Did you know jesus was breast feed?

Discussion in 'Religion Archives' started by alexb123, Jun 6, 2008.

  1. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    "blessed is the womb that bare thee and the paps which thou hast sucked. But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God and keep it." (Lk 11:27,28)

    I didn't know this. Do you think he also had nappy rash?

    I know Jesus didn't take on his role until later in life so was he born perfect? Any ideas on Mary's cup size?
     
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  3. Kadark Banned Banned

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    Uh ... so what?
     
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  5. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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    Weird, how do you go from breast feeding to cup size? Did your mother breast feed you? What was her cup size?
     
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  7. synthesizer-patel Sweep the leg Johnny! Valued Senior Member

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    I'd guess at least a DD - I can't see a supreme being knocking up a chick who didn't have a great rack, can you?
     
  8. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    They both involve Mary's tits.

    I think I was breast feed and I don't know my mums cup size. Do you have any spare milk?
     
  9. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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    And you're interested in a 2000 plus year old womans tits? Geriatric love?
     
  10. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    I'm interested in EVERYTHING especially things I have not considered before. Therefore, when I think of Jesus getting his lunch from mary's love melons I wanted to know all about them. Would they have been bra'ed up? Can you imagine if she wasn't and being pregnant and on a donkey? Wow, shame most nativity plays only involve pre-pubescents

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  11. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    Did you say you has enough for a cup of tea?
     
  12. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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    Considering she was about 12 when she gave birth, it seems to me, fantasising about her tits would probably be illegal in this day and age.
     
  13. nicnacuk Registered Member

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    Hi Alex,

    I don't know about nappy rash, but I hear he developed lactose intolerance in later life, so it wasn't all good you know.
     
  14. Orleander OH JOY!!!! Valued Senior Member

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    God couldn't splurge on formula? cheap bastard.
     
  15. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    12? Wow, so God was a pedo!
     
  16. S.A.M. uniquely dreadful Valued Senior Member

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    12 is pretty late compared to other animals I think.
     
  17. alexb123 The Amish web page is fast! Valued Senior Member

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    Wow, an animal in bed at 12 and people say things are bad these days.
     
  18. Prince_James Plutarch (Mickey's Dog) Registered Senior Member

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    Alexb123:

    Epebophile, not pedophile.

    Pedophilia referes to pre-adolescents.

    A woman who can become pregnant is an adolescent.

    It's the time for marrying and mating for most human beings throughout history.
     
  19. iceaura Valued Senior Member

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    12's a bit early for probability at the time, isn't it ? Modern diets have shifted matters. 14 is more likely, especially since her first pregnancy carried to term and went OK ?

    Being the oldest of eight, all breast fed, may be responsible for my lack of especial fascination with breasts, but it's not just that that makes the bizarre reactions to breastfeeding so common in the US so strange.

    It's kind of ordinary, guys. It's how life is supposed to work. Formula sucks - even the diapers smell worse, and the kids are crabby and sick all the time.
     
  20. Randwolf Ignorance killed the cat Valued Senior Member

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    "Q. How old was Mary when Jesus was born?

    The Bible doesn’t tell us how old Mary was when Jesus was born. However, based
    on historical and cultural study, we know that a Jewish girl could get married quite
    young; and so Mary may have been between 14 and 17 years old when she gave
    birth to Jesus."

    source: http://www.answersingenesis.org/assets/pdf/v1i2/christmasQuiz.pdf
     

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