I think you should go tell your dad he messed up your brain and made you into an spoilt brat and now Baby wants his baa baa!!! If you don't pull your head out of your ass you'll never really experience life. What you are experiencing is short lived dopamine releases (coke, high-stakes gambling, sex, etc...). That's not life as a conscious human. A baby gets the same feelings innately - when they suck on their bottle or pacifier. Or teat for that matter. Well before they really have any complex thought processes. Before language. Understanding. Anything that really makes us human. Sad to think you could live your life with the mental aptitude achieved by a new born baby. And yet, here you are..... Now, your best option is to tell daddy he made Baby mad! Baa Baa Baa Baaaaa!!!! AND NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER!!!! If only Patrick Swayze could sweep you off your feet... Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Tell me if I'm wrong here. But in the here and now more people just shack up together than get married? But 50 years ago getting married was the majority rule? Personally I like a relationship where both parties don't live together and are financially responsible for their own lives. When you do get together you are always looking forward to it sometimes with much anticipation. You never over stay your welcome and then you have your own space back looking forward to the next meeting. I know this from a 10 year experience, but sadly all good things must come to an end.
That's perfectly fine if children are not a part of the relationship. Children need both parents. I believe the stats show single motherhood has the strongest correlation with all the crap you don't really want your child to end up as. Add to that when the mother works and puts her child in a child supervision facility... forget it.
If children are not involved that, I think that arrangement is often only practical if both parties are enjoying some level of success. If you have two people earning $50k-$100K annually each, they can each likely have comfortable homes and cars and whatever else they need depending on where they live. But what if both are less financially independent. What if they each make $10K-$30k annually. That is not enough money to manage rent, car payment, insurance , utilities, food, etc. So the couple trying to maintain 2 homes on these incomes would never have time to develop a relationship because they would be too busy trying to make ends meet. It would also make the need for a relationship stronger, causing each party to lower their standards, usually just looking for someone who can hold a job and pay the bills and overlooking any other shortcomings they may have, like a drinking problem or infidelity. Maybe that is why Muslim's wife stays with him. Maybe she knows he isn't any kind of husband but the money makes it worth it. Or maybe where they come from it is a social taboo for a woman to divorce her husband. But growing up in a working class family and seeing my mom work 3 jobs on occasion I can see why people would get married just to financially survive. But then when they do, they have to option of accepting what they got themselves into, or calling for a mulligan. I have been divorced twice. I was young and stupid at both previous marriages. In hindsight I can see that if money had not been an issue I would have been more selective in my choices. Now, no matter how much money my husband brings in, I want to live in a lifestyle that is within my own personal means. You never know if your spouse will be there when you wake up. They could die in their sleep, or go out for cigarettes and not come back. There are no guarantees in life. You got learn how to make your own way and expect no one else to help you. Even if you have someone who truly loves you and will certainly be there for you. @Muslim, if you care anything about yourself, you must learn to work and provide for yourself. Even if your dad dies you may not get that inheritance. He may not even have as much as you think. If you live in a country where all debts of the deceased are paid before inheritance is given to the children you may find that you inherit debt, not wealth. And if he is wealthy, I'm sure he got his wealth by working. If he owns a company or something he works to keep it successful. If he dies, you may get the company but you won't have it long if you don't know how to run it and are not willing to put forth the effort. If you are some kind of royal family, well leaders that ignore their people and do nothing often lose their post quite quickly, sometimes to assassination. You may want to think about all that.
seagypsy I sure don't disagree with what you said. I was just making a comment about a 10 year personal experience in my life. I've never been able to repeat that type of relationship sense and you can believe I wanted to.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Hey, I'm with you on that. I wish I were able to have that same kind of relationship. It would mean I was financially stable. lol. Now I would like to be ABLE to have that kind of relationship, but I don't know if I would actually want to do it. I like being able to wake up in the middle of the night and snuggle up to my husband among other things lol.
What do you mean, "one day"? He's been posting here for years and it's clear that his life has been like this ever since he joined SciForums, if not long before that. He's very much like Darksidzz in terms of his social skills and attitudes, but he's got a wealthier family. Also more energy, so he's more angry than depressed. As Steven Wright said, "Depression is just anger without the enthusiasm." He's just a sad little boy in a man's body. If he were only a tiny bit less rude, a lot of people would naturally feel sympathy for him. You've been dumping on us for six or seven years, IIRC. So apparently you really don't have anything better to do. Most people like to pair off and build a life together. If your point is that the primary purpose of the institution of marriage itself is to improve the welfare of children, well then okay, we could form permanent pair bonds without marriage, which is rapidly becoming the norm in Europe as it sheds its Christianity. Even Europeans with children are forgoing marriage in increasing numbers, and it doesn't seem to be having any deleterious effect on the kids. It's staying together that counts, not the ring and the certificate. Considering how poorly the legal institution of marriage actually improves the welfare of children, it's not clear that we even need it for that. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Indeed. We don't have children so we're not as rigorous about the role definitions. Nonetheless we grew up in an era when little girls were taught to cook and little boys were taught to play stupid games involving violence and balls of various shapes, so Mrs. Fraggle does the cooking. Nonetheless, at any level of education and experience, women earn less than men. Factor in even the shortest reasonable gap in the work record for maternity, and at best a woman is lucky if her lifetime earnings are 60% of a man's. Its been argued that children need more than that. Homo sapiens is a peculiar species because we live long after our breeding cycle is over. The "elders" in the community, who no longer have children of their own at home, provide services to the rest of the members. Just within a family, grandparents are a very valuable resource. I suspect that it has something to do with the manner in which she achieves the status of a single mother. One of my best friends is a widow, and she has done such a good job of raising her two children that people are in awe of her. She knew from the day he was diagnosed with leukemia that it was just her own damn bad luck and she had to make the most of it. I think that when a husband abandons his wife (whether it's to run off with a floozy, become a monk, discover his true sexual orientation, go to prison, or just decide to circumnavigate the world in a rowboat), it generates feelings that get in the way of doing all the things she needs to do. She told me, "You can't even be angry at him because it's not his fault. All you can do is suck it up and move forward." Considering that their children is all she has left of him, giving them all the attention and care they need, so they grow up to be happy and sensible (this is 12 years later and indeed they have), is a good way to keep him alive in their hearts. That's also open to argument. When Mrs. Fraggle did her hippie-walkabout in the 1960s, she did a tour of duty in a kibbutz in Israel, and her particular kibbutz was participating in a program that has now become quite common there. During the week all of the children are sent to a group home which is run by people with the ability, personality, training (and perhaps a gift from Yahweh Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!) to do a good job of parenting. They only live with their "real" parents on weekends. Four decades later, these kids have turned out to be the most happy, successful, prosperous, educated, tolerant citizens in the whole country. One of the advantages of living in a home with several "parents," is that if one leaves you haven't lost half of your family. It's much less of a shock to make the transition to a new one if there are seven others there for continuity. Oh and following these kids through their lives resulted in an interesting discovery, the Westermarck Effect. Children who are raised together, even if they're not blood relatives, instinctively regard each other as brothers and sisters. Very few of them grow up to marry each other. I have a friend who works with foster organizations in the USA, and he says that many of them have adopted the kibbutz model and they've had the same experience. Their kids grow up to be happy model citizens. In other words, really skillful foster parents can produce better kids than their real mother and father! I've heard more than one person who barely survived childhood ask, "Why can't they pass a law requiring people to qualify for a license before they're allowed to have children?"
Because they haven't yet got a safe vaccination for pregnancy that can be reversed when all the qualifications for having children have been met. But they are working on it.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! A Vaccine Against Pregnancy?
Did you know how the Spartans treated their children? I think Maybe I should be been born in such a society, that might have had a better affect on me. As soon as you come out of the womb if you're not perfect you were left to die, after the age of 7 you were made into a man by military training, kill or be killed mentality, i.e. basically you were the property of the state. Spartiates look it up.
I suspected you were a problem child, but even this kind of thinking sounds a bit extreme. Can you imagine growing up as a Spartan and being turned lose in today's world? Even the terrorist would be taking notes.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
