"It will never happen to me"

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I tend to not think of "it will never happen to me"...I rather make sure this whatever it is will never happen to me. Practicing how not to think about things by thinking of something different. Thus when I hear news that some meteorite will strike the Earth and there is 95% chance...rather then hiding the thought in my mind...I imagine it...think of what would happen...how I would die...how I might survive...but then still die...and this makes me relieved of that thought and I forget about it.

 

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That sounds like a good anti anxiety tactic

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Usually when I say "this won't ever happen to me" or "I'll never do [insert act]", it winds up happening or becoming true. Perhaps a reverse self-fulfilled prophecy?

I need to start thinking that I'll never win the lottery.

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- N

 

That's very interesting, myself I have noticed if I say "I don't understand why that person reacted like that to that situation" it will then happen to me in some small dose. Thus I try really hard to undrstand every awful predicament! Not always successful though.

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On behalf of your response I got a story to share:

Long ago there was a merchant and his son
The merchant took his son on the trips from their house to the marketplace, where they sold rice
What was interesting thou is that the boy never listened to his father and did the exact opposite thing
When his father told him to help him carry the rice to the carriage the boy did not
When his father told him to get off the donkey because the poor animals was tired, the boy did not
When his father told him to sit inside the carriage and guard the rice, the boy instead climbed out
And thus the days passed by until one day the merchant and his son were passing by an old wooden peasant bridge...
...Suddenly the bridge collapsed...and the donkey with rice and father have plunged into water
"Son, help me!" cried out father
But son stood there watching his father slowly drown
"Son, help me!" cried yet once again his father
But nothing happened...the boy just stood there watching his father slowly die
Then the merchant remembered that his son did not listen to him and did everything opposing to what was said
so father cried out "Son please do not help me, let me drown"
But to his astonishment...his son proclaimed, "Father you are right...I have realized now that I should listen to you and follow your directions and what you say"
And thus his father drowned.

The moral?...thinking that you will not win the lottery does not increase your chances of winning

 

i think that whatever is going to occur is going to occur because of past decisions made by both me and other people. in a sense it is inevitable, but we determine our own destinies without really even thinking about it.

i also have the mindset that whatever happens causes me to change and to learn something new about the workings of the world around me. so for better or for worse i try to experience it as much as i can and get it through me (or me through it).

action causes reaction--you shouldn't look at it as good or bad, just as what it causes and how it was caused.

 

I try not to think bad things won't happen to me. Not that you can truly be prepared for some of the atrocities of life, but thinking of myself as invincible will only be disappointing once it is evident I am not. Of course, there are degrees of bad and degrees of preparation.

Can I ask you to provide an example of what you perceive to be bad? I don't expect you to necessarily use your own experiences, just your opinion. Some that come to mind for me...homelessness, surprise pregnancy (I realize for some this would not be considered bad), fatal illness, losing a loved one, being the victim of a violent crime, getting hit by a bus. There are so many, and at least one of them (more than likely several) is bound to happen to me.

Imo, believing bad things will never happen probably means that person hasn''t experienced much...whether it's because they're young, sheltered, or just plain fortunate to not have gone through hard times.

 

Positivity and Optimism. It doesnt take a couple of paragraphs to explain. Its nothing to do with religion. Negativity usually leads into stress and depression. Think on.

 

I always think that it will probably not happen to me. I always put doubt into it so I am not suprised if something happens. I take a hard-determinism viewpoint about the universe and human nature so whatever happens can not be changed.

 

Yes! Just be optimistic and good things will come your way! When you are happy and cheerful and optimistic about life, then the same will be attracted to you. You will also live longer! Optimistic, happy people who have a sense of humor are proven too live up to ten years longer through scientific research! So if you think bad things will come your way, then they probably will, because you are already looking for that to happen. Don't be superstitious about life: just enjoy it the best you can. Afterall, we only have one chance to go around. Cheers!

 

There was a joke about optimistic people on the Drew Carry show once... there was a optimist club where everyone was as optimistic as you can get... all the club members died because they were confident they could cross the railroad tracks in their car before the train would cross paths. haha

 

I'm actually the opposite... I always think bad things will happen to me...

 

lmao making the assumption that bad things will most likely occur can only leave you pleasantly surprised when something wonderful happens and more appreciative (in theory).

 

I don't think about bad things happenning either, I am an eternal optimist, but the fact is bad things have. So I do not have the idea in my head 'it will never happen to me' as they have happened to me already.

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This is example of what I meant in response to Neildo. I didn't udnerstand why women in abusive relationships did not just up and leave the abusive partner. Then I had a taster of an abusive relationship myself and I thus 'came to understand'. This is very different to worrying I might be in an abusive relationship. Which I never did.

The ponderance came up when I was telling my friend to pay closer attention to his belongings which he left unguarded when we were out. He said 'I will never be stolen from'. He was sure of this. I myself have been stolen from, I had my flat burgled and have had my purse stolen when left unattended. So for me this is not an unreality. I am thus cautious, but like to think I always was. Although that said, my flat was not insured so perhaps I did then have an element of 'it won't happen to me'. Maybe this is something that changes with experiences.

Agreed as noted above.

 

For all other posters discussing issues of pessimism and optimism I believe I have covered those points in my reply above. It's not really a question of that in my case at least, more relates to what is real. In terms of violence, I have more than my fair share, so I may when in certain situations be aware and prepared as a result and more cautious about going to isolated places on my own. I have been followed a few times and mugged and assaulted when out, so for me this is something I need to be cautious about. But I don't ever hold it in my head that..bad things will happen..I just bear it in mind that somethimes they do.

Although I think it may be the subject for another thread...why do some things seem to happen more to some than to others. This can apply to good and bad things. On the upside, I have had many opportunities to do TV work although I never myself sought these opportunities, they just presented themselves to me at intervals through out my life, age 8, age 11, age 13 , age 27, ranging from being extra, to speaking part to being asked to feature in reality tv program. All offered and not sought out. So while on one hand I seem a tad unlucky, I am also very 'lucky'. Anyone else notice this with themselves or others?

 

Some tend to attract more attention than others. I mean, hello? Hot, fiery redhead! Knock, knock?

That's why you receive the good, of people doing things for you that they might not normally do for others, and it's also the reason why you receive the bad, as you mentioned, being followed, mugged, stalked by creeps, etc.

Being low-key is safer, just not as much fun.

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It's up to you, in general, to weight the good with the bad to decide whether to stick with your current way of life, whatever it may be.

- N

 

you do have a point although in my younger yrs I was more 'minger' than 'ginger' lol and this was just as bad and good! Example one tv role was for a peasant girl as I must've looked like a peasant! lol

 

Somehow, I find that hard to believe.

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- N

 

Iv'e been through a rough life. Sometimes i kind of look back on, but not dwell on how i was when the situation occured. A few times i have been in the wrong. I had more tough times than rosey times, but iv'e just fought through holding on to the hope things will get better and usually they do. Sometimes howewer you're fighting a losing battle. Its how you deal with it that can change things. These are the things that mould you into who you are. A person who has been through the rain and pain of life would be better acquired to deal with it if it pops it bastard head up again. The fortunate ones who are still young enough sometimes go on to become social workers.