  5. Paula Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    196
    I can tell you I have had some similar experiences, though not quite so fantastic, which led me to becoming a Christian. I do go to Church, but I look at it as more of a support system than a duty. I pray, but not in a prescribed format, mostly long conversations with God. My allegiance is not to a particular church, although I am a practising Catholic, but to the teachings of the New Testament. I don't bother with conversations about proving God or God's existence or anything like that because I think it is a conversation that will ultimately satisfy no one and bears little relevance to my own private faith.

    I agree that God's love is quiet and peaceful, but it is available. We also have to make ourselves available to receive it.
     
  6. Google AdSense Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  7. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    C20,

    Pretty typical Christian anecdote. Nice exaggeration of how bad you were and then the required exaggeration of a miraculous conversion, which is the usual style of such sickening testimonies.

    The more likely truth is that they did a good relentless selling job on you on their home turf, and you were already so confused that you simply gave up and buckled under their pressure. And then of course once you had shown signs of weakness then you would have lost face to back out and had to go all the way – now of course you are simply living under a delusion that something is protecting you.

    A good con and you’ve been well and truly conned, and mainly by your own actions.

    Kat
     
  8. Paula Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    196
    Katazia,

    This thread was aimed at Christians. Bye now.
     
  9. Q25 Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    593
    Im not Christian,so cant offer you any religious experiences,
    however Ive never needed any,since I get high on life.
    born and raised atheist I get high on
    things such as work,exercise,physical fitness,s&m,traveling,driving fast cars,and good food.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!



    used to get drunk and party hardy when I was young and stupid,mostly b/c all my friends did also.

    tried weed once and hated it, feel best when straight and sober.

    and since I learned very early that when you need a helping hand you will find one at the end of your arm,have never cared nor needed for some imaginary skyfairy and all the related crap Jesus loves you etc.

    if it works for yous though go 4 it
     
  10. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    Paula,

    This isn't a Christian forum. If all you want to do is share sickening religious fantasies with each other then you should go to one of the many Christain forums that cater specifically to the self deluded.

    This is a debate and discussion forum and I have no doubt I have a valid point. That you might not agree with my viewpoint is your problem but you can't exclude me from stating it.

    Kat
     
  11. Neildo Gone Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    5,306
    Yes, this isn't a Christian-only forum, but the thread mainly is. No need to rain on their parade as much as you may disagree with them. There are many threads in these forums and it's not hard to skip over this one.

    There's a time and a place to voice your differing opinion, but this needn't seem like the one.

    - notta christian
     
  12. Walker Hard Work! Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    770
    Neildo: Non-Christians have just as much right to post here as anyone else, regardless of the topic.

    Katazia: Christians can post on the forums as much as they like...even if their stories are hokey.

    But Neildo: I think Kat is right in that you probably won't get as much response as you might about this kind of thing here as you would on some other forum. At least, not the kind you want.
     
  13. c20H25N3o Shiny Heart of a Shiny Child Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,017
    Hi,

    Its a free thread. Its no problem to hear other views. I understand peoples cynicism because I was no different. I was pretty awful to other people who tried to talk to me about their faith once upon a time.
    I dont mind being called an exagerrator. Its only words. I think people like to believe that people with stories like mine fit them around a common pattern. The truth is though that what I wrote is probably under-exagerrated because it is hard to find words that will make sense to people and fairly hard to type it all out

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

    . I had no faith, no intention of having faith and yet I was healed. How could I make up a full 'healing' ???
    I can only speak of what I see and hear.

    I would say this though - What invokes the emotion in you Kat that says

    I can understand you sitting there with your unbelief, writing it off as 'same ol same ol stories' but why would you then feel compelled to spit venom into a thread. Are the quotes above not melodramatic?

    peace

    c20
     
    Last edited: May 21, 2004
  14. Neildo Gone Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    5,306
    Yes, but for anti-Christians to post something against them every single time and in every single thread is nothing short of being an ass. The same for the skeptics in the pseudoscience forums.

    It's one thing to do anti-whatever rantings in threads made for that, but c'mon, when someone is trying to make a peaceful thread, chill out a bit and let them have their fun. It's called R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

    - N
     
  15. Walker Hard Work! Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    770
    I think a lot of us get edgy, or even downright aggressive, becaue so many people try mass evangelism tactics or preach hate on the forums. I don't know you, neildo, so I won't make any crass assumptions. But perfectly reasonable people get subjected to a lot of crap here on SciForums, largely in the name of God.
     
  16. c20H25N3o Shiny Heart of a Shiny Child Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,017
    I agree that people get spammed by the mass evangelist thing but this thread was intended to allow poeple of all different faiths to gain some insight into another's and particulary why that person came to their faith. It was not intended to be any sort of preaching. i even state that i 'do not preach'.

    This could have been a very peaceful thread that allowed peoplle to ask questions about saome 'passive' text if they so wish.
    The title of the thread was pretty explicit therefore if people dont want to be mass evangelised then they are probably advised to 'skip over' a thread that has something about Christians in it. Although as i state, I am not trying to convert anybody, I just wanted to post my story up on the net and give others the chance to read and discuss if they so wish.

    Kat did not want to discuss, instead she wanted to diminish my testimony in a way that made me out to be a weak person in my actions / experiences and subsequent belief system.

    Had Kat positioned herself like this ...

    c20, Is it not possible that you were delusional because of the stress you were under ...

    I would have been able to reply ...

    'I was not delusional but its a good question Kat thank you, I am sure others may think that initially, however ...'

    This would be discussion. To rant about what you personally find 'sickening' when no-one is preaching to you is a manifestation of 'ego' and does not really fit into the spirit of the thread.

    If you dont want to read about someones experieces just dont read. it really is as simple as that.

    peace

    c20
     
  17. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    Neildo,

    All threads are inclusive of the forum so no thread can exclude others.

    Why not if I find the issues debatable and seriously questionable?

    Why would I want to skip an opportunity to voice my views on something that I feel is important?

    On the contrary, this was perfect – proselytizing and preaching is not in the spirit or intention of this forum, and what I have done is introduced critical debate which is entirely appropriate.

    Kat
     
  18. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    Walker,

    I entirely agree, but my point wasn’t that they shouldn’t post here but that they have no right to use the forum as Christian support group meeting and not expect any debate or criticism.

    Kat
     
  19. DoctorNO Ultra Electro Agnostic Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    719
    All I can say is religion is good if it helps you become a caring, tolerant, and law abiding citizen.

    So good for you, c20.
     
  20. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    Neildo,

    I don’t see your point. If Christians want to debate and share testimonies among themselves without criticism then they must go to another forum where dissenters are not permitted.

    The objective here is debate and discussion, heated or otherwise, it is not meant to be a mutual appreciation society for nice people who always agree with each other. If you are tired of a relentless onslaught against religious beliefs then you are probably in the wrong forum.

    Why? I find anything that provides support or encourages religious beliefs to be objectionable and an opportunity to interject those objections and make the opposing case in the spirit of this forum.

    Nonsense, what you are requesting is surrender or a truce, and I don’t see that religionists deserve any such leeway.

    If you want to post pro-religion issues only then you must go somewhere other than sciforums.

    Kat
     
  21. Katazia Black Mamba Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    743
    DoctorNo,

    Do you realize that a strong belief in Disney’s Mickey Mouse who also espouses those values would be of equal or superior value to Christianity?

    My point is that religion is not needed and we achieve the same result through rational morality rather than illogical superstitions.

    Kat
     
  22. Walker Hard Work! Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    770
    Kat: Yeah, exclusivism pisses me off, too.
     
  23. DeeCee Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,793
    Err...
    I had a couple of dudes turn up on my doorstep a few months ago. I open the door and there's two fella's dressed like MIB's Black suit white shirt y'know the type. They tell me they're conducting a survey so I sez shoot away. The first few questions are pretty harmless. "How long have you lived here?" "Do you consider yourself community minded?" and so on. They seemed keen to come into my house and chat about it but I held my ground and kept control of the doorway. Then BAM they hit me with something like "Has Jesus a place in your heart?" At that point the gloves come off and I tell them that Cuthulu lord of eternal night holds my heart in thrall and would they like to come to the coven and hear his words of power? Of course Cuthulu is a work of fiction but the MIB's education obviously never got as far as Lovecraft.
    You should have seen those boys faces drop

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!


    I asked them in so we could discuss their devotion to the false prophet and start them on the true path.
    I was almost disapointed when they declined and ran for the front gate.

    Now I 'aint no christian but I guess those boys were.
    It's just a shame there not on the board to post that particular testimony I'd just love to hear their side of the story

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!



    Thats what we need, interesting stuff I'm tired of all this "Jesus groped me with his hand of peace" nonsense
    Lets have something meaty!
    Any offers?
    Dee Cee
     

Share This Page