avh_2020
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avh_2020

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avh_2020 was last seen:
Mar 29, 2012
    1. Shogun
      Shogun
      Works fine bud :D IMHO she won't come back, but I guess that's too bad for her right?

      Good luck bro! Nice talking to ya! For me personally it was hard for me to get over relationships just a few years back too. It gets easier :D
    2. Shogun
      Shogun
      I know right? :D Girls are crazy when you piss them off...

      If I were you, I'd try to talk to her at her house, the university is a public place, maybe she will talk in a private place like her house.

      I've got a few ex-girlfriends that pretend I never existed, happens to everyone.
    3. Shogun
      Shogun
      Wait till holidays are over then visit her in person :D
    4. Shogun
      Shogun
      Just do what I said already, and the best will happen :D I can't guarantee anything, though sometimes the circumstance is beyond repair, or maybe you're just unlucky. I know, I've been unlucky before. No such thing as emotionally stupid, just inexperienced. I'm 15, but I have a lot of experience because I keep my eyes open and not just learn from my own mistakes, I learn from other people's mistakes as well, I've also started dating regularly early.

      Well, when are holidays over?

      Anyways, don't worry, you'll NEVER forget, nobody ever forgets. Forgetting and moving on are different things.
    5. Shogun
      Shogun
      P.S. Read this book buddy "Dangerous Men and Adventurous Women" look it up, if you can't find a free copy, go to the library, ask around I don't care, just read it. Helps you understand drama and girls so much more...I know it sound like it sucks, but it have a lot of good points to take note of
    6. Shogun
      Shogun
      Be prepared to move on or have her as a friend. It really depends on the circumstances, how serious it was and her. Maybe it will work, maybe it won't. It's not just for her, trying to fix it will help improve you as a man and it'll help in the future, maybe in ways you don't know or could never have imagined. If she becomes a friend, don't try to go back to the way things was, you didn't lose, life just took you on a different path, you won in a different way, life is more complicated then that. Trust me, it's important to have attractive female friends that is the type you'll go for (most of mine I did go for before). People like to socialize with people that are similar to them. So, you have a girl's opinion and advice, which is valuable especially if she's your type. Plus sometimes she just did the searching for you, maybe you can find your next chance in the people she socialize with.
    7. Shogun
      Shogun
      You asked about pride? I understand as a man, you gotta have pride. Just don't break down, sob and beg, and you'll have your pride. Pride is a tricky thing, I understand what you mean. Normally pride is good for you, I personally have a big ego, but when push comes to shove, it'll bite you in the ass and make you do stupid things. It's better to have confidence, it will always uplift you. And you know what else I learned? Empathy and responsibility enhances confidence. Being confident is better then having pride. Good leaders always take responsibility.

      She will respect you more if you are willing to swallow your pride for her, and that you can AFFORD to give up your pride because you have confidence to back it up. Pride is fragile, while confidence is unwavering. Have the confidence in yourself to give up pride, to let it go, because you believe in yourself.
    8. Shogun
      Shogun
      Don't call her, go to her. Show up on her doorstep and be there physically, even if it hurts, look her in the eyes and say it, it's okay if yours are watery (probably even better). But don't break down, sob and beg though, it's the worst thing you can do. I mean have the look of watery eyes but trying to hold it back. Make sure you make physical contact, but be gentle, human touch can have a comforting effect. I can't tell you want to say, but just imagine if you were her, have empathy and you'll know. Take responsibility for what happened. Tell her HOW it's your responsibility, not just "my bad, sorry".

      Oh yeah, when something like this happens, never wait for her to make a move, worst thing you can do. Anything BUT being there physically won't cut it.

      After it's over, pretend it never happened but keep it in mind and learn from it. She'll probably do the same, just don't bring it up again.
    9. Shogun
      Shogun
      Sorry I needed three different posts to explain, there's a character limit on sciforums :(. Anyways, I can explain it better if I was to know the entire story first, it's okay if you don't want to tell me because it's personal, I understand. I understand what it feels to ruin a good relationship with misunderstanding. My biggest regret (even I regret sometimes, I am human after all) in my dating life is ruining my chances with a girl two years ago, and she's the most beautiful girl I've ever met in my life. It's not misunderstanding between us, but of her parent's opinion of us but it was my fault (and her little sister's fault but she was 11 so I don't really blame her). We're still perfectly good friends, but the relationship is over.
    10. Shogun
      Shogun
      I think when you said what you said, you were thinking "What about my pride, I don't want to show weakness!" I understand, I've been there early on, so have my friends and people I know (I have a talent of learning from OTHER's mistakes, I have to say it my most valuable talent). No, manning up doesn't hurt your confidence and pride, nor does it show weakness. It shows you have enough faith in yourself to take the burden of responsibility, it makes you stronger. Remember, not to kiss her ass, because you'll come off as needy and weak and your apologies won't work as well, it means so much more when you are a confident man. Remember you are doing it to better yourself as a person not to drag her back, it NEVER works if you want to drag her back and cling on, have the mentality of fighting for her and to better yourself rather than holding on.
    11. Shogun
      Shogun
      Having said what I said, when something goes wrong I look FIRST TO MYSELF, not to blame others (if you habitually and honestly do that, then you can say there are times where it's honestly not your fault and you did your best), and you have to accept sometimes your best and other people's bests are not enough, then it's everybody's fault.

      Remember in a relationship you have to sacrifice and put in effort and fight for what you want (figuratively). You also have to accept sometimes life only gives you one opportunity, if you miss it, it's gone forever. You can't dwell on it, but learn from it and move on.

      Here's a little something, if you shed tears for a girl (for her, not yourself), it really soften her up on the inside. Try to feel how she's feeling.
    12. Shogun
      Shogun
      Allow me to explain, it's not ass-kissing, it's quite the contrary. Ass-kissing is actually bad for the relationship. You have to be in total control of yourself, be confident and have a sense of responsibility and seriousness. I'll use myself as an example, although I'm not perfect. I don't like to apologize and rarely do (unless it's serious and a matter of principles, then I will apologize), taking responsibility and apologizing are different. Apologizing is regret and condolence, you can express condolence without regret. I never second-guess myself, I just acknowledge the mistake, learn from it and keep marching forward and never look back. Regret won't help anyone, it's a sign of weakness and make people lazy and demotivates (unless like I said, it's serious and matter of life-changing principles). Responsibility motivates you to work harder. Some people crush under the burden of responsibility, some people rise above it. You have to be clutch.
    13. Shogun
      Shogun
      That's what he basically said, and for me, a person that only knows you, her and what happened from your explanation of it I kinda agree. I'm not saying it's true that's what you meant, it might've came off wrong when you tried to explain and summarize it to us, or to her originally for that matter. What you got to remember is no matter how pure your intentions are, people can only judge you by your actions not your thoughts. We think from what you wrote that you blamed everything on her. If I were you, I'll apologize to her and take full responsibility, and if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out, sometimes it doesn't right away, sometimes maybe forever. At the very least, you'll have an important life lesson and maybe she might become just a friend you can seek help from.

      Dude, remember you are the man in the relationship :D

      Good luck buddy :D If you need clarification, feel free to ask!
    14. Shogun
      Shogun
      I'll be glad to, he's basically saying you should have taken responsibility for the misunderstanding, and empathized with her rather than talking about your feelings first, you should have talked about her feelings and her pain. He's saying you were too aggressive and blamed her for everything, when you should have taken all the responsibility as a man. Try to feel now she feels, you know what I mean? You kinda made her feel guilty by saying it was her fault, if you taken responsibility it wouldn't have happened. Remember that she's a human being with feelings too, and girls have fragile feelings (even the one's with a big ego). They are soft on the instead and they'll hate themselves and feel that they are a burden to you.
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