Ready ... aim ... duck! Wow French snafu leaves seventeen injured Don't bother writing your own punch line for this one. It would be crass to do so: Seriously, it's not that I'm drawing a blank, but .... ____________________ Notes: BBC News. "French shooting show injures 17". June 30, 2008. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7480483.stm
im not going to post the substance of this because its to intermingled with pics ect to sort out This was a story from media watch which is a TV show on the ABC aimed at showing what the media is really like. I would say its like a current afairs show but for the media. Anyway i was looking through there articals and i came across this one on a radio program by Kyle and jackie-o. They are the same team who has taken over hoasting big brother which says alot about there inteligence but some of these stunts really really take the cake. Well see for yourself
Cow Farts! Cow Farts! Argentina studies flatulent cows to combat global warming Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Moo? Collecting cow farts for study. (Photo by Reuters) Just think of it this way: We've painted ourselves into such a corner that we have to take cow farts seriously. On the other hand, the numbers are shocking. Rupert Neale reports for the Telegraph that: • Methane "is 23 times more effective at trapping heat in the atmosphere than carbon dioxide". • Cow farts account for thirty percent of Argentina's total greenhouse emissions. • Argentina has around fifty-five million cows. • Each animal produces between eight hundred and a thousand litres of farts each day. Now, the math is pretty cool. Cattle in Argentina put over fifty trillion litres of farts into the atmosphere every day. Neale also reports that research suggests cow farts could be reduced by a quarter by switching the cattle from grain to a diet of clover and alfalfa. This would equal about a seven and a half percent reduction in Argentina's total greenhouse emissions. Seriously, this is what it comes to. Bill Maher complains that meat is causing people to starve, and environmentalists are taking up the crusade against meat. We might not be able to stop having more children than we can afford, or driving single-occupancy cars and SUVs everywhere (unless, of course, gasoline gets too expensive), but by gum, we're going to take cow farts seriously. Don't get me wrong. We do need to consider bovine emissions, but hello, can we all wake up now and admit there's a problem? Even the global warming deniers: just try this one on, "Holy shit, now they're arguing about farts!" ____________________ Notes: Neale, Rupert. "Cow farts collected in plastic tank for global warming study". Telegraph. July 9, 2008. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/new...in-plastic-tank-for-global-warming-study.html See Also: Maher, Bill. Real Time With Bill Maher #614. HBO. April 18, 2008. http://www.billmaher.com/?page_id=233 "Eating beef 'is less green than driving'". Telegraph. July 23, 2007. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1557846/Eating-beef-'is-less-green-than-driving'.html
You have been warned You Have Been Warned .... Stop reading now Via The Smoking Gun: Um ... yeah. Insert (damn it!) punch line here. Better yet, don't. ____________________ Notes: Hughes, S. "Incident number: 08F123002". Fort Wayne Police Department. August 5, 2008. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/0806082hammer1.html
See, that's what happens when your arse gets nailed by Norsefire! You need a goddam clawhammer to denail your sorry arse. /snigger
you know what desterbs me most about this? why the fuck did the cops care? why did he even stick his nose into it?
I'm representing the poor laddie in court. Our defence goes something like this;..Your Honour, my client was merely confused, he had heard that one must move the mountain to Mohammad and misunderstood it as-mounting and removing my hammer! We throw ourselves on the mercy of the court.
i would have the cop charged with beeing a peeping tomPlease Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Rape and puppies Um ... okay Daily Mail suggests owner of cloned dog raped Mormon missionary Right. So ... um ... yeah. So The Times thinks they have confirmed that the one is, in fact, the other, and over at The Guardian, David Batty is covering the story as well. But from the Mail's original coverage, we might note a couple of punch lines: • Joyce McKinney was a beauty queen in the 1970s and was a former Miss Wyoming before going to Brigham Young University, in Utah, to study drama • McKinney met the similarly bailed May and the pair fled to Canada, using false passports and disguised as deaf-mute mime artistes. Is there any such thing as "normal" weird news? ____________________ Notes: "A cloned dog, a Mormon in mink-lined handcuffs and a tantalising mystery". Daily Mail. August 7, 2008. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...mink-lined-handcuffs-tantalising-mystery.html See Also: Bone, James and Dominic Kennedy. "Missing years in Bernann McKinney's strange journey from Mormon sex case to clones called Booger". The Times. August 8, 2008. http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article4481742.ece Batty, David. "Joyce McKinney: from Mormon manacling to dog cloning". Guardian NewsBlog. August 8, 2008. http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/news/2008/08/joyce_mckinney_from_mormon_man.html
The ballad of Bernann McKinney There was a mad woman from Surrey Who fucked a fat priest in a flurry of passion and lust but left him for dust when she met a bully who licked on her cunny She moved out to North Carolina the mutt wedged between her vagina As lovers they howled on all fours she growled with booger nut deep inside her When booger departed she was quite broken hearted but he died not in vain she cloned him again and once more her legs were a parted
As stupid as they wanna be? But ... Mom! Moronic burglar encounters mother, botches job It's possible that, when it comes time for his prison beat-down, a 22 year-old failed burglar will be spared physical agony as his fellow inmates all succumb to hemorrhages, laughing themselves to death: Perhaps the cruelest thing is the impact this will have on the children. Okay, maybe. But think of it this way: kids who aren't born yet will, twenty years from now, cringe as they hear the story told over Thanksgiving dinner yet again. Maybe one of them will masturbate over the cranberry sauce in an act of self-sacrifice, so they'll tell a different story come Christmas. Still, though, we might wonder at the awkward moment. "But ... Mom! You're supposed to be getting your damn nails done!" _____________________ Notes: Arnsdorf, Isaac. "Would-be burglar surprised to find victim at home: his mother". SeattleTimes.com. August 20, 2008. http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008125586_webbreakin19m.html
Cle the (expletive) Elum? I didn't know where else to put this, so ... here: Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Really? In Cle Elum? (Photo credit: Kelly O) Really, if you knew Cle Elum, this would be ... well, maybe not hilarious, but certainly worth a grin.
Something about the little children goes here .... The Relevant Question ... Survey says? Via Slog: Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Hmm ... A real noodle-scratcher for the cynical. (Photo by Jennifer) Suffer the little children to come unto ye?
maybe he's into masturbation. maybe he needs to treat his genital warts. I wish I could have gone to the service to find out!
I have no idea how to post a url but it is www.exitmundi.nl Basically all the ways the world could come to an end, from mass spontaneous suicide to the eventual decay of every particle in existence. I have no idea where else to mention this AWESOME site. There is also some poorly researched stuff on the bible, if you like that sort of thing.
