Women more attracted to non-smiling men

Discussion in 'Human Science' started by Magical Realist, Aug 22, 2014.

  1. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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    "A note to single dudes: If you're looking to pick up a woman at a bar, whatever you do -- don't smile at her.

    Women are actually less sexually attracted to smiley, happy men, suggests a new University of British Columbia study, published online today in the journal Emotion. If that's surprising to you -- it was surprising to lead researcher Jessica Tracy, too. "I wouldn’t have believed it if we didn’t go out and replicate it three times," says Tracy, an assistant psychology professor at UBC.

    Researchers asked more than 1,000 volunteers to rate the sexual attractiveness of hundreds of images of the opposite sex. (All were heterosexual, ages 17 to 49 years, with a median age of 21. Fifty-two percent of participants were Asian, and 48 percent were Caucasian.) In the images, the men and women pictured were demonstrating one of three emotions: happiness, pride or shame -- plus a "neutral" image thrown in there, too. They found that women ranked the smiling guys as less attractive -- but they were into the prideful and ashamed men. But the male participants were most attracted to the smiling women, and least attracted to the ones who seemed proud..."===http://www.nbcnews.com/health/body-odd/want-catch-ladys-eye-dont-smile-study-says-f1C6437381

    Question to all you women: Why are non-smiling men more attractive? Is it a mystique thing?
     
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  3. zgmc Registered Senior Member

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    Smiling is a sign of weakness. :-\
     
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  5. C C Consular Corps - "the backbone of diplomacy" Valued Senior Member

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    Studies based on static photo appearances are wonko, anyway. They're essentially measuring the attractiveness of specific fantasy or autoerotic material for a general population. In the real world, social interaction with the individual and a horde of other factors contribute.

    "We know that women like the bad boy. The James Dean, Edward the vampire — all these guys who are very broody, we know that women find them attractive," said Jessica Tracy, the study's lead researcher. Tracy said there was no clear explanation why the bad boy is more attractive, only that he stokes a woman's carnal instincts more than the nice guy with the smile. link

    "Why Women Chose Bad Boys: Ovulating Women Perceive Sexy Cads as Good Dads" was released a couple of years ago. Even if one bought into this "scientific" resurrection of the historic, oppressive, ludicrous idea that women's brains suddenly fall-out because of biochemistry, it would stretch credulity that the vast majority of the female volunteers happened to be simultaneously biasing the result of the research above for that reason.
     
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  7. Locust Registered Member

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    Generalization. I know few women who likes warm smile.
     
  8. cosmictraveler Be kind to yourself always. Valued Senior Member

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    The ones I meet only are interested in how much money I had and didn't give a shit about if I smiled or not.
     
  9. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

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    It should be mentioned here that all such preferences are expressed at the borderline: that is, evolutionary impulses suggested by effects in any given model usually explain 5-10% of all variance in any dependent variable, which in this case is attraction. That's sufficient for long-term, multigenerational evolutionary purposes, but will not be a uniform predictor for any given interaction. The science of biology is always "trendy". This might be more or less so for humans compared to other animals, since humans have a large, slippery forebrain conferring a large, slippery personality which may tend to muddle inferences even from studies in our own species, many of which also conveniently suffer from small sample size. (There is less 'bang for your buck' in the economics of human research than almost anything else.) Too, we experience environment that is complex and ephemeral, and also that is stable in other ways. The girl at the bar may not care whether you smile - although against a sample of say 10 or 100 girls, you might have 5-10% more luck than otherwise.
     
  10. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    Oh I don't think its ludicrous at all. I have known quite a few women who are specifically attracted to men they actually KNOW are bad in general or bad for them or treat them badly and yet they choose to remain in those kinds of relationships. They usually get hooked emotionally and sexually to these kinds of men and the drama and trauma those relationships offer. These women are often referred to as "victims" but I don't see them as such, I think they are just an inverted version of the men they're attracted to and get off on the abuse whether it be emotional or physical. It may not be a politically correct assertion but that doesn't make it any less true. And here's the thing, if you listen carefully to these kinds of women they have a long history of bad boyfriends, its never just a fluke, they repeatedly and systematically find the asshole in the room as if with a homing signal. That's very different from the women who have mostly healthy relationships with emotionally responsible men but then discover they are in a relationship with a cad. These women will quickly run the moment they feel or discover that the man they are involved with is displaying "bad boy" traits. These women also learn from these bad encounters quite quickly and then screen better ensuring they avoid these bad boys in the future.
     
  11. cosmictraveler Be kind to yourself always. Valued Senior Member

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    I knew a man once that told me how he enjoyed beating his GF until she was unconscious. I didn't know him for very long because his GF shot him through the head. Some women know what to do but never pull the trigger as this woman did.
     
  12. wellwisher Banned Banned

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    Smiling is a part of our natural human body language and reflects inner happiness. However, because of will power, one can reverse engineer an illusion of inner happiness, by using smiling in a willful way that you practice; cart before the horse. An actor can smile when they are sad, yet appear happy to the unsuspecting. Most women would prefer to see the real man, with their body language from the inside, defining what is appearing on the surface. Smiling is too easy to scam with and can be used to hide the real person. Nobody purposely goes out and tries to look unhappy, so a women will see this as a better path to a real person.

    With men this will be different. Men expect to see the women wear make-up with a painted smile part of her glamorous costume. Men also know once you remove the make up and smile there will be another person there. But with sex so linear within the man's mind, a smile for better sex, is a fair trade. She does not have to be sincere as long as her skills are there to go along with the fantasy.

    Gals are not linear to sex but prefer more from the man, with a real man in his defects better than a pretend man.
     
  13. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    pheromones!
     
  14. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    I disagree. Some women never intend to pull the trigger, or pack their bags, or send the break up text or email, they get addicted to the traumatic bond. Furthermore if a woman goes from the physically abusive boyfriend to the emotionally abusive boyfriend and then to the verbally abusive boyfriend only to end up with the sexually and financially abusive boyfriend then its not the individual men but the woman. Its the woman who is choosing that type of man and they do so for a reason. I don't know if you know the type, they are always speaking of the drama of it all, what he did to her, the confusion, The Tears! The Pain! THE GLORY! But she will never leave. She will garner social sympathy for being the "victim" and he the brute but she really isn't a victim, she's a participant. Put a nice decent respectful guy in the room with one of these gals and they would be not attracted AND bored.
     
  15. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

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    Jesus. Enjoyed doing it. As in: it was like a pastime. Glad she shot him, but the things people put up with are madness.
     
  16. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    I had a friend, Harry from the army whose wife ,Kathy would goad him into hitting her, then guilt trip him. It was a pattern completely in her control, of which he was the victim. He didn't even seem aware that she was gaming him. I tried to educate the poor wretch. One day, I was explaining my observations to him while our wives were out shopping. I was telling him that picking a marital fight was easy, and defusing it was also easy. Just then, the women came in carrying bags of groceries, so, I bellowed "Where the hell have you been!!!" And instantly created 2 enemy combatants.
    Turning to Harry, I said "See how easy that was?". Then I laughed as I got up and helped with the groceries apologizing and saying, "I was just tugging your chain". And they became friendly again. Then, I turned to Harry and said, "See what I mean?".
    It seemed that Harry gained a bit more control after that, but Kathy was a lot smarter than Harry, and had her own needs.
     
  17. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    "Two enemy combatants", LOL!

    But you see Harry wasn't really abusive, he was just responding to his buttons being pushed. I think men like Harry are a different ball and game compared to men who are prone to initiate abuse whether it be physical violence, emotional, sexual or financial abuse.
     
  18. Bells Staff Member

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    24,270
    Well of course. Harry is the true victim here because his wife made him hit her. As in literally picked up his hands and caused herself harm with it. She held his hand and she drove his hand to hit her.

    Poor guy.

    In fact, those poor poor guys and girls who abuse their respective others because 1) they were asking for it, 2) obviously the victims want it because it allows them to be the victim, 3) they drove and pushed for their respective others to hit them to cause them pain, 4) because everyone likes being beaten, threatened, raped... In case you weren't aware, all of these are mere excuses and what offenders always spout.

    We will just ignore all the science which clearly shows that the level of emotional and psychological abuse victims suffer and are led to believe that this is what they deserve or all they deserve and that it is normal. We'll ignore the threats to their lives, their children and families if they do leave or even tell someone. We'll also ignore the fact that victims rarely ever tell others about their abuse, so declaring they are doing it just so they can play the victim is blatantly false and once again plays into the wants and desires of abusers.

    Paedophiles and rapists also often have the same MO.. Blame the victims for their own shortcomings.

    Ya, poor guy for hitting his wife. Clearly he is the abused one in that situation.

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  19. Bells Staff Member

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    It depends.

    If the guy is grinning like an idiot all the time, I would be concerned about his mental capabilities or that he had something to hide. Case in point. My cousin married a guy who was always happy, always always smiled. Rarely showed any strong emotions. Happy happy happy with all the corresponding smiles. He was "nice". I moved to the city and we lost contact for a few years.. She and he were overly religious and frankly, it drove me up the wall. We rarely saw each other.

    Three years later, I get a call from her at my work, she was crying, upset and peeing blood. I rushed from my work, drove 45 minutes down the coast to her house, she was lying on the floor of her living room. That was where he had left her after bunching her so hard in her stomach and her sides that she peed blood. I called the paramedics and she was rushed to hospital. At the time, I did not know that he had done this to her. I found that out later when the bruises started to show. Apparently he'd been beating her for a while. Usually it's to the back of her head where her hair hid the bruises. She was so terrified, she did not leave. She thought she deserved it. The day she was punched in her kidneys, she had dared to talk back to him when he ordered her to make sure to be home by 5:30pm on the dot. She had made a quip about traffic. So she blamed herself. If only she had just kept her mouth shut.. And after he threatened her daughters and their son, repeatedly, she was so ashamed that she still has not left. After all, what would everyone think? She feels she deserves it.

    Smiling men aren't always good men.
     
  20. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    No you have misinterpreted what I have written. There are men who are not abusive men but can be in an abusive or unhealthy relationship. If you are with a man or woman who goads you into behaviour that isn't the norm for you then you are actually being stressed by a constant bombardment of button pushing (it happens to women as well) because crazy people can make you feel crazy and behave outside the norm. Abusive men (they're usually personality disordered) are abusive to any woman they are in a relationship with AND they are particularly good at choosing the kind of women that will put up with the behaviour. And don't kid yourself because there are women who actually seek out these kind of men.

    Your studies don't account for the numerous women who were in abusive relationships and left. It also doesn't account for the numerous women who were in one abusive relationship and forever after chose healthy relationships.

    I don't know why you are going on about "they were asking for it" or any of that because if you really understood my posts u would see those aren't my assertions. There are women who time after time after time will choose an unhealthy relationship that contains all kinds of abuse (physical, emotional, financial, sexual). I'll give you a real world example. What would you say of a woman who tells you she has just left a husband of 10 years who was emotionally abusive. Whew! Yay! She's out. Then this woman gets into a relationship right on the heels of this 10 year abuse. She gets into a relationship with a new man but was warned by those who know him that the guy is ill (lying, cheating etc). She then goes on to tell you that she really doesn't want that in her life (sniff, sniff) because of all the past trauma. She says she already sees signs of his abuse even though the relationship is under 2 months. What has he done? He almost drowns her in a pool and then tells her he was kidding, punches her during sex. She's aware that he's a sick man because she was warned by his own family members. So what do you think she does after she is warned that he's sick? She decides to move him in with her where she's forced to financially support him because he doesn't work. This same specimen will tell you of her life of misery, she will complain and sob about the abuse, she will go on to tell you the time she was raped which is why she can only enjoy rough sex. The time she was almost murdered, she's lucky to be alive. The time she was stalked etc. If you call her out on the abuse she mentions and say something like kick him out or call the police she will then backtrack and tell you its not so bad.

    Are you trying to tell me that this woman doesn't actually welcome abuse? She gets off on it.

    Its like the women who seek out convicted psychopath serial killers or murderers and decide to marry them ie. Carrol Ann Boone http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkjfyERs5Jc. Boone sought out Bundy before he was convicted and after being aware of his crimes. So she knowingly chose a psychopathic serial killer. Why? And what does your studies have to show about a woman who does that? Killers Lyle and Erik Menendez are both married after being convicted of executing their parents, again women who sought after them.

    Sure Pedo's and rapists blame their victims. Its the trait of the sociopath, psychopath, narcissist to blame their victims. But I'm not talking about victims, I'm talking about willing victims. Women who will complain about their abuse but would never leave even if they can do so safely. I mean the kind of women who are only attracted to abusive men because they are addicted to the drama and they enjoy their position. If their abuser leaves them they go out and find another one. They are bored with decent men even if they claim to want one.

    Its like the people who insist on keeping Tigers or other dangerous wild animals in their home. They pretend that they have a special relationship to their wild pets and when they end up in the emergency room after a life threatening attack they will ignore any advice to have the pets removed. Instead of relinquishing the animals they decide to keep them anyway (they'll be more careful next time). These are folks who have a death wish fetish and the women I am describing are psychologically inverted to that of their abusers. They hone in on men who abuse (and the abusers hone into them) because they enjoy those kinds of relationships, they don't ever admit it of course. They may wail and complain because they love the sympathy that being a 'victim' affords but they are not like the blindsided victims who when out of a sick relationship get help and try to rebuild a healthy life with healthy relationships. These babes are different, they do exist and they are more prevalent that your politically correct mindset will allow you to believe.


    Grace Jones expresses it best in the following lyrics.



     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2014
  21. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    The retailer in us would like to think that one size fits all. However, people and relationships are a lot more complicated than that. What seems abhorrent to some of us seems common to others.
    Do not judge what you do not understand.
     
  22. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    Yeah, yeah I bet that's what Bernd Jürgen Armando Brandes said before he volunteered himself up to Armin Meiwes for dinner.

    Who's judging? I'm saying these people are out there and that there are many women who are willing victims, people who get off on sick situations. As I don't judge I also don't sympathize. I think these people get exactly what they are looking for.

    Hell I don't even think it fair to convict Meiwes since he didn't go out stalking an unwilling victim. What he was involved with was consensual. I feel the same way about the woman I described, I don't blame the guy she's with because she went in eyes wide open while pretending they are shut. The women I feel sympathy with are the ones who are devastated by something they didn't see coming because they were duped, conned or caught in a trap.

    Now if this is something you "understand" then perhaps you should offer explanation. Go ahead. Knock yourself out.
     
  23. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    No, it isn't the least bit surprising. We've known for a long time that women like the bad boys.

    I'd be more impressed if somebody else replicated the result.
     

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