Are you happy?

Discussion in 'General Philosophy' started by Soulcry, Apr 2, 2003.

  1. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    9,879
    You are right we do recall happiness! But it does not help bring us closer to the feeling of joy.

    "No grief surpasses this,
    In the midst of misery to remember bliss." Dante

    I thank thee Dearprudence. You said some things I needed to hear.
     
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  3. Guyute Senior Member Registered Senior Member

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    blah blah

    All people are different, money makes some(if not all) people happy, good friends make some people happy, and circumstance also plays a factor in a person's happiness. Am i happy? no.

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  5. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    Guyute:

    Why are you not happy?


    Money is a high, friends are wonderful, but think about it how many rich successful people, all of whom I am sure has at minimum one friend, kills themselves anyway out of misery? or perhaps they just linger in misery.
     
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  7. Guyute Senior Member Registered Senior Member

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    thanx

    I beleive that the reasons for me not being happy at the moment are meerly circumstancil(not spelt correctly). I am having a ruff time with a friend and at the rate things are going now it dosent look good for me and her. Well, time heals all wounds.

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  8. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    That is the reason for my despair also (I was mindfucked then dumped. Decided to write an erotic short story about it called MINDFUCK). I guess time only really heals a wound if its processed properly. What about primal wounds like those we gather in childhood? They take forever to heal sometimes. I think I just have the monumental task of sitting with pain, which is why Dearprudence comments were meaningful for me. I think if I can learn to tolerate pain I will be happier.

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    Did that make any sense?
     
  9. Guyute Senior Member Registered Senior Member

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    by the way...........That is a good point, people do kill themselves out of misery eventhough they might have money or friends........they do this because lose an somthing that is very dear to the human race....Hope....it is the hope that somthing better will happen is what keeps people alive.....people who commit sucide are people who have lost hope.....they freefall into a pit of despair.....i agree with you that misery is the feeling that drives a person to lose hope. Very good points Lucysnow....thank you, you have made me a little bit happier

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  10. Guyute Senior Member Registered Senior Member

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    RE

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    earprudence




    But what is the quality of their "happiness"? How honest is it? Typically, if you're talking about the bourgeoisie or les nouveaux riches who *appreciate* capital because they salivate its status-value or its comfort-security-blanket, then they'll only be too happy to display it, either externally or self-consciously. (Barf)



    I totally agree with you on that .

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  11. Clockwood You Forgot Poland Registered Senior Member

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    I am a very insecure person who is rarely content. I am happy when something good happens and I am sad when something bad happens but the effects do not linger. I slide into a sort of equilibrium state where I feel little. (not depression; this does not impede my performance and I have found it actually leaves me very clear headed)

    I do not have good or bad days, I have good or bad minutes.
     
  12. cyberia Lounge Act Registered Senior Member

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    169
    No. Right now I'm tired.
    Tired of working late, tired of ignorance, tired of idiocy tired of people without passion...

    People without passion are the reason I'm tired...
     
  13. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    Cyberia:

    You sound like a man/woman of my tribe. Yes the lack of passion sucks the oxygen from the earth. Passion is the marrow of life. To feel deeply in our sadness happiness anger love sex what-have-you. These days if you present too much passion you either scare people who assume you are crazy while they walk around in their banal luke-warm existance. DONT THEY UNDERSTAND THAT WE WILL COULD ALL DIE AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT!!!
     
  14. cyberia Lounge Act Registered Senior Member

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    169
    omg ... my sentiments exactly!
    Whats the point of still living if you don't do it to the best of your ability? Stupid mediocrit soul suckers!
     
  15. fredx Banned Banned

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    795
    wow, this has been revived and has been turned into quite an amazing post.

    Passionless people is a big problem, I have been thinking the same thing, I am going to make a post about this and I will edit this post to tell you were I put it.

    edit: see my anti-survivor post in art and cult. for more about passionless people.

    Passionless people are not happy.

    Depressed people are not happy either. Some cures for depression:
    1. go easy on yourself
    2. breathe
    3. talk to people
     
    Last edited: May 12, 2003
  16. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    You are right fredx it is important to: 1. take it easy on oneself 2. breathe 3. talk to people

    I think the last is the most important. People cannot reach inside of you and take the pain away but reaching out to others, even if it is only on an internet forum, reminds us that we are not alone and there is strength in that. It also helps us not to take ourselves so seriously. The people in my daily life see me as so strong and in control, such a force of nature that they cannot tolerate or understand if I am vulnerable, confused, or just plain miserable. They don't believe it because I am the one they seek out for strength. I bet there are a lot of us on this forum who suffer the same predicament.

    I personally thank all those anonymous souls who have made the past few days tolerable: fredx, dearprudence, marquis, dickbaby, xev, etc, etc, etc,
     
  17. notme2000 The Art Of Fact Registered Senior Member

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    Had you known me anywhere from a year ago to 7 years ago, you'd know I used to embody depression, and towards the end anxiety as well. But I can now honestly say I am truly happy.
     
  18. spookz Banned Banned

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    happy as a motherfucker!
    seriously? i dont buy into this happy/sad shit. i just am (well most of the time anyway). emotions are for kids
     
  19. Soulcry Registered Senior Member

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    hmm.. so spookz you are a person who doesnt take life serious and think that emotions are for kids but there are people who think life and their emotions very serious.

    I am not sure which one is better though :bugeye:
     
  20. river-wind Valued Senior Member

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    2,671
    from the standpoint of historical Zen teachings, money, stuff, is "euforia", and a temptorary state. To buy things or aquire things is to simply stuff the hole inside yourself with a atemporary fix. Not at all unlike taking drugs or drinking.

    You are most certainly "euforic, but to stay there you require a continual influx of new stuff. A continual input of energy, and of effort. These things also require maintinance to continue to exist over time. They also require energy to be putinto keeping them, ie guarding these things from others so they are not stolen.

    All of these simply keeps you wrapped up in the idea that to be happy you need stuff, and to have stuff is to be happy. But to have stuff, while it makes you happy now, requires that you do what makes you stressed, depressed- work full time. not see your family. not sit on the beach all day. to give up your freedom to another person for 8 hours or more a day in order to maintain the things which "make you happy".

    therefore, I say that this is not happiness. this is an induced high, with a significant draw-back.
    Therefore I try for contentment. I wokr with plans only to stop working. to do the things which require nothing of me, but give me ounces, pounds, and tons of happiness. playing with my nieces/nefew. walking through the forest. drawing a smiling face. For these things, work is not required-it's optional. I'm in control, I don't have to play to the whims of the fickle wants and desires I feel. If I want I can give into them, but I'm not tied into doing it.

    Why work? to make money? why make money? to buy things? why buy things? to have fun? why have fun? because it feels good. What if you didn't work? replace the money made from work in the office with work done at home? take a 2 hour lunch break outside? is that not as fun as throwing up after a night of drinking to forget how infuriating it is at work from 9-5? Which sounds more fun? For my Mom, working 9-5 and then drinking was more fun. But she is miserable 15 hours out of every 24 hour day, and then euforic or asleep for the remaining 9. I'll skip that and go for content for 23 hours out of every day.


    edit: a great story
    A Buddhist Monk is talking to a guy. the guy askes
    "So, what makes Buddhists different than other people"
    The monk replied "We eat, we walk, we talk."
    "But I eat, walk, and sleep"
    "ah, but when we eat, we are aware that we eat. When we walk, we are aware that we walk. When we talk, we are aware that we talk."
     
  21. moementum7 ~^~You First~^~ Registered Senior Member

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    1,598
    lucy snow

    am i happy? do you mean, do i find life tolerable enough to go on living? yes.yes , i choose to live. do i consider the thought of death more painful than bearing with this existence.yes. or do you mean do i reckognize the absolute importance of self esteem and the vital role it has in continuing the role of ones survival.that one should seek guiltless happiness. that it is my right to be happy. that my life is mine and am able to pursue my own highest values whether they be rational (anything that improves my life)or irrational (any thing that destroys my life). yes. do i understand that my senses can only tell me that something exists, but that it is my intellect that allows me to identify it and know it.yes. am i aware that it seems like every body wants to understand thyre existence yet denies theyre only means of attaining it? with theyre intellect, using reason.yes lucy snow, you should stop relying on your feelings to correctly identify existence.it doesnt matter how strongly you feel that the earth SHOULD be round........it is up to your conscious mind to actively focus outwards to identify reality. yes ,existence exists . it is real. What does this have to do with being happy? Everything.you lack certainty. you deny your only means for obtaining knowledge.your mind. not your feelings. emotions are auto matic responses based on the values you have chosen for your self, whether they were consciously chosen or not.Any time you feel unhappiness is because some where in your hierarchy of values, you have sacrificed a higher value for a lower one. the most basic value that people tend to sacrifice, is themselves. fingers are getting tired....... just a thought lucy

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  22. Soulcry Registered Senior Member

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    sigh

    I am not happy at all right now, cause i have to study for my stupid final exam. During these times i always question the system that we live in. We are human beings and need to be free but this system makes us slaves (see my "life is a prison?" post)
    People around me think that i am happy person who doesnt have much problems. In reality my soul is diferent and i question things, i question somethings that other people tend to ignore. And the more i question the less happy i get. I think thats a problem with me and makes me mostly unhappy (from inside)

    I sometimes feel like there is no peresent time for me. Present time flies away by thinking about the things that i ll do in the next minutes or thinking about the recent past. Even in times when i should be happy i think about the future and what kind of problems i ll face. But like i said from outside noone can see this, cause i am a different person from outside

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  23. Mrs.Lucysnow Valued Senior Member

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    To Momentum7 who wrote:

    "am i aware that it seems like every body wants to understand thyre existence yet denies theyre only means of attaining it? with theyre intellect, using reason.yes lucy snow, you should stop relying on your feelings to correctly identify existence.it doesnt matter how strongly you feel that the earth SHOULD be round........it is up to your conscious mind to actively focus outwards to identify reality. yes ,existence exists . it is real. What does this have to do with being happy? Everything.you lack certainty. you deny your only means for obtaining knowledge.your mind. not your feelings. emotions are auto matic responses based on the values you have chosen for your self...
    Any time you feel unhappiness is because some where in your hierarchy of values, you have sacrificed a higher value for a lower one. the most basic value that people tend to sacrifice, is themselves.


    Okay I agree a healthy self-esteem is essential to overall happiness, but even those with a healthy self-esteem experiences unhappiness at some point. Does not our growth stem from discomfort? The impetuous to change? Reality exists but how we interpret that reality seems quite relative. Am I wrong about that? I mean we all have beliefs which filter whatever this said reality is. The mind can only calculate, interpret, critically reason...other than its capacity to set goals how can it lead to overall happiness? I am not sure if I understand? I can agree with you about emotion, it is always changing and one cannot make decisions based solely on how one is feeling, the mind tempers ones behaviour and that is good (keeps me from burning down my neighbors house during pms anyway!

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    ) But one cannot deny ones feelings or it leads to neurosis, repression, I think one must process feeling just as one processes thought. I am not sure if happiness is really something one can strive for, it is there one moment gone the next. One must keep functioning no matter how one is feeling that I can agree with. As for values...yes I do think I need to take stock of my values. They have changed and need re-assessment.
     

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