Thread: The Most Offensive Jokes Ever!!!

  1. #1021
    Philpot
    Guest

    Smile Hi everybody, just found this site. How about nursery rhymes. Try this for starters.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Flemster View Post
    Being English, I, along with most of my fellow countrymen, deal with tragedy and adversity in a unique way.
    After something terrible has happenned, usually on a national level, we begin circulating very poor taste jokes.

    Now, I was wondering weather anyone could remember the most tasteless jokes they've ever heard.
    If so, stick 'em here, along with the cultural reference, and we can all laugh/wince/pretend-to-be-above-it-all at them!

    I'll start the ball rolling with a joke I received via text about the time all the Michael Jackson revalations were hitting the papers:

    "What's worse than than having Michael Jackson babysit your kids?

    Having Ian Huntley bath them."

    Ooof!

    The Flemster.
    Hi everyone, just found this site and have enjoyed so far. How about updated nursery rhymes. Try this for starters.

    Old mother hubbard went to the cuboard to get the postman a letter,
    When she got there the cuboard was bare, so they did it without, it was better!!

  2. #1022
    Colostomy-its not my bag slotty's Avatar
    Posts
    885
    well salman rushdie has got a knighthood for winding up the muslims, and he's really going for a seat in the house of lords with a new book .

    its called "Buddha is a cunt"

  3. #1023
    Why do Arab women have red dots on their foreheads?







    Target practice for their husbands

  4. #1024
    A black and a Mexican are in a car.... who's driving?
















    The police

  5. #1025
    Scholar Of Shen Zhou Fugu-dono's Avatar
    Posts
    309
    George W. Bush won presidency again...




  6. #1026
    sasquatch
    Guest
    So Dick Cheney had his finger on the button for a day. GeeDubb had to go in for a colonoscopy. They removed 5 polyps and Stephen Harper's Tilley hat.....

  7. #1027
    8 foreign doctors
    3 bombs
    no deaths


    Harold Shipman: 1 doctor
    1 syringe
    300 dead

    Makes you proud to be British!

  8. #1028
    ...
    Last edited by hypewaders; 07-24-07 at 06:07 AM.

  9. #1029
    bcs07
    Guest
    today im going to mock the suicide bombers

    i would'nt like to be one of there teachers there like 007's the've a small life expectancy
    this is how they take there class
    "im only going to show you this once so watch closley"

    Q whats worse than an english man in a canoe
    A a suicide bomber in a canoe beside you

    stand up for the ulster men
    Last edited by bcs07; 07-26-07 at 06:01 AM. Reason: hate suicide bombers

  10. #1030
    whatever you do in this world, the end is the same, death.

  11. #1031
    bcs07
    Guest
    change
    Last edited by bcs07; 07-27-07 at 07:40 AM.

  12. #1032
    bcs07
    Guest
    abcdefghijklmnopqrsvuwxyz
    Last edited by bcs07; 07-27-07 at 07:40 AM. Reason: bored

  13. #1033
    bcs07 your posts are not funny. Half of them are just racist statments.

    Also explain how:

    half of my family live in england sofar i dont think any of them were flooded

    Is meant to be a joke. It's just a random statement about the floods in England.

  14. #1034
    bcs07
    Guest
    emo jokes

    *How many emo's does it take to change a lightbulb?
    None, they'd rather sit in the dark and cry about it.

    *How many emo kids does it take to paint a wall?
    Depends on how hard you throw them

    *What's better than 50 emo kids nailed to a tree?
    One emo kid nailed to fifty trees.

    *how many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    3,One to replace it, & two to write a poem about how they miss the old one

    *did you hear about that new emo pizza??? It cuts itself!

    *If a blonde and an emo kid jump off a building and hit the ground at the same time, who dies first?

    The blonde, she drowns in the emo kid's tears.

    *What's the difference between an Emo kid and a dead baby?
    The baby doesn't cry.

    *What do you call an emo kid outside the mall?
    Anything he'll cry no matter what you do.

    *What's emo's favourite film?
    Suicider-Man 2

    *How do you get an emo down from a tree?
    cut the rope!!

  15. #1035
    Ant
    Guest
    Mickey Mouse is in court during a divorce tribunal with Minnie. The judge says;
    "I'm sorry Mr. Mouse but I can't grant you a divorce on the grounds that you say she has big teeth"
    Mickey replies; "I didn't say shes got big teeth, I said she's fucking Goofy!"

  16. #1036
    rocafeller69
    Guest
    What do you say when you wake up and see your tv floating in the sky....

    Drop it nigger!

  17. #1037
    Registered Senior Member
    Posts
    1,667
    a woman is stand ing on the traim tracks chanting 21 21 21 adn a blonde comes up to her and goes can i join in and she go sure so they bothe sit there chanting 21 21 21 and then the woman goes to the blonde " im just going to get a drink you stay there ill be back in a second. so as the other woman steps of the tracks the blond stays and get hit by a train, the woman comes back and starts canting 22 22 22

  18. #1038
    Little boy blue. He needed the money.

  19. #1039
    troaty mouth best song ever pjdude1219's Avatar
    Posts
    14,759
    the aristacrats

  20. #1040
    Sikots
    Guest
    Did everyone die inhere?

    Bring jokes please!!!111oneoneoneeleven

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